Molded Clay
By: Patrice Perkins

My title choice, “Molded Clay”, is an analogy. I am using this analogy because in life, we are formed into many different shapes to accommodate life, and at each turn, transformations occur so frequent until your personality or way of living your life reflects what each turn has taught. This signifies learned experience.

In the Beginning:

During the birth process, we are shaped and growing within the birth area. When being brought into the world, you are born to a secure loving environment, hopefully, where you are taught the direction on which your foundation is to be built. These tools need to be encouraged from the very first word. Speaking clearly and concise to your child from the beginning helps to cultivate clear communications. “Goo-goo – Gaga” was never introduced into my son’s environment. I spoke clear language to ensure understanding. Perfect example of what that will do………………

My son at age 3

I was preparing dinner and I asked my son would he prefer Broccoli or green beans for his vegetable? He said to me very clearly and sure – “I prefer broccoli”. I turned and looked at him myself with a smile, and this on my mind, “At 3, he had made a clear sound decision and he totally understood the question”. I was so proud.

My Analysis

Now let’s analyze. Observation has shown me that if there is no foundation taught to adjust or no direction mapped for guidance, it leaves room for error – with no recourse. Without the exposure to ingrained life tools - sharing, being respectful of others, knowing right from wrong, communication, it will be difficult to adjust or find a comfortable place in society for the mechanisms of life. As a child grows from the sandbox to the first day of school, the child is exploring the privilege of spreading his/her wings a bit wider into life and the stage becomes more diverse. Have you, as the parent, considered teaching the child how to adapt to being in the company of others through the course of the day? Exposing him/her to other children, other responsibilities that may take your attention away for a bit? Can they be self-sufficient and content until you are available to them again……answering your phone, the neighbor drops by for a visit or the repairman arrives? Will your child understand that there is a time to get all of their parents’ attention and there are times they have to wait and be patient? Parents, It is YOUR job to implement this behavior.

In the parenting process, parents need to consider options early in their child rearing. That is the most crucial time because you are their only source of interaction at this time in their lives. Just think back to your growing phase. Do you feel that replicating the ideas of your parents and how they raised you are a good source to use to raise your children? Or, would you stand firm and make a change to those ideas that were proven as – “the wrong idea”? In my family, a choice few of us had to decide to make changes to the upcoming generation and ensure they did not grow with the deficiencies, lack of love, insecurity and disloyalty that my generation grew up with.

My Synopsis

………if that mode of child rearing did not help to cultivate your feelings of being loved, secure and confident within yourself, why wouldn’t you, now that YOU have the POWER, make sure your child is molded with the right tools for life?

Author's Bio: 

Good day:

I am a 53 years young single mother, who raised a son and saw him through high school graduation with a 4.0 average. He went on to college with a full scholarship (2007). My career started in the United States Government in 1982:

• US Navy Active Duty – May 12, 1982 – April 20, 1987
• Active duty Reservist – May 1990 – Jan 1996 in Oceana, VA
• Civil Service – Nov 20, 1987 – Oct 1995/Re-entered Federal Government in 1999
• Government contractor - Oct 1995 – Nov 1999

As I am ending my government career within the next 3 years, I am conducting research regarding self-employment. This will allow me the pleasure of utilizing my time for a purpose that is meaningful and rewarding, and will permit a more appealing quality of life. I want to make a positive impact to the world through its people – and I want to have the time to do it.


• Musician: Violin
• Hobbies: The love of music from the 1960’s to present / writing poetry / communing with nature (beach)


• All types of administrative courses that have helped me along in my career
• I was a student at the Columbia School for Broadcasting (I could not complete the course because of financial reasons). My instructors were very excited about my talents, but sadly, I could not finish.


• Compassion for others and the desire to make a difference


• In life, facing trials helps to educate you through the experience
• I was taught to strive to always be the best you can be
• Being involved with all things positive for the well-being of others
• I feel I would have a lot to contribute because of my life’s experiences.

My words of wisdom:

• Loving yourself makes it easy to love others