How To Be A Submissive Wife: A Wife Should Submit To Her Husband - The Necessity For Submission In Marriage

Submission is to agree with, accept or yield to an authority, usually a higher authority. Submission, within the context of marriage, is the means by which a woman aligns herself with the mission of her husband, understanding that he is the head of the home and abiding by his authority. To submit is to give up her ''rights'' with regards to her husband.

Submission eliminates pride from the life of a wife and makes her to be selfless and to place the needs of her husband above hers. A submissive wife will take sides with her husband in all matters without necessarily falling out of tune with God. Submission is not a sign of weakness or foolishness as many women see it today.

If women think that it is a display of foolishness to be submissive to their husbands and can not submit, then we can see where their 'wisdom' has led them to: collapsed marriages, endurable or strained marriages, single parenthood, high divorce rates, etc which are contrary to the will of God.

Submission makes the woman to respect her husband and to follow him in his plans and projects. It enables her to have a quiet and a teachable spirit, to take to correction and reason with her husband. Having a submissive spirit enables the woman to respect her husband, see him as her head and to cooperate with him.

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It is a commandment from God, the creator in The Bible, in Ephesians 5:22 that a 'wives shall submit themselves unto their husbands as unto the Lord.' This means that only a woman who has submitted to the Lord that can submit to her husband. The failure by many wives to submit to the Lord by compliance to His word, and to submit to their husbands in obedience to God, is one of the major reasons why marriages are strained and falling apart.

If a wife can not submit to her husband, then what is the proof of her love to her husband? You can only submit to a person whom you love. If a wife can not love her husband whom she sees, how can she love God whom she does not see?

The fact that the wife is submissive does not authorize her husband to be a dictator in the home. Accordingly, according to Ephesians 5:21, the man is also expected to submit to his wife because she is a part of his destiny. This means that the man should not disregard the counsel of his wife. Being a man/husband is a privilege and therefore, the husband in the home should appreciate it by respecting the woman whom God created to be his helpmate.

The ability to submit to each other is one of the contributory factors to success in marriage which is a lifelong commitment and must not be broken. The man is the head while the woman is the neck and the head can not be separated from the neck. We can not turn our heads without turning our necks just as we can not turn our necks without turning our heads. This is the essence and the wisdom of submitting to each other.

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Changes happen everywhere, in us, as well as around us. We easily notice the change in the attitude or behavior of others but it is difficult to admit that we are also changing. Similarly, if you notice that your husband's nature has changed, and then what are you going to do? If you think that your husband used to be loving and caring about you before but now he doesn't seem to be that close, then you must act quickly and think of taking corrective measures to make your husband happy once more. He won't come and tell you what he feels about things, you have to take the initiative, recognize the situation and rectify before any damage.

You should know exactly what you should do to cheer him up again so that he starts loving you like before.

Even if your relationship is on the verge of a break up, if you know the right way to go about it, you can save it. Not only you can stop it from breaking, but also you will be able to take it to a new level and establish deep understanding and love between both of you.

What if your spouse don't love you anymore? Here's how to get them addicted to you like when you fell in love for the first time

Have a sense of mystery

When you become quite readable for your husband, that is, when he can guess your thoughts every time he looks at you, you lose that sense of mystery that attract a man. Though living together does make two people familiar, but a woman should always be sure to carry an aura of mystery with her. That will keep her man hooked to her and interested in her always. And in that process he will be a happy man once more.

Make him happy and feel special

In a marital relationship, as time goes by, you start to take your husband for granted. You might not even realize that you are doing so. You always are at your loving best when you get married but this caring way of yours fades away with time. Maybe its there but you cease to show it. It is understandable that there are a lot of responsibilities on you and a lot of work at home. But that shouldn't change the way you used to be with your husband. You should make him feel special and loved.

Compliment your husband sometimes and it is sure to make him happy. Make him feel special by giving him a surprise sometimes. Do such things that will make him feel that he is still a priority for you. These steps are sure to make your husband happy once more and you will also feel on top of the world, as you are able to make your special one happy.

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Never bet on a marriage tip.

You may have noticed that there are a lot of "marriage tips" out there. Most are common sense. Some are faith-based. A few are even based on research about what makes marriages succeed and fail. And just about all are as useful as tips about the stock market and horse racing.

That's because it's almost always just one party reading the "tips," usually the one who most wants change in the relationship. If the one reading the tips enacts them unilaterally, no matter how sound the tips might be, he or she is likely to seem manipulative to the other partner. It could hardly seem otherwise, since people are less likely to seek tips on being better partners than on getting their partners to be better.

That's unfortunate, because the only reliable way to get a better partner is to become one.

There's not much to be done about just one partner reading marriage tips, simply because people tend to seek partners who are temperamentally different. If you are the sort of person who reads marriage tips, you are probably married to someone who wouldn't be caught dead a dentist's waiting room reading one. So the following tips (do I ever hate that word) are designed to help you be a better partner and, incidentally, have a much better chance of your partner reacting positively to your efforts.

Tip # 1: If you're certain you're right, you're probably wrong. Certainty is an emotional state, not an intellectual one. If you feel certain that you are right and your partner is wrong, you are most likely ignoring, misunderstanding, misinterpreting, or undermining his/her perspective. Even if your perspective is factually correct, it is, at best, incomplete, without a thorough understanding of your partner's. When you feel certain that you are right and your partner is wrong, sympathetically state his/her perspective the best you can - not what you think of it, but what it's like in his/her shoes. You will likely find that your certainty resolves into more realistic binocular vision - an ability to see your relationship more dynamically and in greater depth by perceiving both perspectives simultaneously, much like musicians in a duet.

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Tip #2: Be more of what you're asking for and less about your complaint. The principle here is that blaming your partner is the same as self-blame. For instance, if I think my partner is aloof, my judgmental attitude creates greater distance between us; if I think she's nagging, I'm not listening; I lack sensitivity when I think she's insensitive. When you want to complain to your partner, think first how you can be 10 % more flexible, fair, loving, compassionate, supportive, intimate, sexy - whatever you want to complain about, be more of it yourself. This will temper your emotional demeanor (make you less complaining, demanding, superior) which will make it easier for your partner to be open to you in response.

Tip #3: Don't worry about "communication" problems. Couples in conflict - or in cold stand-offs - do not have communication problems. They have value problems, having made their dispute more important than their connection and love for each other. No matter what communication tools they employ, they are really saying: "I cannot love you unless you agree with me or do what I want." Attempting to "communicate" without getting in touch with deeper values of what is most important to and about you will be worse than useless; it will likely damage your relationship.

Tip #4: Talk less, connect more. Problems in intimate relationships are not resolved by talking. They're resolved by connecting. Talking without a desire to connect will make things worse. Connecting makes both talking and problem-solving much easier. If you think of serious problems you've overcome in your relationships, you will realize that you did not overcome them until you valued your connection and showed a desire to connect. It wasn't what you said or how you said it that brought improvement; it was your motivation to say it, i.e., to connect to the most important adult in your life.

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Marriage is called an institution for a reason. It requires concerted efforts and maintenance to ensure that daily frictions with your partner and with life do not develop into marital problems that bring your marriage to its knees or its abrupt end. Since you are the one who wants to ensure happily-ever-after then you must make sure that your contribution to the marriage minimizes the effect of friction and marital problems. Here are the 3 key decisions that you must start making so that you can minimize marital problems.

1. Getting married is the start of a journey. I know you thought that you had gotten them and that the work was all done but the truth is that one phase of your journey is done and the next phase has just started. Just like you put effort and consideration in courting your partner you need to keep expending similar effort and consideration to keep your partner happy in marriage. What did you do to get your partner? How did you treat them during courtship? How was your grooming and hygiene during courtship? Resist the temptation to relax and stop doing these same things. If they loved these deeds during courtship why do you think that they will not appreciate them now? Marriage is not a free pass to ignoring your partner and their feelings!

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2. I am in this marriage for keeps. I know that almost half of marriages end in divorce but you must decide that, that is not an option for you. Decide today that divorce will not be part of your reality. Once you have done this then your priority will be to treat your partner well since you are 'stuck' with them. You will not pour fuel into the fire when you are in marital crisis since you know that the fire will have to be put out. You will tend to look at marital problems as obstacles that must be solved or removed as opposed to things that you should run away from. This also helps you focus your energy into making your marriage as great as it can be since you are in it for the long haul.

3. This is the person I am meant to be with. Once you are married your eyes will 'be open' and you will begin to notice some really nice and attractive people that seem better suited to you then your partner. Decide today that your partner is the person that you were meant to be with. If you notice attractive people appreciate them and move on as they are not meant for you. This will be particularly hard when your partner is being ugly in speech and deed but for you to minimize marital problems you must make this decision. This will help you seal off the option of looking for a replacement for your partner without doing all that you can into your marriage.

Once you have made these 3 decisions and have made them part of your reality then your attitude will be that of dealing with problems as they come. You will also expend creative energy to keeping you and your partner as healthy and happy as possible.

Saying or doing the wrong thing can actually cause your spouse to feel even more distant from you. You can make your spouse fall back in love with you, all over again.

You don't have to worry about whether your spouse is on the brink of asking you for a divorce. You can control the situation and use specific techniques to naturally make them fall hopelessly in love with you.

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