Going through a divorce can leave you feeling unhappy or disconnected with yourself, even hopeless sometimes.

How to raise self esteem after a divorce may not have even crossed your mind yet.

But the main area of your life that is affected is your self esteem. Because self esteem is how you see yourself.

Even though a divorce is between two people, each person’s perception can be totally different.

One may look at a divorce as a powerful self accomplishment. But one may also look at it as a complete personal failure. Shameful almost.

These two different perceptions will have a profoundly different effect on your level of self esteem.

How to raise self esteem after a divorce…

- Admit that you’re hurt, fell ashamed, powerless or whatever feelings you have about the divorce openly and honestly. Don’t hide or mask your true feelings. You can’t fix what you don’t acknowledge.

Let go of all the feelings of blame and resentment. And take full responsibility for you and your life as it is now. Because if you don’t like it you are the only one who can change it. The power to direct your life is in your hands.

- Find someone who has been there and done that but in a positive and powerful way. Someone who has had a real life changing experience before, after and/or during a divorce. Use this person’s strength and words to help get you through with grace and dignity. If you don’t know someone personally ask around. No matter how small or big of a town you live in, someone has a successful divorce story.

Their personal wisdom will help you get through all the challenges and setbacks that come along with a divorce.

- Find a way to release your anger and frustration in a positive way. Physically or verbally releasing your anger will not make you feel good long term. You might feel better for that moment of release but that will soon pass. Then you’ll be left with more anger, frustrations and regret to get rid of.

We’re talking about how to raise your self esteem here so any attempt to put others down to make yourself feel better will not work. This will make you feel a lot worse later on.

My advice would be to find a physical outlet. Like intense aerobics. Kickboxing. Snowboarding or skydiving. Extreme? Yes! Anger and frustration releasing? Yes!

You don’t want to find yourself 5 or 10 years after the divorce still hanging onto the anger, resentment and frustration. This will ware heavy on your heart and your health. It simple isn’t worth it.

Thinking about how to raise your self esteem after a divorce may not be top priority for you right now but believe me it is a necessity that you will have to deal with sooner or later.

Your self esteem level will play a huge role in your life after all the dust settles and you’re left with …you.

Author's Bio: 

Michelle Sears is the author of http://www.selfesteem-building.com and has been actively building her own self esteem for more than 10 years. As a child she did suffer a great deal from low self esteem but was able to look inside herself and create a whole new self image of herself that reflects empowerment, determination and high self esteem. Now she feels personally compelled to help others who suffer with this life shattering issue - low self esteem.