Life Change Lessons : Tools That Can Change Your Life

Valentine’s Day has come and gone. A valentine card may still hold a special corner on the desk, red heart balloons, once so full and expressive are now deflated and droopy (if they’re around at all), magnificent floral bouquets given to loved ones are now wilted and most likely part of a landfill, and See’s has charted the revenue from yet another year of chocolate candy sales. Love was in the air for one national holiday. I trust it will still be in your heart as you greet each of the other 364 days of the year?

There were many events to reflect on as I review the month. Through the miracle of technology and the Internet I listened to six dynamic guest speakers during “Relationship Week”, offered by Ty Bennett one of the leaders in the company of which I am affiliated. The following are some of the highlights from this motivating series and life changing thoughts:

a. Bob Burg wrote four best selling books about being a Go Giver vs a go taker. He spoke of the Law of Value: true worth is determined by how much more you give in value than what you get in payment or profit. “Be involved in people’s lives—be more interested then you are interesting.” This is a natural outcome of listening and asking questions. Bob encouraged his audience to make a conscious effort to be a better person.

b. Kevin Hall, author of Aspire, Discovering Your Purpose Through The Power of Words shared about the word, “genshai,” which means not living small because someone else is. He spoke of the value in spending time with people who see the best in you and who think upward. Who know “the song in your heart, and can sing the words back when you forget.” He spoke of the words, Namaste and empathy and living life with passion and purpose. Awesome book and such a genuinely kind person.

c. Another guest, Dave Blanchard, is the CEO the Og Group, founded on the teachings of Og Mandino, one of the world’s most influential writers. I am honored to call Dave a friend and am deeply touched by his sincere desire to serve. He shared how we can use our dark history to enhance another life, rather than drag it around. Use it as a service to others—to learn that there is purpose to suffering. Dave spoke of the power in listening and waiting for that door to open—that place that is sacred and vulnerable. Listening is a gift – an enormous gift.

d. Mike Robbins wrote a book about authenticity, “Be Yourself, Everyone Is Already Taken.” He spoke about learning who you are through relationship with others. Explored the notion that people want so desperately to be liked by everyone and to be thought of as wonderful. In that quest, we tend to want to change ourself for others—a futile task. Admit your fears—own them and to take action in the face of fear.

There were others during the week who also touched my life with awesome messages. The overall theme for the week is the importance of creating relationship, with service as the agenda, woven with genuine love, caring, and connection at a heart level. Out of that space, providence takes over and anything can emerge.

As February, 2010 is about ready to wrap up I continue to recount the highlights of the month. Another occasion was a birthday party I attended honoring 100 years of life for a relative of my husbands. I was amongst the 130 guests who were greeted at the door by Bea, garbed in her Romanian dress, standing erect and solid as a result of her full life. Her guests came from all aspects of life including men who were POW’s, as was her late husband. I made a point of visiting with them as I table hopped and asked them to pray for Bowe Bergdahl, a resident of our community in Hailey, Idaho, who is still being held prisoner in Afghanistan.

Bea inspired all of us as we learned of her life through the words she wrote and her nephew read. After learning about rivets, she worked at Douglas Aircraft. They wanted to give her a raise of 5 cents an hour when her employer learned that she was leaving to join the WAACS, after WWII was declared in 1941. “No Go,” Bea told them. As a young woman she collected black widow spiders because their webs were very strong and were used for crosshairs on bombsights and periscopes, instead of blond hair, which stretched. Her history is amazing—100 years on the planet. After losing her husband of 57 years of marriage, she figured out why life goes on after a love one passes away. “There is soooo much to do! Although I am legally blind, I still am active doing many things. I go to night school where we do upholstery. I cook, garden, travel and shop.” In her spare time she studies for her bat-mitzvah coming up in March. What a role model she exemplifies with her positive attitude, zest and enthusiasm. I belive it to be an outcome out of a relationship with herself based on self-worth and a positive attitude.

I aspire to live with this lifestyle as I enter into the 47th year of marriage (with the same husband). On the 16ht of the month, Gene and I celebrated forty-six years together of creating memories of joy, heartache, gratitude, humility, introspection, spiritual depth, connection, challenge and lessons to be learned—lots of lessons. It seems like yesterday when we snuggled with our kids on Sunday night to watch Lassie at 7 pm and Wild Kingdom at 730. Life is indeed a school and I’ll always be a student, regardless of the years of formal and informal education. Life consistently provides the most superior school of all—if we allow it to teach us. A consistent opportunity to ask, “How do I change my attitude?” Making life changes can be exciting or scary. Here’s where you get to choose.

As February is a month associated with love, and soon we turn our calendar to March, keep on loving, keep on listening, keep on learning, keep on laughing…keep on being present, keep on trusting, keep on by all means keep on loving yourself.