It is important that women understand a man's love language; so I decided to share some information to assist us ladies in getting some understanding about the bro's. Now mind you I am in no way an expert although I do get asked a lot of relationship/marriage questions. I'm also aware that there are many books and theories on "how to get a man" "how to understand a man" and the list goes on. Sis, I will say this some of the information is healthy but to truly "tap" into a man that must come through your relationship with god first and foremost. See god knows that man's mind, his make-up and his frame and more importantly his spiritual design; and the only true way to have access to this information is through prayer. Too often we want to take the short cuts, i.E. We refuse to be patient and love; then when our relationship/marriage "blows" up then we begin to seek god's face. Let's all learn to approach god first. With that being said let's delve into some information to assist us in "learning that man".
Gary chapman wrote a book called "the five love languages" which I highly recommend. There are five languages and the premise is to address the language of your partner which might not be the same as yours. This is why sometimes when you do something for the other person, there just might be little or total lack of response; i.E. That person's love language is different from what you are portraying to them; and we all have a need to have our love tanks full to continue a loving path. Of course god requires us to love unconditionally, but having a full love tank allows us to continue to express love to the one we love.
The five languages are:
1. Words of affirmation
2.Quality time
3.Receiving gifts
4.Acts of service
5.Physical touch
Within the book there is a short test to teach you what your particular language is; and most of us have a primary and secondary language. I suggest you read the book along with your partner to access some vital information about yourselves. Now mind you if you can not get the other person to read, then the next suggestion is to watch them and pray and ask god for assistance.
Now onto the meatier information...Ladies...We must all understand the next segment! Sis, please be aware that all men have a god-given assignment. As a male friend of mine states, "a man will go after his vision and call regardless if he's single, broke, blind or deaf and a woman can only add or subtract from it." Ultimately it is their choice (the man) to pursue his assignment or not. God created each of us to fulfill mandates for his kingdom. We seem to be close to him as children because children easily hear the voice of god. This is why the scriptures reprimand anyone who chooses to block children from approaching Christ. We are all his "dear children" and should allow our hearts to be easily entreated. However, the problem becomes apparent that as we grow we grow away from him and must decide...On how we live our lives - either for him or for the enemy.
Women were designed to be help meets and can either choose to show strength and assist the man in reaching the full potential of his assignment or be enablers to his choice to live sinfully. Loving him through god is done by having a relationship with god himself. God will show you how to love him. All men have a need to be affirmed regardless of their love language and often look to women for approval; this was god's design. This is why after he does something wonderful and you heartily thank him, you might discover him doing additional things just so he can elicit a thank you and or love from you...Sis...It builds him up! Let me repeat that...It builds a man up when you affirm him! On the other hand for some men if you have a weakness, they might choose to exploit that weakness rather than help you grow. It is a man's job to cover a woman, but many choose weak women to exploit or choose them because they choose not to live up to their potential. Way too many women do not understand that often you are the very ones that can push the man to greatness or weakness based on your behavior. To love a man properly you must have a relationship with god and must choose god...Love is patient, kind...Seeks not its own...The power resides in the one choosing to love...Not the one receiving the love. For god so loved the world he gave.
Far too often when women do not see what they expect out of a relationship they began to tear at the fibers of that same relationship. When they hurt, rather than forgive they strike out and make accusations. They don't understand that often the man can not read their mind and rather than stand in prayer for that same said man they go on the attack and wreak havoc on their own relationship. Alleviation of the negative accusations never crosses their mind...They choose rather to hold onto the grudges and nag. Nagging never changes a situation or behavior. See most men will continue the same behavior until they realize they might experience loss or being uncomfortable on their part - that motivates them to change. But that change either comes from their own desire to do god's will or their help meet assisting them through love and prayer.
Let me repeat this...Sis...You can not change a man only god can!
Lord we ask that you give us increase of wisdom and knowledge in dealing with the men in our lives. Many are hurting through their own varied particular struggles in their lives. Far too often the women put additional pressure on the man not understanding that the very methods they use assist in making that man shut down and move away from the women. God we all need your help, we all need to forgive one another for we are all flawed in some way and none of us are perfect; but give us a desire towards you that we might learn to work out our differences...Teach us how to lay before you and labor for one another in prayer. In Jesus name we ask all of this and more in each of our lives. Amen!
My prayer is you will accomplish all that god intends for you to do in him.
Go in peace and I speak peace and blessings into your life.
Seek to know that you might grow.

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