The word "marriage" is so diverse that it is hard to explain its meaning in a single line. When you are in a marital relationship, you are expected to show affection, understanding, compassion, patience, and, above all, love. You can feel that your partner does not understand the needs of this relationship, and you fear that things are going to the outer edge. This is the time when you need to seriously reconsider the steps that can save your marriage. Try to do a bit of work on personal grounds Before jumping into couples counselling or seeking couple therapy. 

How to save my relationship? 

This is a subjective question. No one outside of your marital relationship knows things better than you two. So it is essential to identify what is required to save this relationship before it is too late. With a bit of homework, you can identify the underlying issues in your relationship before anything else. You both can also use a relationship quiz to identify the needs of your partner. Following are some essential tips to save your relationship:

  1. Identify the workable grounds of your marriage.
  2. Always remember the good about your partner.
  3. Bygones are Bygones; you need to accept the past.
  4. You need to be open-minded to accept the needs of your partner.
  5. If you are tired or in bad shape, try to find time for yourself.
  6. Prioritize your relationship.
  7. Identify the things that need help from the experts.
  8. Don't be ashamed of seeking help.

Was I neglected as a child? 

You must be thinking that how on earth your childhood neglect can spoil your marriage. Well, the answer can leave you in surprise. People who are emotionally neglected during their childhood are highly prone to reflect these feelings on their partners during adulthood. Physical abuse during childhood can play a significant role in ruining your marital relationship. It is reported that people who were sexually abused during childhood mostly fail in their marital relationships. Following are the signs of neglected childhood in adults:

  • You don't show the power to rely on others. 
  • It is hard for you to relocate your strengths and weaknesses.
  • You are hard on yourself.
  • You often experience unexplained guilt or shame.
  • It is difficult for you to express your emotions.
  • Sustainability is not your thing. You give up quickly.
  • You have low self-esteem

What's wrong with my relationship?

Only you and your partner can identify the lags in your relationship. Sometimes, the couple finds it hard to go against themselves and accept their own mistakes. At this point, they often seek couple therapy from a psychologist. However, it is not recommended to go for marriage counselling sessions before identifying the individual limiting bias. A relationship quiz will help you to understand the needs and expectations of your partner. A relationship quiz also allows you to determine the potential shortcomings in your marital relationship.

The most common reasons that can hurt a marital relationship are:

  • Self-centeredness
  • Infidelity
  • Denial
  • Abuse
  • Disturbed work-life balance
  • Psychological disorders

Do we have a good relationship?

To analyze the health of your marital relationship, psychologists and marriage counsellors suggest taking the relationship quiz, which can take various shapes. Still, the most essential areas of a relationship quiz are mutual compatibility, understanding towards your partner, your partner's knowledge about your likes/dislikes, and your romantic bonding.  

How can I have a good marriage?

The ultimate sign of an excellent marital relationship is the eternal love between the partners. It is the most vital ingredient required to endure even the scariest storms. The qualities of a good relationship are:

  1. Better understanding towards your partner
  2. Compassion and loyalty
  3. Forgivness and patience
  4. Prioritizing the needs of your partner
  5. Loving unconditionally
  6. Mutual give and take

The list of qualities that make a good relationship can be infinite. However, you should know and work on these critical relationship skills for a happy and healthy marital life. Again relationship quiz can help you in this regard.

Does couples therapy work?

Couples often seek couple therapy to handle the complications in their marital life. However, the concerns towards couple counselling and treatment are also genuine. Most of the time, one or both partners suffer from their own limiting biases. In this case, couple therapy can only aggravate the situation as the partners need to open up in front of each other. Psychologists are more inclined towards individual Counselling for both partners. It is recommended that couples try to solve the matter independently because it is the best way to handle the heat. However, if external assistance is essential, then individual Counselling should be preferred over couple therapy.



Every marriage faces delicate situations where the integrity of the relationship can be challenged. A relationship quiz can help in understanding the fundamental foundations of your marriage. Couple therapy is not effective in reducing the limiting bias so, individual Counselling should be preferred.

Author's Bio: 

Mudassar Hassan brings 6 years of experience in helping grass roots, mid-sized organizations and large institutions strengthen their management and resource generating capacities and effectively plan for the future. He is also a mentor and professional advisor to artists working in all disciplines. He is also the gold medalist from Abbottabad University of Science and Technology in the Bachelors of Sciences of Computer Science