The vast majority of us will have been dumped at some point in our lives and will be well aware of how emotional and distressing such a situation can be. When we get dumped our natural reaction is generally to want to get back together as soon as possible. If you are thinking that you want to get your ex back, therefore, you will first need to consider whether or not the relationship is worth pursuing.

If you do realise that you want to get them back then there are certain steps that you need to take in order to achieve this. The first step is crucial - cut contact immediately. All of the fibres of your being are going to be advising you to contact your ex, but this is the worst thing you can do.

If you don't stay in contact with them then this will do two things. Firstly, it will help you to get over them. If you're constantly text in them, calling them, and seeing them, this is going to make the healing process longer and more drawn out. Secondly, if you are not in contact then they will constantly be wondering what you are doing.

This is somewhat flips the balance of power and is very important. When you break up with someone you expect them to try to contact you. If they don't, suddenly your natural reaction is to start thinking about what they are doing. You will start thinking that they are simply getting on with their lives, and this makes them more attractive to you. As such, if you want to get your ex back, make sure you're not in contact with them from the word go.

Obviously, you will be hurting. This is completely natural and therefore you need to work to build up your confidence. Your confidence will certainly have been damaged by the breakup and you are never going to be able to get back together if you are continually acting like a snivelling and miserable wreck.

Start building your confidence, therefore, by spending time with your friends, taking up a new hobby, changing your clothes, getting a new haircut, or even seeing other people. Seeing other people is also a good idea because this may well get back to your ex, especially if you have the same friends. Them thinking of you with another person will get some serious feelings of jealousy flowing.

After a few weeks, or even months, you should be feeling far more confident and far more happy in yourself. By this stage you may not even want to get back together. If you do, however, you can then suggest a casual meeting. Simply call them up and say that you would like to go free coffee for a catch up.

When you see them, act casual and confident and show them what they are missing. Don't necessarily bring up the idea of getting back together, just show them that you are interested through your body language and the way you act. If there are any feelings remaining, the chances are fairly high that they will suggest another meeting. From here you can start to rebuild a fresh relationship.

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