How To Handle A Flirting Husband: When Your Husband Flirts In Front Of You - What To Do When A Spouse Flirts Too Much

A husband who often flirts with other women can be a source of stress for any wife. There are men out there who just possess this habit of impressing every attractive woman they meet even though it's only the first time they've actually seen each other. There are even others fond of referring to other women, new acquaintance or friends, as hon, love or sweetie. And still, there are men who are so generous with words that they can easily say I love you to other ladies other than their wives even though it's said in jest.

So if you're a wife, you can get tired and irritated with this kind of attitude. You can often question why your husband can easily put his arms around another woman or call another lady with pet names and they're not even you. It somehow hits you and makes you feel a little guilty that you may be lacking something the reason why your hubby may not be that showy to you as he is with other women.

What are you to do then to tame your partner? First, acknowledge your feelings. Do a self-assessment to find out if you're feeling neglected and if a great deal of his affection is being shared with others. Or it may be that your husband is just the open and flirty type but is not actually serious with those gestures and words. He may be the kind of guy who only wants to make a good impression on others. You can also ask yourself if his actions really make you insecure.

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Discussing this issue with your husband is a good start as well. Your partner may not be aware at all that his gestures are annoying you so it may be good idea to let him know how you feel about his actions. Avoid accusing your spouse about trying to woo other women but be honest when you talk to him about your hurt feelings every time you see him in a sweet talk with another woman. It's vital that he knows he should also be more sensitive to your needs and feelings.

Another important but difficult step is to understand your spouse. After you've discussed the issue and you find there's nothing serious to how he acts and refers to other women, then a little understanding won't hurt. Mutual understanding is crucial in any marriage because without this, you will find yourselves often in conflict with one another.

On your part as the wife, you also need to express your love more to your hubby. Show it in a variety of ways at home from the small things to the big surprises. Eventually when you're consistent in this aspect, you'll find yourself being appreciated by your husband.

And don't forget to make yourself look good all the time. Men want their wives to be in their best even when just at home so take the time to beautify yourself without having to spend much. Get a new haircut, manicure or pedicure and spray yourself with great scents as often as you can. In this way, your hubby will be attracted to only you, his wife.

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Many wives have habits they carry around from childhood, single life and previous relationships. Some of these habits are great and can help to build a healthy and lasting marriage.

However, there are those habits that some wives refuse to let go of although they are destroying their marriage.

If you can relate to the four habits we will be looking at below, it is time to get rid of them if you are serious about saving your marriage.

A Demanding Tone

Sometimes wives can have some extremely unreasonable expectations of their husbands. They forget that their strengths are not necessarily their husbands' strengths. Therefore, they become demanding when certain needs are not met.

It is never appropriate to demand something from someone; this also applies to your spouse and children. Your tone should always be welcoming and respectful. Ensure that your vocabulary includes words such as please and thank you.

A Disrespectful and Neglectful Attitude

For most husbands there are mainly two things they desire from their wives. Surprisingly, if these two things are satisfied all is well for them. They are respect and sex. To me this is not much to ask.

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But for some wives they find it extremely impossible to give either of the two. They neglect the basic needs of their husbands and wonder why he is so moody, uncommunicative and sometimes harsh.

If you had some bad experiences with these two issues in your past, you may need to get some help to overcome them. If you don't you may push your husband so far away that there is no getting him back.

A Quarrelsome Nature

Proverbs chapter twenty one and verse nine sums up this point beautifully, "Better to live on a corner of the roof than to share a house with a quarrelsome wife". This is exactly how your husband may be feeling; he would prefer to stay away from the home than to go to home to another quarrel.

A quarrelsome nature is definitely not appealing and it is a habit that too many wives hold on to because they think it is their only weapon against their spouse. However, it is a weapon against their marriage, and each time they use it, it is slowing killing their marriage.

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When I began my research into what I needed to know in order to help people have a happy marriage one of the first things I looked for were the actions that lead to unhappiness. Still my simple idea was, and still remains, if you are doing everything right the wrong things don't have time to slip in. If your behavior is right on, and I don't mean perfect, your marriage will be happy beyond anything you ever imagined. God didn't invent marriage to be a nest of troubles and problems. He invented marriage to be a safe haven from a very pressure filled and troublesome world. He helped you find your spouse so you could grow from the positive aspects of your relationship, so you could nurture His children (your family) in a loving and safe environment. God wants you to be happy in your marriage but when you break the basic rules of behavior it is impossible to have anything but suffering as a result. Do everything in your power to create a happy marital environment.

Naturally there are good causes for divorce.

If one spouse becomes psychologically unstable to the point where they are capable of violence but is not willing to face the reality of their psychological problems, a period of separation only makes sense, and may lead to divorce.

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If one spouse is consistently destructive and refuses to change it is possible the threat of divorce may get them to take responsibility for their actions.

If one spouse hid a very important fact until "later" it is reasonable for the other spouse to consider divorce. There is no reason for instance for a woman to spend the rest of her life with a gay husband. Nor should a man feel obligated to spend the rest of his life with a woman who hid a drug addiction from her husband.

Prior to having children there are a greater number of legitimate causes for a divorce. When couples don't have children yet but have discovered things about their new spouse that are very difficult for them to live with the door to freedom should open much easier. Children are the greatest cause for making your marriage the happiest marriage on Earth. Don't be fooled by those who say the kids will adjust. Regardless of why you get a divorce, whether it's a "legitimate" reason or not, your kids will suffer tremendously. That is why I say it is important to let your children be the inspiration to make your marriage heaven on earth. And don't forget to tell your spouse "I love you."

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One of the things I learned as a single man, when I was thrust into this situation approaching mid-life, was independence. First, I was dependent on others, but slowly out of that time grew a healthy independence.

I eventually learned to not rely on people too much and to do things for and by myself. I then yearned for this independence, at times seeking days alone, where I could independently work on my thoughts and plans and my relationship with God.

I recall at one point going to a monastery and spending a day and a half in a small room fasting and not drinking much water, and just being still, to listen to what God was saying. On other occasions I wandered purposefully through the city I lived in at the time, reading, planning, meditating and just enjoying the signs of life my senses could breathe in.

Independence is not just a single thing, however. Everyone should have a healthy level of independence from other people, so, in their aloneness, they can learn and be the unique 'them' they should become.

And so I can do this independent living thing in married life too. I can do all things through Christ--and the best thing is I only get better and stronger. I've learned that I can apply my single-life philosophy of not needing to rely on anyone in my marriage too; especially in my marriage.

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I can manage whatever household chores come my way--nothing is beyond me. Nothing is 'hers' and not mine. If I'm called to do it, in that moment, I can do it. And I will. If it was just me in any event, that's how it would be... me, alone! Likewise, in planning events and activities, I don't need to assume that others will assist me; great if they can, and if I request it and we agree, great.

But, essentially, it's sweating the small stuff to haggle over menial tasks. As the Brian Adams song, Summer of '69 says, "Ain't no use in complainin' when you got a job to do."

Even in my workplace, I can do things independently if necessary, without complaint. I like teamwork and working with people to a certain extent, but we can't rely on it all the time.

Provided I'm wise and don't get involved in too much or things not appropriate and provided I don't take things for granted and issue grace consistently, I can continue to develop my capacity and capability so I can please God. Independence, like interdependence, can grow without limit.

If we do not deceive ourselves all things are ours (1 Corinthians 3:21-22). God, provisionally, does not limit my activity in this life.

Saying or doing the wrong thing can actually cause your spouse to feel even more distant from you. You can make your spouse fall back in love with you, all over again.

You don't have to worry about whether your spouse is on the brink of asking you for a divorce. You can control the situation and use specific techniques to naturally make them fall hopelessly in love with you.

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