My Husband Hates Me but Won't Leave: What You Can Do To Recapture His Heart

My husband said he hates me. Does he really, or was it just words said in a moment of anger? How many times do we say things we don't literally mean but which can be extremely hurtful nonetheless? What brings someone to the point where they feel such frustration and fury that they say such awful things to their partner?

When a couple stops sleeping together, argues all the time and appears to have lost interest in each other, then it seems inevitable that their marriage will end in divorce. This need not necessarily be true however, and many marriages have been brought back from the brink by simply changing attitudes and expectations.

Being subservient to your partner and pleading with them can cause a great deal of damage in any partnership. You lose your dignity and self respect. If you can't respect yourself, how can you expect your partner to do so?

Relying totally on another human being for your happiness is destructive, and will eventually kill any feelings they may have had for you.

If your husband has become distant and aloof, then the time has come to look at your behaviour and see what may have caused it. Do you cling to him too much, do you need his attention all the time, can you make decisions for yourself or do you rely totally upon him?

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On the other hand have you become distant, are you not interested in listening to him any more, do you not bother with yourself, and have the children become your overriding priority to the detriment of your marriage?

Whatever the cause, there is always a way to solve the problem.

A good way to start is to make your lives more interesting. It's easy to settle into the boring routines which can rule our lives. Get dressed up, go out with friends, laugh about stupid things, and be your own person.

An interesting person is someone who indulges in their own pursuits and is cheerful and busy. Not everything has to revolve around the home and children. You are after all a person in your own right, and need to retain a certain amount of independence.

Changing the way you look from time to time can be exciting for your husband. A new hair cut or a different dress style can make all the difference to a failing marriage.

Take an interest in his hobbies or pastimes and indulge in them together. Take up a new interest and meet friends for a night out.

Change the bedroom routine, and give your sex life a boost by dressing for the occasion, and introducing new techniques. Don't leave it to your husband to always be the instigator of a sexual evening together. Tell him how wonderful and strong he is in bed, that's always a good booster for his ego.

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Your marriage is falling apart, and you are completely lost. Marital problems are quite stressful, and are difficult to handle. When you feel as if you are losing the love of your life, you will do anything to keep them, if you only knew how. Here are five tips that will help you to start to save your marriage from divorce.

#1: What are the Problems?

First you must figure out exactly what the problems are. You simply cannot fix anything if you don't know what to fix! Once you understand what the problem is, you will be able to learn how to deal with the situation correctly.

#2: Control Your Emotions

When a marriage is in crisis, the last thing you want to do is add to it by behaving irrational. Desperation and panic cause us to do things we normally would not do. When trying to save your marriage, you HAVE to remain calm. This is the only way you will be able to think clearly enough to get the situation under control.

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#3: Communicate

You both have to learn to communicate with each other, and do it effectively. You must not only listen to each other, but you must also understand what the other person is saying. When you talk to each other about your problems, it eliminates any misunderstandings that may hinder your chances of saving your marriage.

#4: Seek advice from family and friends

Depending on how bad your problems are at the moment, you may want to consider asking advice from an outside source. Start by asking family and friends. Since they are close to the situation, they may see things differently than you do.

They may give you some suggestions for what they see is happening to your marriage, and they can offer advice on how they think you could fix it.

You have to be careful, though, when taking advice for fixing your relationship from family and friends. While their heart is in the right place, they may unintentionally offer the wrong advice, thus causing more marital conflict.

#5: Seek Professional Help

If you still can't find a solution to your marital problems, you may want to look into seeking professional help. This help is available in many forms, from marriage counsellors to ebooks, available online, written by professionals to help couples save their marriage.

Are you tired of living in a relationship in which you feel neglected? Many married people find themselves feeling alone and rejected by their spouse. If you feel taken for granted, there's a way to change that now.

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A spouse may feel that a relationship is so lost that any efforts will produce no results. Divorce can seem like a looming option before you, but, in fact, it's not. If you still love your spouse, and he or she has made it clear that their feelings did change, then you can do a few certain things that ensure that their feelings will resume back to how you would want them. If your spouse wants out, and you want to stay in the relationship, then you need to take certain steps that ensure the continuity of affection, attention, and devotion remain.

Most partners wish they had just let the relationship end naturally instead of making sure that the relationship went on longer by forcing it. Separation is often a key issue and critical issue that can ensure that the relationship has a chance of restarting again at a later date. There will be even more distance created between both parties if one spouse presses for a longer time in the relationship than the other spouse wants. Separation can be the bridge that opens up a new relationship because the time apart can actually give both spouses a reason and an opportunity to re-evaluate, imagine, and miss the relationship that they once had before. Pressing on by begging and complaining is not the right thing to do, even though it is the intuitive thing to do. Sometimes, the counter-intuitive position is the right position.

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The time spent apart during a separation should go toward ensuring that you are better situated on your own feet without relying on your ex. Your ex-spouse will want to see that your life is fine without them or else they will not want to be without you all. No one wants the pressure of being constricted in a relationship in which the other person needs you instead of just wanting you. Everyone wants to feel desired and loved, and no one wants to feel needed. There is nothing more of a turn-off than being needed. The person that wants to get their ex-spouse back should do the counter-intuitive thing and focus on themselves instead of focusing on getting the relationship back together without any work on themselves whatsoever.

Even if both spouses love each other sincerely, at times they might find themselves getting more and more distant from each other and getting close to a divorce. But like me, you too can take some steps into saving your marriage and turning it into a satisfying relationship.

Couples can love one another and yet find themselves drifting apart and headed for a divorce. There are steps you can take, with or without the aid of your spouse to get your marriage back into the loving place it once was.

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Who can help me save my marriage? Many married couples are faced with this question with no one to turn to. Roughly about fifty percent of all marriages end up in divorce. Since we all know that love is not enough to save a dying marriage, here are some tips that can put you on the right track to saving your relationship.

Listen to your spouse and what they are really telling you. An argument is usually a good indicator that your partner is upset and something is just not right. There is always a root cause for the nasty things that were said in the heat of the moment. What were they? Recognize them and try to work the problems out.

Once you figure out the problems then it's time to start apologizing. Some things might have been said that were very painful. We are not trying to find out who was right and who was wrong. Apologizing is nothing more than saying sorry for hurting your significant others feelings. It also does wonders for bringing the marriage closer together.

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Appreciate what your spouse does for you and for the relationship as a whole. People love being recognized and appraised for their contributions. These little things are what they remember. It doesn't have to be monumental, but some small kind word every day can do great things in making someone feel understood and loved.

Mutual respect for each other. The marriage must have respect if there is going to be any kind of long term success. A relationship with no respect can lead to so many problems. Fights, arguments, resentment, bitterness, doubt, infidelity, anger, and hate. Just remember it takes the respect of both parties to make a marriage work. As long as you are willing to put in the commitment, time, and energy backed up with a solid plan, then there should be no problem creating a happy, healthy marriage that will last for years to come.

Now Listen Carefully-

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Author's Bio: 

50% of people divorce. Do not be another statistic. You Can Save Your Marriage These powerful techniques will allow you to trust again and ignite the fire and passion back into your relationship. Save Your marriage today! Click Here

Divorce does not have to be your only option. Even if it feels as though your relationship can't be saved because of the ongoing conflicts between you and your spouse, it can be. There are techniques that you can begin using today that will not only stop a divorce, but will help also you build a stronger and more loving marriage.

Do you have a unique situation? Discuss your marriage problems on our forum. We can help you find a great loving relationship! Go to: RelationshipTalkForum.com