How to get a Real Answer to âHow was your day?â
Written by Kimberly Chastain
Do you have a daily routine that goes something like this at your house? You ask your children, spouse, friend, etc. "How was your day?" Then, do you either get a grunt in return, a fine or whatever? Maybe every once in a blue moon you will get a rather long and involved answer. Sometimes when we ask co-workers that question we truly want to know the answer, but sometimes we really don't. Often, the How was your day comment is just a pleasantry.
I have a new question for you that will open up the lines of communication and get to the heart of what is going on in your children's lives, spouse's life, friend's lives, co-workers lives, etc. I cannot take the credit for this question. The Children's Director at our church shared this with me and it has been very helpful. Are you ready for the question? How can I pray for you? When you read that question what did you think? You have to stop and think for a minute and almost catch your breath. This question gets to the heart of what is going on with your children, the big and the little. I try from time to time to ask my children this question at bedtime and I get some amazing answers. Often, about things that are going on that I did not know about. One time the answer was, pray that I get one of the big lockers and not one of the small ones. Another is praying that my friends and I won't fight on the playground. Often the answers can be to pray for their friends and their situations.
The beauty of this question is it often takes the focus off the trivial stuff and what is really important in your child's life. Lockers can be a big deal when you are in middle school and busy parents cannot always hear or see that issue. Your children will also feel special knowing that their Mom is praying for them on a specific issue.
This would be a great question for an unsaved co-worker. I had a client call me who I had not seen for some time. She asked me to pray for her, due to having breast cancer. She said, “I knew you prayed so I decided to call you.” When you see someone having a hard time, you can ask, "How can I pray for you?" How soothing and caring.
So, give it a try today with your children, spouse, friends, and co-workers. You will get some answers you did not quite expect. You can also develop a deeper relationship with the person you have asked. How can I pray for you today?
Article author
About the Author
Kimberly M. Chastain, MS, LMFT is the Christian Working Mom Coach and a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist. She is the author of 2 ebooks, Pearls of Encouragement for Christian Working Moms and Help! My Preteen/Teenager is Driving me Nuts. You can find both of those books at www.christianworkingmom.com. Also, check out her blog and Online Bible Study as well. You can have coaching tips delivered to your email box daily, find out more at http://www.kimberlychastain.com/cwmtips.htm.
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