Husband Thinks Of Himself First: How To Deal With A Narcissistic Husband

Do you have a husband who always wants to be in control of everything? If your husband is one of the most self centered persons that you ever met, I am sure he is often unable to understand your thinking. A narcissistic husband does not have patience for almost everything and they have strong self-esteem. They will get angry easily when things are not going accordingly to their ways. For wives that are suffering from unhealthy levels of narcissism such as physical abuse, I would advise you to leave your husband immediately in order not to get hurt and if you are suspecting your husband has Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD), you need to seek some assistance from a mental health professional.

Normally a narcissistic husband will exhibit selfishness, arrogance and confidence. In fact, most of them have high confidence and success in doing things. I believe when you are dating with your husband in the beginning, you are attracted to his determination in achieving goals. However, it is over the time, you find it breathless and tired to deal with a narcissistic husband as he is always trying to manipulate everything.

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When dealing with a narcissistic man, fighting and arguing your rights will not help to make the situation better. They are most afraid of losing and don't ever think you will win by arguing with them. If you start to reason about certain things with them, they will definitely turn around the table and make it sound like you are wrong. The best thing that you can do to narcissistic man, it is to ignore and leave them alone as proving them wrong will only turn them into rage and revengeful.

You need to understand what a narcissist is thinking. Since they can't afford to lose and you want more real love from them, the key thing is to make them believe in you completely and that is to praise them unconditionally. It may sound simple, but it can take some time for you to learn how to praise a narcissist especially when you cannot agree with his thinking and actions. When you start buying trust from a narcissist and he believes you, he will start to appear more "responsible" in wanting to protect you. He probably will begin to start showering you with love unknowingly when he believes it can make him looks more powerful over you as a result of your admiration.

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Although it happens hundreds of times each day, the dissolution of most marriages is something that really didn't need to happen in most cases. The entire process of divorce is a very painful ordeal, especially when deep down inside you still feel the love for your spouse that attracted you to him or her in the first place. Divorce itself probably has more negative impacts on the couple than whatever broke them up in the first place. During a divorce you stand to lose your children, your home, your financial stability, and your self-esteem. If the truth were known, the majority of divorcing couples are actually thinking, "I wish I knew how to save my marriage."

If you're in this situation, what you need is a guide. Sure, you can buy books that give advice on repairing damaged marriages or read up on the subject on the Internet, but don't you think it would be better to talk with someone who really knows what he's talking about? How about if you even got a free half-hour session with the expert so that you could evaluate what the coach has to offer? A service like this offers one-on-one sessions with a licensed marriage coach. Even if you've gone to marriage counselors in the past, you will find that a coach is much better equipped to steer you onto the path towards a healthy marriage.

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You've seen lots of coaches in action during your lifetime, most of them on the sidelines cheering on their teams. Although these guys don't play themselves, they have played in the past and know how to teach their players to play effectively. This is the same principle used in marriage coaching. The problems in your marriage aren't you or your spouse. Instead, they're caused by your lack of knowledge about how to have a successful relationship. A coach will help you develop strategies and coping skills that will help you realize what needs to be done differently.

There's no need to feel ashamed that you weren't able to keep your marriage together on your own. It's a difficult job at best, and when you add children and financial problems into the mix, it can seem like an impossible job. The good news is that you can find the help you need to teach you to "save my marriage"!

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Does your marriage appear to be in jeopardy and you are doing all that you can to save it? Let me tell you what concept I learned to save my marriage that you should be able to apply to your marriage as well: "you can't save a marriage or maintain a healthy one by giving endless self-sacrifice."

What does this mean? It means that you cannot solve all of your problems associated with the marriage by giving the spouse more and more compromises to these problems. It is simply not reliable when your marriage is continuously going downhill. It is possible that this may work if your marriage is somewhat stable despite the fact of a few small fights here and there. However, be sure that you don't do this if your marriage is really in trouble.

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Allow me to explain from my own marriage. My husband told me one day that he wanted to get a divorce and I was completely taken aback by it. The more I tried to talk him out of it, the more I appeared to be begging and trying to find compromises for the situation. The more I begged, the more desperate I seemed to be and my husband only grew more and more fed up with me. My marriage seemed destined to end at that point. However, I was lucky enough to be my mistakes in time.

So take note of what I did wrong and ensure that you do not do them as well. Learn to play the game according to the rules. The whole begging fiasco simply does not work. Your husband or wife would only learn to love you more when you show how much you are worth. Show that you can be independent and not someone to be taken lightly. Remember, people always strive to get the things that they cannot have.

Couples can love one another and yet find themselves drifting apart and headed for a divorce. There are steps you can take, with or without the aid of your spouse to get your marriage back into the loving place it once was.

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Who does not want a happy married and family life? You get married in order to spend the rest of your life as one. There might be a divorce or annulment, but as a couple who promised to love one another, many still pass the hurdles of marital challenges.

If you are going through a phase of difficulties in your marriage, divorce is an option, and so is marriage counseling. There's still a chance for you to have a stronger and healthier marriage. Do not lose hope. You were once in love, and you could still enliven that in love feeling by following some of these simple advices:

• Learn how to forgive.

Forgiveness gives so much emphasis in marriage counseling. If your spouse committed a mistake, keep in mind that it is normal for anyone to do so, including yourself. Do not be too proud that it will become very difficult for you to forgive your spouse.

For the erring spouse, be sincere with your apology and try to understand that if your spouse does not forgive you right away, respect the time and the space being asked from you. To be able to effectively communicate, both have to be in a very calm state to avoid confrontations. Try to understand that there may be some past issues why your spouse find it hard to forgive you right away. Take these issues into consideration and be very understanding.

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• Explore new territories.

Get adventurous which is one of the tips you can learn from a marriage counseling book. Start doing other activities other than the usual stuff you do. Do not be afraid to try other new and exciting activities - like a new hobby or visit a new place. You can become closer again because you can explore unchartered territories together. There is fun in doing something you like with someone whom you promised to love for the rest of your life.

• Spend quality time together.

Have quality time with one another. True, you are both busy with your respective careers, with your children, and with other daily concerns, but always set a time just for the two of you no matter how busy life can be.

The moment you stop being alone together, you start to lose the connection. You begin to drift away from one another because of your busy schedule. Start to make an effort to bring back the regular dates you have been doing when you were still starting with the relationship. For the husbands, court your wife all over again and shower her with some of her favorite things. For the wives, remain attractive for your husbands and include them in the list of your priorities, along with your children.

• Embrace humor.

Find humor in your relationship, as recommended by a marriage counseling book. If you get too serious with the daily grinds in life, you have a tendency to get irritated over mundane things. Just relax and don't take life too seriously. Whether you like it or not, problems do arise, and it's how you cope or face these that will determine as to how strong your marriage could survive.

Now Listen Carefully-

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Author's Bio: 

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Divorce does not have to be your only option. Even if it feels as though your relationship can't be saved because of the ongoing conflicts between you and your spouse, it can be. There are techniques that you can begin using today that will not only stop a divorce, but will help also you build a stronger and more loving marriage.

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