How to Bounce Back After He Starts Dating First

It can feel shocking when the man you were in a long-term relationship with starts dating again, while you are still getting over the loss of the relationship and being alone. It opens up new wounds of betrayal and heartache. Here are some tips on how to handle the challenges of bouncing back after he moves on.

It doesn't mean you were inadequate. One of the hardest things to face is the wondering of what does she have that I didn't question. You start the compare and wonder routine. While this is a natural reaction, it does nothing to build back up yourself-esteem. The better thing to ponder is wow, he can't even be alone by himself, I must have met some deep rooted needs that he can't fulfill alone, so he has to bring in someone else in his life to meet those needs. The fact that he is dating again, is actually a tribute to you and all the good you did for him. So take heart, that its not about you or any inadequacies but it is really about him.

Who said there was a time limit on getting over some one? Here you are still trying to find your equilibrium and he has already latched on to someone new. You've cried more tears that you thought were possible, had marathon talks with your friends, and maybe have had thoughts of dating again, but nothing feels right yet. Just as our bodies are uniquely different so are our emotional responses and the time it takes to heal old wounds. If being alone for a while feels right to you, then make the most of the single life and take the time to embrace and delight in your own company. As long as you are being constructive on redefining your life, leave time lines for the historians among us and move on at your own pace.

Focus on the good things in your life. Although, this is hard to do when you heart has been broken and you are forced to face the unwelcome reality that he is rewriting his own life, take strength from and surround yourself with the positive things in your life. Start a gratitude journal, and reflect on the changes you are going through and how they will make you a stronger person. Take the time to do the things you put off doing when you were a couple that you can now do freely and with no restriction no matter how big or small.

By taking personal action and not letting his choices defeat you and bring you down, you can find ways to bounce back after he starts dating first.