Husband Doesn't Turn Me On Anymore: Not Turned On By My Husband - What To Do If You Have Fallen Out Of Love With Your Husband

Can you love your husband again if you've fallen out of love with him? Many women ask this exact question each and every day when they find themselves married to a man they are no longer in love with. Feelings shift over time and with the pressures of marriage, the dynamic of a relationship can change. A woman can still love her husband but those romantic feelings she once had for him can disappear. You can recapture that romance and passion if your goal is to save your marriage and keep your family intact.

If you're wondering can you love your husband again consider the fact that at one point you loved him so much that you intended on spending the rest of your life with him. Reclaiming those feelings should be your goal if you want to save the relationship and to do that you need to start seeing him through the same eyes you did back then. Life's pressures have a way of distorting how we view things and you may have let resentment and anger cloud your perception of your husband. Make a point of focusing on those qualities about him that you find most appealing. Don't get lost in the small things that he does that irritate you. It's those small things that can eventually add up and impact your feelings.

You must also make a real effort to spend time alone with your husband. There is obviously a big difference between being husband and wife and being co-parents. If you allow your children to come between you and your spouse the love that you two feel for each other is going to be overshadowed. Let someone else tend to the kids while you two have some time alone. This may mean a weekend getaway or even just an evening picnic at a local park. You really just need to set aside time for the two of you so you can get to know the man you married all over again.

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Practicing in building relationship skills for marriage, especially if you are already married, is essential to making a successful marriage last a lifetime. Everyone dreams of having a lifelong partner until they leave this earth. Just like everything else in life, this requires a certain level of commitment and a lot of work. If you put in the time to learn relationship skills, will be awarded with a long and happy life with a wonderful partner. There are five relationship skills you can start implementing right away to make your marriage better.

You should always look for the good in your spouse. At least once or twice a day, you need to point out something you really love about your husband or wife. Make this a rule of thumb, you need to say twice as many positive things to your wife or husband as you do negative. You really need to eliminate negative altogether if you want a happy and successful relationship.

Do not try and pretend your husband or wife is a mind reader. This is one problem many couples have and is quite silly. If your husband does not know you want him to do something, you will need to explain it to him. I understand women enjoy a man, who is thoughtful, but this is a skill that men have to learn and it takes time to build. Make sure to explain to your significant other what it is that you want and when you want.

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You need to understand the difference between listening and comprehending. Your husband or wife can listen to every single word you say, but not comprehend one of them. Truly listening to your spouse and what they have to say comprehends. Judging or ignoring what your spouse is saying to you is just listening. To have a happy and successful relationship, you must comprehend what your mother says to you. Pay attention to them.

Choose what you are going to say very carefully and pick the right time to say it. If your spouse has come home from a long day of work and is very stressed, this is probably not the best time to present your case to them. Wait until the weekend or a day that is not so stressful. Timing is almost everything when it comes to words. Your significant other must be in a wonderful and happy mood to have serious discussions.

The last thing to keep in mind is to never try and punish or get even with your mate. This is childish behavior and not acceptable in adulthood. Everything you do must be beneficial to the relationship and genuinely trying to help one another. Create win-win situations in all of your relationships throughout life.

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"The hunger for love is much more difficult to remove than the hunger for bread."

- Mother Teresa

If you're reading this article, then you're probably trying to improve or mend your relationship and rekindle the love you once had. Many conflicts arise because we share and give love in different ways. To deeply connect with one another we must understand each other's needs and learn how to fulfill them.

Dr. Gary Chapman has found five different patterns through which people share their love: quality time, words of affirmation, gifts, acts of service and physical touch. If you express love in a way your spouse doesn't understand, they will not e aware of your feelings at all. It's simple: you're speaking different love languages!

What Are The Five Love Languages?

Your challenge is to discover your partner's love language and know what acts of love they most appreciate and need. Once you do that, you will have found the key to a long-lasting and loving relationship.

The five love languages are:

1. Words of Affirmation.

"I can live for two months on a good compliment ", Mark Twain said. Compliments are powerful love indicators. Also, encouragements inspire people and give them a confidence boost. Once you start seeing the world trough your partner's eyes you can give compliments and encouragements whenever they need it.

2. Quality Time.

Togetherness is all about being close to your partner and giving them your whole attention (not lying on the couch watching TV together). It means that you are doing something together and you are giving your spouse undivided attention.

Quality time also includes a good conversation where you share experiences, feelings and desires in a friendly, uninterrupted way.Maintain eye contact when your spouse is talking and observe their feelings throughout the conversation and by all means, refuse to interrupt them.

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3. Receiving Gifts.

Someone who speaks this love language will always appreciate gifts, no matter how small. A gift is a symbol of the love you have for them and has tremendous emotional value. Make a list of all the gifts your spouse has expressed excitement about receiving and don't wait for a special occasion, surprise them with a little something every time you get the chance.

The gift of self is also very important and being there when someone really needs you speaks clearly to them of your love and support.

4. Acts of Service.

This love language is about doing things you know your spouse would like you to do. It refers to the nice things that you can do to please them, whether it's doing the groceries or helping them with their work.

5. Physical Touch.

We all love to be hugged and cuddled every once in a while. Physical touch is a basic expression of love and holding hands, kissing, hugging, rubbing each other's back, and sexual intimacy are all ways of expressing emotional love. Touch receptors are located all over the body, so lovingly touching your spouse just about anywhere on the body is a powerful expression of love.

Discover Your Own Love Language

Do you know what your primary love language is? Here are three questions to help you discover what makes you feel most loved and appreciated:

- What does your spouse do or not do that hurts you most deeply?

The opposite of what upsets you the most is most likely your love language.

- What do you most frequently ask your partner to do?

The thing you most often request is probably the thing that would make you feel most loved and appreciated.

- How do you typically express love to your spouse?

Your way of expressing love may be the same way that would also make you feel loved.

Final Thoughts...

We all have different values and the way we show our love differs from person to person. These tips are supposed to help you understand your partner's way of expressing love and to improve your relationship. I suggest you even ask your spouse, "Could you give me an idea or one thing that I could do that would make me a better wife or husband?"

When you know what language you need spoken to you and what your spouse's language is, you can both fill each other's love tanks so your emotional wellbeing is balanced. Forget about situations can where one of you may feel unloved, taken for granted or misunderstood.

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Women have been saying it for decades, but men have not wanted to hear it; the recipe to a happy marriage is doing the dishes together!

Joking aside, research has now shown that couples who share household chores are happier than those who don't.

According to new research by Canadian academics following a study by the British Economic and Social Research Council in 2006, couples where one is the breadwinner and the other a home maker are unhappier than couples who both work and share the domestic workload. Neither partner should do more than 60% of childcare and household chores in order to have a happy marriage, research reveals.

These results will be shocking to many, especially the older generations, as they are contrary to what many thought; that the "traditional family" in which the husband goes to work and the wife stays at home to bring up the children and do all the housework was the ideal set up for a happy marriage and a happy home.

A working husband and a stay at home wife, puts the husband under tremendous pressure to provide and leaves the wife feeling unfulfilled at not contributing more financially. It also makes her feel more vulnerable and she fears ending up on her own.

A family where the woman works and her spouse stays at home is also problematic, as it results in him feeling unhappy and unhealthy and her feeling stressed.

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It also shows that women who are the breadwinners and do the majority of the household chores are stressed and have low levels of satisfaction and those men who are the breadwinners but also do the majority of the chores suffer from poor health.

Research also shows that couple whom both work, share equally unpaid work and don't have children, or have older children who do not need constant care are happiest.

When couple do things in common, it creates a bond that brings them closer together, assists in communication, emotional warmth as well as trust.

So the moral of this report is, sharing every household responsibility is a recipe for a happy marriage and a happy marriage contributes in a big way to a happy home.

Saying or doing the wrong thing can actually cause your spouse to feel even more distant from you. You can make your spouse fall back in love with you, all over again.

You don't have to worry about whether your spouse is on the brink of asking you for a divorce. You can control the situation and use specific techniques to naturally make them fall hopelessly in love with you.

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