Husband Says He Wants A Divorce But Hasn't Filed: Husband Left But Won't File For Divorce

I have a blog in which I share how, with a bit of hard work and good luck, I was able to save my marriage and thwart my husband's attempts at a divorce. My husband was dead set on splitting up and was just not interested in anything I had to say regarding preserving our marriage. This story seems to strike a cord with women, because I so often get comments and emails from wives who tell me that they found me because they desperately want to know how to respond to their husband's request for a divorce. They can't concentrate on legal issues or worry about getting an attorney, because they don't want this divorce, and more than anything else, they want to save their marriage and put a stop to this whole downward spiral.

I can completely identify, as I was in this same place a few years ago. I tried every trick in the book to get my husband to change his mind about the divorce. I tired to call his bluff. I tried to play hard ball. I tried to shower him with attention and affection - and none of it worked, but here's what finally did.

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Why What You're Doing Now To Change His Mind About The Divorce Probably Isn't Working: Husband's hate to feel that they are being manipulated. If you are at a point where your husband wants a divorce, then this was probably not a split second decision that happened over night. There have probably been a lot of issues that were brushed over, hurts that were never healed, promises that were not kept, and attempts of reconciliation that have repeatedly failed. You husband likely feels that your marriage is at the point of no return and there's nothing that can be done to change or rescue things.

So, when you come in all full of promises and plans as to why this time is going to really be different, or if you argue and try to convince your husband why he is wrong, he's only going to dig in his heels, determined and convinced that there's no good reason to change his mind. In not so many words, you're communicating to him that he's dead wrong, being selfish, and causing a great deal of problems and pain for all involved. So, he's on the offensive, and as a defense mechanism, he's tuning you out.

This is obviously a major problem. You'll never be able to get him on board with saving the marriage if he won't listen to you or give you the time of day. But, please resist the urge to pull out all of the stops and act desperate or panicked. Don't follow him around, beg him, engage him, threaten him, or participate in any behaviors that are just going to confirm to him that negative things happen every time you are around. You want him to think positive thoughts when he thinks of and interacts with you. So, here's how to reverse this trend.

Validate Your Husband And Jump On His Side: As long as the two of you are on opposing sides, your husband is going to do everything possible to emerge the winner. No one likes to lose. So, you have to set this up where no one is going to be the loser. You have to "side" with your husband and agree with him - (or at least make him think you are). Of course, you know your husband best and you should use your own words, but it goes something like this.

What if your spouse don't love you anymore? Here's how to get them addicted to you like when you fell in love for the first time

The next time you interact with your husband, tell him that you have been thinking about your situation and you now agree with him. Yes, the marriage is in a grave place. Tell him that this hurts you deeply because he remains the most important person in your life. Assure him that you are finished participating in negative interactions and want to concentrate on improving your interactions, no matter where the relationship is going. Tell him that you're no longer going to engage him or try to change his mind.

Your husband will not believe this, probably. He's going to think this is another ploy on your part, but when you make good on it, over and over again, he's going to be disarmed and see that you're telling the truth. Then, the tension will diminish like a popped balloon and he'll have no reason to avoid you anymore - and this is when things will start to get easier.

Don't Rush Things. Let Him Be The One To Call The Divorce Off: Now, if you pull this off right, you'll usually find yourself in a little better position. The tension will start to fade and you'll find that your husband is a little more receptive to you because he no longer sees you as a threat. But, even if you are experiencing little victories, you must move slowly. You can never allow your husband to suspect that you are really trying to change his mind and the outcome. You want to keep busy, see friends, and do the things that put a smile on your face.

What you're doing is showing your husband that you are still the exciting, busy, vibrant, woman he first fell in love with. Take the time to remember who this woman really is. I'd bet that she's not clingy, threatening, or the walking wounded. She's likely happy, upbeat, open hearted, and easy to be around. You want him to want more of her. So she (you) should not be the one to initiate anything with him. Let him be the aggressor, because this puts you back on equal ground. The best case scenario is that you show him the woman he fell in love with, he wants more of her, and you continue to move slowly.

In the end, what you're doing is showing, (not telling him - because he is not going to believe you anyway) that things really can and have changed. Never hurt your progress by asking for reassurance, commitments, or a definition of your relationship too soon. If you continue to move slowly, you'll get these things eventually, but you don't want to scared him off and waste all of your hard work by pushing too hard.

Pay Close Attention Here-

Now listen carefully! Take 2 minutes to read the next page and you'll discover a stunning trick which will make your spouse love you for the rest of their lives even if they are this close to walking out the door. There is a set of easy to follow psychological tricks which will save your marriage and get you back to that place you once were - in love, committed and excited about the future - within a few days guaranteed. I strongly urge you to read everything on the next page before it's too late and time runs out- Click Here

All marriages start off good and then eventually problems start showing themselves and a good marriage can quickly turn bad if you let it. The number of different problems that can turn a marriage bad are many, but two of the most common marriage problems are financial issues and not enough or no sexual activity.

Just about every marriage has experienced one or both of these 2 problems. These are 2 of the most common problems that have many married couples asking themselves how can I save my marriage. To save your marriage from these problems you have to focus your attention on each one individually and find the solution.

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1. Financial Problems: A lot of couples ruin their marriage by fighting over money. Money problems are usually caused by you and your partner's different spending habits. If one of you likes to save money and the other one likes to spend it then you will always bump heads when it comes to finances. To solve this problem you are going to have to sit down and talk about the situation. This talk should be about deciding whether or not you should have a joint account or a separate one. The main objective is to find some sort of clarity when it comes to how your finances will work.

2. Sex Problems: A lot of married couples deal with sex problems and this is usually due to one person in the marriage wanting more or less sex than the other. Solving this problem can be simply done by communicating properly. The two of you should compromise and come up with an agreement that will satisfy the both of you. If you still can't come to an agreement then your next move should be to seek a sex therapist.

Next, click here now to find out why your spouse is lying to you about the reasons they want a divorce. Follow the information step by step and you will discover the truth, cut through the lies and pain, stop divorce dead in its tracks, and rebuild the strong, intimate marriage you've always wanted... even if your spouse doesn't want to!

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Anyone involved in a marriage should know that a strong marriage relationship is something you achieve over time. However, even when you believe your marriage is strong their is still more room for improvement. This brings up the question, how can you improve your marriage relationship?

There are a number of little things you can focus on to improve your marriage relationship but there are 3 rules involved in a marriage that will make a big difference. These rules are unwritten and if you follow them correctly you will improve the relationship of your marriage and make it complete.

1. Love Your Partner Unconditionally: When you love your partner unconditionally it doesn't matter how much money they have, what kind of car they drive, and it doesn't matter what kind of clothes they wear. When you love your partner unconditionally your love for them is deeper than material things. You love them for their heart and for who they are regardless of their faults. This is the type of love that shows you care even when there is no reason to care.

What if your spouse don't love you anymore? Here's how to get them addicted to you like when you fell in love for the first time

2. Affection: Showing off affection is important to improving your marriage relationship because it will bring you closer to your partner and keep the level of passion in the relationship high. It's one thing to say you love your partner but if you are not showing any affection then your relationship will never improve.

3. Sexual Intimacy: To improve your marriage relationship you need to become one with your partner and the best way to do so is through physical sexual intimacy. Fulfilling sexual desires is very important in a marriage so you can keep your marriage relationship fresh and exciting.

These are 3 of the most important rules involved in a marriage. When all 3 of these rules are in effect the relationship of the husband and wife will improve and reach new heights.

Do you want to reawaken a committed and loving relationship in your marriage? There are proven steps that are amazingly powerful that will help you overcome conflicts and breathe life back into your marriage. This is a plan you do not want to pass by. Click here to see the proven steps on how to save your marriage.

Maintaining a good marriage relationship is easy when you first get married. The passion and love you have for each other is strong and your main focus is your significant other.

Unfortunately for some couples, maintaining a good marriage relationship takes some effort and work. It's a lot easier to keep a marriage good than it is to repair a marriage when it goes bad. So it's important for you to develop good habits in the relationship with your spouse inorder to keep your marriage as good as the first day you got married. Take a look at 8 tips that will help you keep a good marriage relationship good.

1. Be The Giver and The Pleaser Sometimes: Instead of wanting things all the time you should make an effort to give something to your spouse every now and then. Even if you don't like some of the activities your spouse participates in you should still join them, because this will please them.

2. Have A Date Night Often: Going on a special date regularly will definitely keep your marriage relationship good. You don't even have to go somewhere fancy either, you can have a romantic date night in your home.

3. Laugh: You should look at laughter like medicine to your relationship. Your marriage relationship will become fun and you will grow closer as a couple once you begin to laugh more.

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4. Listen: One of the most important tips for a good marriage is to listen. When you are listening to your spouse you should be listening actively and get involved with what they are telling you.

5. Support: It's important that you encourage and provide positive support for your spouse. In whatever their doing support them and seek their support.

6. Forgive Them: When you forgive your spouse for something you should mean it.

7. Make Their Birthday Special: You don't have to throw a big birthday bash to show them that you care. You should just try to do something special for them whether big or small.

8. Show Respect: Respect is huge and you should show respect to your spouse at all times whether your alone or in public.

These 8 tips will take some practice to implement them in your marriage properly. With some time and consistency the relationship of your marriage will become much better and more complete.

Saying or doing the wrong thing can actually cause your spouse to feel even more distant from you. You can make your spouse fall back in love with you, all over again.

You don't have to worry about whether your spouse is on the brink of asking you for a divorce. You can control the situation and use specific techniques to naturally make them fall hopelessly in love with you.

Author's Bio: 

Now you can stop your divorce or lover’s rejection...even if your situation seems hopeless! Visit Stop Marriage Divorce

There are specific techniques that will show you exactly what to do and what to say to get your spouse back in your arms- Especially if you are the only one trying... Visit Save The Marriage to find out more.

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