Heart Value In Relationship

Since we are all interconnected through our many types of relationships, this is an article that can be beneficial to anyone. As we come to realize that its necessary to value all our relationships as an integral means to our Spiritual Growth, then they offer us an amazing space to shed light on the many intricate aspects of our lives. They do so by providing us with opportunities, interactions, conflict and choices. In our relationships we have much more than the opportunity to learn about the other, we have the gift of opportunity to learn about ourselves. We see in our relationships that what we may not otherwise see.

Relationships are mirrors and magnifiers that also serve as teachers. They mirror back to us the unfolding patterns, themes and dynamics that surface from the context and quality of those interactions and all too well the many others that came before them. When we’re willing to notice these, they have enormous potential to reveal unresolved issues that oftentimes require our attention for healing. It’s important to keep in mind that this stark reflection back is itself a blessing in disguise; as once we’re willing to do this we allow ourselves to tap into our Self-knowledge to discover our personal heart values that enhance our healing journey towards Self- actualization.

So one might ask, what happens when we find ourselves in less than satisfactory relationships? We can choose to take note of the discomfort as an element of contrast that serves as a wise, confronting teacher. This contrast mirrors back to us what we clearly do not want so that we may emphatically affirm with clarity what it is that we do want. Contrast is the mechanism that elicits our feelings that help us navigate not just within our primary relationships but also within the world at large. Recognizing this contrast is a useful way to discern layers of feelings so that they may be used for inner fulfillment and the heart value in relationship.

We learn how to define ourselves according to the heart values that feel most right to us, which means that we must know what we are willing to compromise on and what we are not. Some may say that all of life is a matter of compromise, however, I challenge you to reflect on what this really means? Of course, compromise in some ways can be constructive and good. Though if we refer to compromise simply as a means of avoidance because beneath the surface we are fearful or have low self-worth with an inability to ask or wait for what we want then compromise is only just a disguised defense. In this regard as stated, compromise is really indicative of a lack of conviction or belief in oneself, and at a higher level a lack of trust and faith.

Should compromise be used metaphorically like a band- aid for a wound that must first be cleaned, in order to heal then the concept itself needs to be honestly reconsidered. The metaphor is simple in that a band- aid cannot clean out the wound, it can only cover it up. We all know that this is how some have unconsciously chosen to deal with core issues of anger, abandonment, disappointment or unhappiness. Given this broad case scenario, we know that at some point the band- aid must be removed so that the wound can be cleaned out so it may begin to heal. The contrast inherent in this situation is that we deserve to nurture our own heart values in a sacred, pure environment.

The sensitivities of our own heart values tell us what is non-negotiable. This is our signature blueprint for what feels right to us. All in all, the bottom line is that to authentically align with your own heart values, it’s helpful to attune to your inner sense of balance. This balance is essentially a mind/body/spirit congruence that emanates from one source energy. When you are in touch with your body awareness and fullness of heart, then you can identify your core values and live from this place of wholeness in your relationships.

In closing I feel that one more point be made which is that, in honest relationship with oneself and other, if one person unintentionally hurts the other that the compassionate response is to say that you’re sorry. Apologizing when you know that you’ve hurt someone is a Heart Value that tells the other person that they are important and valuable to you. The reason I say this is to differentiate that this is not a compromise nor weakness. In fact, it is actually a gesture of courage and strength since it acknowledges that we all make mistakes because we are all human.

The heart value centered on trust and caring, from a place of honest communication, is what’s needed to value and honor relationship.

Author's Bio: 

Moreen (MSW, CC) integrates a holistic Mind, Body, Spirit philosophy in all her endeavors. She has enjoyed working in clinical and non -clinical settings with individuals of all age. She is a Life Purpose Coach, Heart Centered Hypnotherapist, Neuro-linguistic Programming (NLP), EMDR Level II as well as a Masters’ level Reiki Practitioner. She has training in Family Systems Theory and Parenting Education, as she herself is a parent to 2 grown daughters.

Moreen is currently dedicating her time to writing metaphysical and self-help literature. Her debut chapter, Self Trust, Self Care, Self Signature is featured in The Confident Woman (2013 Professional Woman Publishing).

In March 2014 her chapter entitled “Rebalance Your Reality” will be featured in The Female Leader. “Inner Wisdom” will be featured in Baby Boomers: Secrets for Life after 50 (Professional Woman Publishing). Her own book is in process (anthology format,) Divine Dimensions: Expressions In Daily Life, and she is also co-author of Your Heart’s Magical Journey (currently in illustration stage).

Contact Moreen for Free Lance Writing
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