Moving on After a Tough Breakup

Moving on after a breakup is one of the hardest things to do. Most of the time, it's not something that just happens, but rather something you must will yourself to do. No matter how impossible it may seem, just remember that it will happen; you will move on. All you need is to make slight changes to your lifestyle and give yourself a little time.

First, it's important to shift your focus from your ex or your relationship and instead focus on yourself. This is a time when being a little selfish is not only acceptable, but also necessary. Start doing more things that make you happy. Start a new hobby or rediscover an old one. Try something new that you've always wanted to do. Stay active and let yourself have fun. It's okay to cry about a breakup for a short time, but eventually you have to start living your life again. Happiness is a state of mind, not a destination. The only person who can truly make you happy is yourself, so do whatever it is you need to do to get there. However, I will also say that it is important to commit yourself to something else and not someone else. Diving right into another relationship may help dull the pain, but that's honestly just setting yourself up for more confusion and heartbreak later. To truly get over someone, you need to spend some time on your own. It might be hard, but it will be worth it later.

Aside from treating yourself, another important part of the moving on process is distance, both physical and mental. You do not need to move across the Atlantic Ocean to get over your ex, but you in no way can be best friends with them either. You don't need to avoid seeing him or her altogether, but don't make plans with friends when you know he or she will be there or go to places that you know he or she likes to go. Hang out with your friends who don't know him or her or ask your friends who do know your ex not to bring up the situation. Women love to talk and we love to talk about men, but if you want to move on, you have to stop talking about your ex and dwelling on your breakup. If you or stop talking about him, eventually you will stop thinking about him too. Try to remove anything that makes you think of your ex from your life. For example, don't keep old clothing your ex left behind or gifts he or she gave you. In extreme case, you may want to de-friend him on Facebook, unfollow him on Twitter, and stop reading his or her blogs. Your life will be so much easier if you're not constantly reading about his or her daily activities. Besides, you have your own life to live, right?

Finally, don't look back on everything that happened. Look forward. Don't dwell on the past. Acknowledge it, but then let it go. With each breakup, you are given a new beginning, the opportunity to start over. Don't let it go to waste.