Only we can decide whether or not we wish to end a friendship. I will tell you how to make sure you want to and how to end a friendship if you really do want to...

There are all different types of friendships and there are all different reasons fo ending a friendship. Friendships usually die a natural death when one or the other gets married or finds a new person who takes up a lot more of their time,
gets a job or changes their job so that they are spending a lot of time at work now or moving. Choosing to end a friendship is a whole new thing.

If you ask most people about their friendships they will claim that they have loads of friends but if you then pin them down to details, facts and proof it will often be that most of these "friends" are people they have not been in contact with, let alone seen, for a long time... acquaintances. A true friend is someone that you enjoy to spend time with, make a point of keeping in touch with and make time for no matter how busy you are, not someone you just bump into if you both work at the same place or go to the same club.

True friends are rare and precious things and for that reason we should be cautious about ending a friendship. Whatever this friend is like and whatever your reasons for wanting to end the friendship it always boils down to this. You want certain things from the friendship which they do not supply. Presumably your friend feels that you are a good friend to them or they would have ended their relationship with you.

So... why do you want to know how to end a friendship? What did you want from this friendship that you do not get?

Most people seek good company when they have a friend, someone to chat to and maybe confide in, someone to go out with or share a hobby with. If the friend has become boring because they often sit with a miserable long face then perhaps they need cheering up, advice or help, sympathy and a shoulder to cry on? It is doubtful that they were like that when you met them because if they had been you would not have bothered to make friends with them! If it is their natural personality then you should not have gone past day one.

If you seek more from a friend such as borrowing or being given money, lifts in their car, free babysitting and other such tasks then it is not really a friendship in the first place. Friends do not exploit or use each other and friendship should be a two way thing where if one does favours for the other they are reciprocated and returned in some way. If you are constantly helping your friend but they never help you then maybe the solution is to stop helping them!

The solution to this may not have to be as drastic as ending the friendship. It might be better for you to see them less or change the dynamics and boundaries of the relationship so that it is more in keeping with your own needs. Be very careful about ending a relationship as true friends who care about you only come along now and then.

If you still need to know how to end a friendship then ask yourself hand on heart if you will be better off with or without this friend. Then if the answer is that you know you will be better off without them decide whether it is better to lose contact with them and not return their calls or explain it to them. There are no hard and fast rules because each individual situation is totally unique. If your friend has become selfish, unreliable or dishonest then simply tell them that you are hurt and you deserve better. But do not tell them thinking that if you say it they will change.

People tend to be what they are. Your friend may be a decent person inside but sometimes promise something like a phone call and then forget for a week. That is hardly enough reason to end the friendship and you would find you would regret ending it for such a silly reason. Then you need to look at why it matters to you so much and fill your life with other things so that your week's happiness does not depend on that phone call. Never look for perfection in your friends. You are not perfect and probably do things that annoy them too. By a leading life coach, psychic and agony aunt at

Author's Bio: 

At Top agony aunt, psychic and life coach. Famous clients, praised by journalists, experts and profesionals. Private consultations by phone and email. Much free advice on site.