Mothering With A Map
Written by Colleen Langenfeld
Remember the last vacation you took? You probably planned your trip for weeks, maybe months. You may have consulted guidebooks, planned travel routes, and booked transportation. When the day came to leave on your vacation, you may have experienced a sense of exhilaration, but you weren't worried about where you were going.
You had it all planned out.
Mothering can be like that. As a parent you can develop a road map, a sort of master plan for your family. While there are no guarantees that accompany mothering, you can certainly put your family on solid ground with a well thought-out map.nn-- Family map.
What do you want your family to look like? How will the children be raised? Will someone stay at home to parent? Will you own your business so that the family structure has more flexibility? Does someone need to go back to school in order to improve their earning power so the family can benefit?
Will you live close to extended family? Rural or urban? Do you want your children to experience the world? Are you a family that travels? Plays games? Worships together? Entertains a lot? Is sports-minded?
There are a lot of choices you can make about what you want your family to look like. Putting a map together won't guarantee things will go exactly as you plan, but you'll be surprised how much farther you'll get with a purpose in mind.nn-- Marriage map.
Are you married or partnered? You can map out your relationship. This is crucial to the well-being of any children in your family. Children need stability from their parents and your willingness to put your relationship first with your spouse, to nurture that relationship and energize it with purpose, will go a long ways towards providing the stability your family craves.nn-- Each child needs a map.
Mothering allows you to see inside another human being from the day they're born. As moms, we know our kids better than they know themselves. We have an awesome responsibility to guide our children and help them develop their potential.
There are vital questions for you to answer as a mother. What kind of person do you want your child to be as an adult? Kind? Generous? Compassionate? A strong work ethic? Dependable? Productive? Honest? Joyful? These are all character traits you can nurture in your child as he grows but only if you've given it some upfront consideration.
Next you'll want to consider specific purposes for each child. What are her innate gifts? What are his special abilities? You'll want to discover each child's strengths and weaknesses so you can help him play to his strengths and not let his weaknesses stop him.nn-- A map for mom.
Last but not least is a map for you, mom. You need to plan and discover your own purposes in life. When you grow and develop and nurture yourself you are able to freely give and care for others. Many moms trip over this part of mapping. They have a difficult time seeing themselves with clarity and honesty. They may have difficulty seeing themselves as worthy of the process.
Let me encourage you. As a mom, you are the glue that holds your family together. Rise to the challenge and be a leader in your home. Work with your partner to ensure the stability and integrity of your family. Do whatever it takes to care for yourself so that you can be a reliable and mature person and in turn care for your precious family.
Take a look ahead to the future. Envision your beautiful family. Map out how you will get there. And then enjoy the ride.
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