Learning
how to get girls goes further than being aware of the right approaches, opening lines and conversation techinques. You will also have to know how to cope with the first date -- even though this will not be a "date" in the conventional sense, exactly.
You see, when the majority men take a girl out, they follow a standard, conventional game plan: bring her to a movie and maybe dinner as well, spend a bunch of money on her, and act like a well-mannered, innocuous "nice guy" who is looking to earn her approval.
Unsurprisingly, these guys are lucky to even get a quick kiss on the cheek when the date is over. In many cases, the girl will suddenly be "busy" when he tries to call her and set up a second date.
Why is it, then, that so many first dates end in disillusionment? Usually, it's because the man is not able to press her "attraction buttons" and get her interested in him in a way that goes beyond "just being friends".
Bearing this in mind, here are a few suggestions to heighten your chances of success on the first date:
* Keep it low-cost. Don't be the average guy, who thinks he needs to squander money on a fancy dinner in order to make a good impression. This puts you in the wrong position. Maintain the attitude that this is her chance to sell herself to YOU, not the other way around.
A better idea is to bring her for coffee (not at a Starbucks -- find a unique, cozy coffee spot for dates). Or, meet her for a few cocktails. Avoid the predictable locales that everyone knows, and consider "date locations" that will show her you're a guy who is tuned into the awesome "off the radar" spots.
BONUS TACTIC: Make her feel extra special by saying to her, I don't normally bring people here -- this is like my sanctuary, where I go to relax. But I thought you might like it."
* Have a backup plan. The date spot you’ve chosen could be closed for the night, her ex-boyfriend might work there -- you just never know. You should have a second date spot ready to bring her to at a moment’s notice. The Alpha Male is a man of action, and always has a complete plan.
* You should plan to keep this first date brief. For a first meeting, 1-2 hours is usually perfect. You want an escape hatch in case she doesn’t meet your standards. (Never plan some all-day activity with a woman until you're confident you want to spend that much time with her.)
Unless you're confident that you can take her home at the end of the night, it's better to cut things short and create the sense that your time is precious and limited.
YOU should be the one to decide when the date ends. ("Well I've got a huge day tomorrow, I need to be up bright and early...we'll have to do this again soon.") Don’t stretch things out so that she's the one checking her watch and saying to you she has to be going.
End the date on a high point, before things start winding down, and plan on sealing the deal the next time you hang out with her. (As the biggest entertainers in showbiz say, you should always "leave them wanting more.)
* Show up on time. Don't try to be "fashionably late." (This is something women do, not men.) Know how to get to the date spot, and get there a few minutes early so that you are completely prepared and pick a good place to sit.
* Always dress appropriately, depending on the location. It's always better to be a little overdressed than underdressed. You can be sure she's going to dress her best for the date. She'll feel uncomfortable if you show up wearing a tee-shirt and shorts.
* You want to encourage her to do most of the talking. This means asking cool, strategic questions that encourage her to share interesting details about herself -- such as her passions, goals and interests. Don't try to tell her your entire life story in the first hour. Maintain a sense of mystery and "leave her wanting more."
The bottom line is, you want to keep the "spotlight" on her. The more details she shares with you, and the more you seem to connect with what she is saying, the more it feels to her like a bond is building.
(But of course, you're not just going to sit there and agree with absolutely everything she talks about. You'll also use our "teases" and "push-pull" tactics to show her that you're a playful, confident guy who isn't easily impressed.)
These tactics elevate you beyond the normal dude, who approaches every first date as if he is trying out for the position of her future husband.
Much of this same advice is applicable to when you are learning
how to meet girls. During that first encounter, it's just as important to maintain a sense of mystery and pose compelling questions for HER to answer.
Keep in mind, learning
how to get girls is a process. Fortunately, it's a process that any guy can become proficient at when he learns the right tactics.