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How Do You Know It’s Love?

Written by Judith Sherven, PhD & Jim Sniechowski, PhD

Topic: Relationship AdvicePublished April 4, 2008
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Real love and real romance, the kind that lasts a nlifetime, that’s what most people want. n nSo why does dating have a bad rap? And why do nmore than half of all marriages end up in divorce? n nThe answer’s pretty clear when you look at what nmost people settle for, or worse yet, put up with. n nBut, the fact is, there’s a world of deep spiritual nconnection, great adventure, and rich unfolding nromance . . . all available when you know nwhat you’re looking for . . . and how to let love nlead every day.n nIn our twenty years of being together(nineteen married)nwe’ve conducted an informal survey of couples nwho obviously have remarkable relationships. n nYoung and older, they all shared several things nin common.n n1) The other person was not their type. n n2) There wasn’t instant chemistry. n n3) They very often met in a way that was unusual, nunpredictable, or at least unexpected. n n4) They frequently had significant differences. nThese are just a few real life examples: :n nReligion—Christian and Jewish, Buddhist and Agnostic nPolitics—Democrat and Republican, Avid campaigner and non-voter nNationality—German and Japanese, Chinese and Jewish nAge—16-21 years apart nShe’s Older—11-20 years beyond his years nShe’s Taller—she’s 6'2" and he’s 5'9" n n5) One or both people were often in debt or some kind of nfinancial stress.n n6) One or both were in the middle of some kind of nbusiness or career upheaval . . . or . . . n n7) Frequently what the other did for a living was initially nquite unsettling—one southern princess fell in love with nand married a sewer maintenance supervisor, an elegant nfive-star hotel event booker fell in love with and married na thoroughly tattooed truck driver, and a conservative, nhome-body father of two fell in love with and married na free-spirited adventurer who travels in her work. n n8) Often, one of them was married or not yet divorced nwhen they met. n nSo, bottom line, some aspects of these outstanding nrelationships came from beyond what they’d imagined, nbeyond their previous ideas and experience of love. n nAnd all of them had the same experience we’d had. nWhether it took days, weeks or sometimes months, nthey realized without a doubt that this was the nrelationship of their lives. n nHow did they know it was lasting love? n nAs we did and still do, all of these people experience nthe challenge of their differences as a profound spiritual nteacher, expanding and enhancing their experience of living nand loving. n nAnd, just as it remains true for us today, twenty years after nmeeting, all of these couples remain committed to letting love lead. nWherever love takes them, they follow—heart and soul—knowing nthat while real life love isn’t always easy, it is always the finest ntransformational magician they’ve ever known. n nAnd the ultimate reward for letting love lead? nDeep, joyous appreciation for being together. Every day! n

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About the Author

Judith Sherven and Jim Sniechowski invite you to nreceive more of what you want by getting their nbonus program "The Power of Receiving" - Just go to www.judithandjim.com/receiving

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