The first step in getting your ex back begins by opening the lines of communication with him/her. However, what, when, and how we say influences the future course of events. If you have decided to give your relationship one more try then you will have to get back on talking terms and here are seven steps that you need to follow.

Appear casual
You will have to show your ex that you are okay with the breakup and act very casual with him/her. If you feel that he/she is ignoring you then let them lose some steam before you call them to ask how they are doing. When you do call your ex be casual and keep the call very brief.

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Meet your ex
Once the ice has been broken on the phone then you have to meet your ex. This will take some planning as you don't want to look needy and desperate. Either hang around his/her office and when you meet them act as if you happened to be in that area. Or else you can also get yourself invited to the party your ex is attending. Either way you need to meet him/her so that you take the next step.

Show of confidence
Since you are acting as if the meeting was not planned, put on a brave face and act confidently. This will convince your ex that you have no agenda in meeting them.

Take ownership
At the fag end of the short meeting take ownership of your part in the breakup. Tell your ex that on hindsight you realize that you too acted in haste.

Apologize if necessary
The next step is tendering an apology. However, you should do that only if you are the guilty party. If you had no role in causing the breakup then skip this step and go to the next step.

Extract a commitment to meet often
Tell your ex that as ex partners you should meet once in a while. Remind your ex that no matter what you still share a past together and that should be reason enough to meet once in a while as friends. If you are honest and sincere he/she will not object to your offer.

Go on the charm offensive
As you begin to meet often talk to your ex as if you are still partners. Instead of using the words "You", "Me", and "I" start saying things like "We", "Us" or "We both" etc. This will establish the emotional connection once again. Once that is done you will have to start the charm offensive and begin impressing your ex once again. Even before your ex realizes what is going on he/she will begin thinking of you more often. From here you are only a few steps away from a happy reunion.

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As soon as you tell yourself that it is highly possible to get your ex back into your arms again, you are on the road to success! Believe in yourself and go ahead in a positive manner. These tips will help you get him back and save your relationship in a wonderful manner.

Don't let him guess how desperately you want him back
The best way to make him notice you all over again is to surprise him first. He probably expects you to be devastated and miserable, so shock him by looking happy and excited to be back in the social scene. Let him get the idea that you are doing fine and are not pining for him anymore.

Take time away from him
You need to stay away from him as long as it is possible. You have got to change back into the woman he fell in love with in the first place and even better! He has to start wondering about you - where you are, what you are up to and more importantly, who you are seeing right now.

Surprise him by the way you look now
Remember the way you used to look when he first fell in love with you? Well you should strive to look like that, so pay a lot of attention to your dressing and personal style. Make an effort to remind him why he loved you so desperately those days. Make him see you as a more mature and attractive person.

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Make sure that he notices how much you have changed
Just changing your looks is not going to make him come back to you. He could just admire you from afar but hesitate to get closer if he thinks that the major issues and problems you had still exist! Get rid of those habits that used to drive him up the wall and change your attitudes. These changes will make him more interested in getting back.

Be seen with other guy friends
It is a fact that your ex would hate to see you move on in his heart of hearts! If you are seen with other guy friends, he is going to be plagued with fears and doubts about you going away from him forever! It is good to make him a little jealous and goad him into trying to make a connection with you again.

Be in touch with his friends but ignore him
Nothing will irritate your ex more than the fact that you are ignoring him! What will make it worse is the fact that you are paying more attention to his friends. When his friends begin to talk about you and admire you he is bound to get jealous and may try to get back with you.

Get back with mutual friends and build opportunities for you to meet
You should try your best to stay in touch with him in a round-about way. Getting back with mutual friends will give you opportunities to flaunt your new style and sexy look! Make sure that he begins to notice how attractive and tempting you are. The more he gets to "see" you - the more he will want you back!

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Maybe you still have feelings for your ex and it is awkward when you come face to face or if you have moved on; still it is not a pleasant situation to be in. What ever the circumstances, you do not want your ex to see your vulnerability especially if they are with their current date. The following tips will help you give an idea of what you should do when in such a situation.

If still single show that you are happy
You may still have a crush on your ex, but do not let him/her see that especially if they are with their current date, instead let them see how happy you are. Dress well, keep up your appearance and act normal.

Show that you don't care
There is no point appearing needy or vulnerable in front of your ex. You end up showing yourself in poor light by behaving this way. Let your ex see that it does not bother you who he/she is with and that you are happy for them. Believe in yourself, someone special is waiting for you.

Respect yourself
Tell yourself that you don't need them and have confidence in yourself. Assert your independence; know that you and no one else is responsible for your happiness and that you do not depend on anyone to make you a complete person. Your inner strength will help you through any situation.

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Be civil and polite
If you are in a situation where you cannot avoid being with them, in college or in your office, just be polite to them and keep the conversation short. You do not want the awkwardness to affect your work atmosphere.

Keep your distance
Do not go on talking to your ex like you did when you were in the relationship if it affects you. If your ex wants to be friends with you and you too are ready for it you can give it a try. This can melt the negative feelings and maybe with time you are ready to give your ex a second chance.

Be yourself
Do not try to put on an act and just be your own self in such a situation. It is always better to be a great version of your own self than a second rate version of someone you are not. Move on after exchanging the hellos'.

Remain composed
No matter what you are going through outwardly show that you are calm and composed and do not give your ex the satisfaction that they still have the power to unsettle you.

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You want your ex back but you obviously don't want to beg! It is important to first find out what his feelings are for you at this point. Once you are savvy about the way he feels and your gut feeling is that he won't put up too much of a fight then go ahead and use these tips!

Let him know that you have forgiven him
It is of great importance that he does not think that you still have issues and unforgiveness in your heart. He is not going to feel encouraged to get back into a relationship with you if he thinks that he has to first battle it out with you. Sow seeds of forgiveness and you will reap a harvest of healing and love.

Don't put the blame on him for the failed relationship
Remember that it always takes two hands to clap and even if he was to blame in a great way, the fact that you are considering getting him back means that you have actually come to terms with it and are willing to forget whatever it was that caused the breakup. Blaming him will not help but letting him know that you don't blame him will tell him that you want to make up.

Start flirting with him all over again
Your ex will be secretly pleased and happy to see that you still consider him attractive and sexy. If you begin to flirt with him again, he might respond instantly to you. You know what turns him on so go ahead and do, say or wear the right thing that will let him know in no uncertain terms that you want him back.

What if your lover already left you? Here's how to get them back.

Be friends and be there for him!
If you continue to show him that you are still a good friend who will always be there for him it will prove that you have no hard feelings and are willing to start afresh. In the beginning don't try to be more than a friend. Wait till the trust and desire is back - then you can be truthful and get him back.

Don't look at another man
He probably expects you to date other men and move on. If you want him to know that you want to get back with him, don't even look at another man. Make him notice that you are not behaving in a manner that proves that you are single and available. By doing this, you are showing him indirectly that you believe you are still his.

See if you can make him desire you again
One thing that will prove to you that there is a good chance of getting back together is when you can prove that the spark of desire is still there. Ignite that spark by turning him on by the way you look. Make him aware that you are as gorgeous and sexy as ever and give him a chance to respond to your subtle signals that you still adore him.

Show him that you still remember!
If you show him that you still remember all the little things and details that meant so much to the both of you, it will touch his heart and he will find himself responding. Send him cards - birthday and others to let him know that you have him still entrenched in your memory. This will motivate him to remember you too!

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There are specific techniques that will show you exactly what to do and what to say to get your ex lover back in your arms- Especially if you are the only one trying... Visit What to Say to Get Your Ex Back to find out more.

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