Self esteem and relationships

Trying to build an intimate relationship with someone else when you're struggling with low self esteem can be a very daunting task. It can seem very innocent and ecstatic at first but when the newness wears off and you're left with a relationship built on a shaking foundation things can get pretty ugly real quick.

I would advice that you build your self love and self acceptance before you enter into a relationship with someone else. The chances of that relationship being healthy and standing the test of time is slim to none.

Now I don't want to come across as a negative Nancy or anything but it's a lot better to build your own self up and then get into a relationship with another self confident person.

Otherwise it's all backwards. It's like trying to build a house without the foundation in place first. That's why I strongly recommend that the first relationship you build is the one with yourself.

Once you have a deep intimate relationship with yourself you're going to be able to experience the real joy and satisfaction that comes from having an intimate relationship with someone else.

Building your self esteem and a relationship with yourself
Your first job is to find things that you truly love and accept about yourself at this very moment. You must find things to build on.

If you're unhappy with all of who you are then getting into a relationship with someone else is going to cause you even more pain. Maybe more pain then you can handle right now.

Start making a running list of all the positive qualities you posses. Write down all the successful accomplishments you've experienced. And all the joyful and exciting times that you can remember from your past and present.

This will help you get to know yourself better and it'll also help you discover all the good stuff that you love about yourself now.

This will boost your confidence and get you headed in the right direction to attract a suitable mate.

Let yourself know you care - every day

Don't let another day go by without letting yourself know how much you love, appreciate, care, understand, and enjoy - you!

Yes, you need to give yourself that attention in order to open yourself up to receive it. Because if you get into a relationship without this openness you'll miss or take for granite all the compliments your partner gives you.

You'll suspect that he/she is just saying that to make you feel good.

That's why it's so important to build your self esteem first and then get into a loving and committed relationship with someone else second.

Author's Bio: 

Michelle sears is the author of a personal development website that is packed full of information. Michelle's site was created to help people just like you create a deep loving relationship with yourself. A relationship that will affect every single area of your life - in a good way. Visit her on her website at or on her Facebook fan page at