My Husband Doesn't Comfort Me When I'm Upset: My Husband Doesn't Comfort Me When I Cry

You have been married for a while, and have the feeling that your husband isn't interested in you anymore. Your husband doesn't show affection towards you, and to you, he doesn't love you as much as he used to, and this is becoming a real worry to you.

Fist of all, you need to think back to when you and your husband began dating. How was he to you at that time? Was he affectionate? Was he always eager to hug and kiss you, no matter where you were at the time? If he was indeed like this then, then there is a problem, and you should talk to him about it immediately.

There could be a number of things that are really worrying to him, and this would make him become slightly introverted. It could be that he doesn't want to have you worry about his problems. He could very well be shielding you from the worries that he has.

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However, as you are married, you should be able to solve problems together, so talk to him, and find out what is bothering him. Tell him that you have noticed a change in him, and you would really like to help. You might find that he is relieved to be able to talk things over with you, and will really appreciate your concern.

If, when you were first dating, your husband was never really a person who demonstrated his feelings very easily, then this is just his nature, and is why your husband doesn't show affection. It doesn't mean that he is losing interest in you, or that he doesn't love you anymore, he is just like that.

Maybe you have a few problems that are worrying you, and this is making you feel that you need your husband's reassurance. Remember, he doesn't know that anything is bothering you, so if you talk to him, he will realize that you have problems, and will probably try to help you solve them.

Also, if your husband doesn't show you affection due to his nature, and is still doing all the little things for you that he has always done, then you probably don't have anything to worry about. He has his own way of showing you that he loves you and that you're special to him. If these things are still evident in your marriage, let him be himself, and you be yourself, and give him all the love that you have always given him.

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Many wives lament that they do not feel that their husbands truly love them from the heart. Do any of the questions below apply to your situation? Have you ever felt, or, have you been told by your husband that he resents your current marital state? Did you ever feel that you just don't understand why it is so hard for him to utter love expressions to you at times other than when the two of you are being intimate?

Have you ever wondered how you can move him to make you feel more loved. If you answer YES, to either of these questions, I have good news for you! If you are willing, there are some simple, completely practical steps you can take. I will discuss these in a series of articles. This will be Part One.

Why I Can Help You

I am a 55 year-old married father of two married lovely adult daughters. My dear wife and I have been married for more than thirty-six years. Yes, I know. We got married with we were both teenagers. Of course, looking back, we know that was much too young; which is why we insisted that our daughters not marry as teenagers. Frankly, you barely know yourself, let alone knowing a mate!

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I am not a therapist. Neither am I a licensed marriage counselor. Frankly, I do not need to be either to share the benefit of my personal experience. You see, I believe that, just as, only a woman can fully explain how women feel; only a man can fully and genuinely express the feelings of men, in this case, married men. In fact, I have often asked my wife, "what do women see in men anyway?" No, I am not a self-hating male. I'm a realist. Most women simply do not get a 'fair shake' in this male-dominated society; particularly, married women.

If there is one thing I have learned in marriage, it's this: Men and women communicate on entirely different 'wave lengths.' The good news is that, if you are a wife, it's possible to 'adjust your settings for a clearer reception' in a manner of speaking. Here is a first step.

Accept That Your Husband Really Wants to Care (Even if it seems that he doesn't)

What I mean is; just because you haven't seen, or, heard a display of loving affection, doesn't mean he doesn't want to care. Actually, many husbands have difficulty focusing on a single matter that affects the marriage relationship, when he's 'juggling' what he perceives as several important responsibilities that need his attention. Rather than criticize him for failing to 'get it;' first, commend him for his attempt to handle several tasks at one time. Then, simply share HOW the problem you see in the marriage makes YOU feel. Focus on HOW IT MAKES YOU FEEL; not on where he's failing.

Oftentimes, what may appear to be a lack of concern, is actually a difficulty in prioritizing on the part of our husband. When you give him this 'leeway' and share how you feel about the problem, not about his failure, he will love you for it. Go ahead give it a try.

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When two people are starting to get really sick of each other and thinking of calling it quits, the hardest part about contemplating a divorce is when they realize what will happen to their kids. If you now find yourself in a similar situation, try to think things through first when deciding whether to leave your troubled marriage or not.

Sure you may have a litany of reasons why the marriage is not working, but amidst all the complaining and whining, did you ever find yourself thinking about why it should be saved? There really need not be a huge reason for it but as long as you have any reason. Don't you think it is still definitely worth a shot? To help you think things over more clearly, here are things that will help you figure out how to go about saving your marriage.

To help you while you are contemplating how to save a marriage, try to first clear your head of any anger and ill feelings that you may have been harboring towards your spouse. This will help you to better focus on the issues that have been plaguing your union rather than how irritated you are towards your partner. Focus on feelings, not shortcomings. It will be definitely prove to be a whole lot easier for the two of you to work out your problems without all the negativity getting in the way.

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Once you have started talking, make sure that you really do listen to what you partner has to say. Often listening means shutting down the internal voice that always has a quick retort. This way you will be able to see things from his or her perspective as well.

Another thing to keep in mind when it comes to talking about saving your marriage, make sure that when the two of you have finally reached a compromise, you will definitely stick by your promises and always make a conscious effort in working out your problems - together. As two people who are in charge of keeping a family together, you two are partners and should be more open in working out whatever differences that the two of you may have.

Of course, the children should always remain one of your top concerns for keeping the marriage from falling apart but you and your spouse should also sort things out mainly because the two of you still love each other and would want to still honor the commitment to stay together through thick or thin.

While yes, working things out will take a whole lot of effort from both sides, and a change in your relationship might not be simple but if you really truly care for each other and your family, then wouldn't it all be worth it?

Couples can love one another and yet find themselves drifting apart and headed for a divorce. There are steps you can take, with or without the aid of your spouse to get your marriage back into the loving place it once was.

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Most couples, when they have marriage problems, always seem to have one answer: divorce. But I am here to tell you, that you can fix your good marriage and have a better relationship than you ever had. Of course, you will have to put in some work at first. I have five steps that you can use right now to save your marriage.

Step 1

It is important to have good communication. Yes, at this moment you are having problems and the answer seems to be divorce. You have to remember that there is no issue that you can't talk about. I know it is not easy an easy thing to do, but communication is always the key.

Step 2

If you are hurting, the thing that will come to mind first is to hurt back your partner. This kind of thinking does not help you at all - eye for an eye leaves everyone blind. There is something you can do and that is to explain how you feel in teams of "I and me". Instead of shouting, you can say, "I need help with the house work" or "with the kids". You should never accuse and that means no to blaming your spouse and saying things like, "you never help me around the house". Being married means working as a team.

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Step 3

Make sure that you always talk about what is bothering you. You could tell your partner that you feel lonely and ask them to make time for you. You should never accuse. To save your marriage you need to express how you feel and hope that your partner does the same.

Step 4

You could try marriage counseling. What marriage counseling does is teach you the right way to talk to each other and the right way to argue as well. Saving your marriage means that you have to do all you can to make it work. Marriage counseling will help your marriage go a long way.

Step 5

You have to set time to spend together. Make date nights - it is very important that you do this. Spending time together will make you see each other the way you did before the marriage. If you have kids you could have a baby sitter or ask family to help so that you can have some time together. You will need this to save the marriage. Having date nights means that you can relax without your kids there.

Lastly, know that any marriage can be saved from any situation. When your spouse looks determined to divorce, do not let this discourage you. There is always something you can try.

Now Listen Carefully-

Take 2 minutes to visit the next page and you'll discover a stunning trick which will make your spouse love you for the rest of their lives even if they are this close to walking out the door. Yes, you can indeed save your marriage no matter how hopeless the situation seems. Take the right step now and live to enjoy a blissful marriage. I strongly urge you to visit the next page- Click Here

Author's Bio: 

50% of people divorce. Do not be another statistic. You Can Save Your Marriage These powerful techniques will allow you to trust again and ignite the fire and passion back into your relationship. Save Your marriage today! Click Here

Divorce does not have to be your only option. Even if it feels as though your relationship can't be saved because of the ongoing conflicts between you and your spouse, it can be. There are techniques that you can begin using today that will not only stop a divorce, but will help also you build a stronger and more loving marriage.

Do you have a unique situation? Discuss your marriage problems on our forum. We can help you find a great loving relationship! Go to: RelationshipTalkForum.com