How to Date an Extrovert When You Are An Introvert
Written by Derek Carter
They say opposites attract. While scientifically, that is a proven fact, when it comes to human relationships, that concept maybe a myth. The human dynamics are complex and hard to predict the kind of person you may end up with as a partner.
It is so dynamic that you can end up with a partner that is exactly like you or completely opposite of you.
Ending up with someone completely opposite of you may pose some small challenges, but nothing you cannot overcome. One of the most common “mismatches” in dating is personality – extrovert vs introvert.
So how do you make sure your relationship with extrovert works when you are an introvert? Below are some of the pointers to help you out.
Meet your extroverted partner halfway
Find a way to meet your partner halfway. After all, relationships are all about compromises. Your extroverted partner will occasionally go out, live loud and wild, and you should try to find a way to be ok with that or try to also do some of those social things with them.
Do not just sit at home when your partner is out with their friends every evening. When you try to be social, your extroverted partner will notice your effort and will also try to stay indoors sometimes with you.
Remember the two of you have contrasting personalities and so it won’t be fair if one of you asked the other to follow them completely.
Sit down and create a win-win situation.
Communication needs to be open
Communication is essential in all types of relationships, including romantic. For an introvert, you will sometimes be overwhelmed by the feelings of emotion dump by your extroverted partner. While it is not wise to burst out in the height of emotions, you don’t have to wait longer before opening an important discussion about how you feel.
Let your partner know your true feelings
If either of you do not like something, it is better to clear things out sooner rather than later. Introverts tend to bottle up their feelings, so it could help if an extroverted partner encouraged their introverted partners to speak out.
Extroverts sometimes may feel like they are the only ones talking and expressing their feelings in the relationship. Your introvert partner may not even give their opinion on the restaurant to eat or the movie to watch, which can be frustrating to the extrovert.
To encourage the expression of feelings in the relationship, consider using open-ended questions when talking rather than closed-ended questions.
If you are feeling left out by your extremely social partner, say something.
Letting your partner understand your true feelings will significantly help your relationship because the other person will never know about them if you don’t share.
Each of you should plan dates
Introverts tend to go along with the current, even when they are uncomfortable. This is why an introvert must show more effort and take initiative when planning your dates.
Choose a place that will work for both of you, such as a low-traffic restaurant or a coffee shop or even a nice walk in the park.
Don’t be judgmental
The moment you start being judgmental of your partner that is when cracks will start to appear in your relationship. Being judgmental is never a good trait and can destroy the trust that your partner has cultivated on you.
The two of you have different personalities. You will like things that the other person doesn’t like. Respect each other’s shortcomings and rights without sacrificing yours.
The best way to avoid being judgmental is by learning to be respectful. Respect your partner’s needs but at the same time, let them know when they are disrespectful of your needs. If you feel your partner should come to a certain event or a party, nicely tell them how important it is to you.
You may have to compromise
Finding a compromise in a relationship can go a long way to ensuring the happiness of both the two of you. It is important to find a situation that satisfies both parties.
It will help you and your partner to remember that being an extrovert or introvert is not a fault. Both personality traits have pros and cons. An extrovert might be good at conversation starter, but bad at listening.
Create win-win situations to avoid confrontations or friction in your relationship.
For instance, you can take two cars into an invited event so that the introvert partner can leave early if they want, which is better than not showing up at all.
The most important part about creating a win-win situation is committing to it. Make a strong commitment to both of your shortcomings. This will help you always find a resolution that suits both of you.
Remember why you fell in love
Always go back to why you like or love the other person and remember why you are together as a couple. Maybe you fell in love in the first place because you are two different people.
Extroverts and introverts can build a beautiful, sustainable relationship together, but it takes compromises and respect for one another’s shortcomings.
Conclusion
So, there you go, 7 ways to make an introvert-extrovert relationship work for both of you. If you are in this kind of relationship, you do not need to fear for the worst.
Just like any other time of relationship, communication, and being mindful of one another's feelings will help you create a balanced, healthy relationship.
There is no perfect relationship, embracing your partner’s inadequacies is what makes it perfect.
Also, being an introvert or extrovert is not a fault, it is personality. And you don’t have to be the same to fall in love.
Article author
About the Author
Derek Carter is founder of CoolDatingAdvice.com a website that helps people find that one person to date or fall in love with. He contributes articles about every aspect of dating. His articles are published on many different relationships and dating websites. Learn more about dating visit CoolDatingAdvice.com.
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