My Husband Is Mad At Me and Won't Talk to Me: He's Giving Me the Silent Treatment Is It Over

Does your husband's heart seem closed to you? Does it seem like he won't let you in or that he might be moving towards a divorce? There are many reasons why this might be the case and the number one reason is probably anger.

When most men become angry they close themselves off towards others and if your marriage is in a bad place there is a good chance that your husband is angry towards you or even someone else. Anger can blind us, impede our ability to see things clearly, or even move towards intimacy. Since Anger is so dangerous in relationships or in marriage it become very important to handle this as well as you can.

Here are a few tips for opening up your husband's heart if he is angry are as follows:

1. Respond softly or tenderly even if he doesn't. By no means should you become a doormat, but it is amazing how a soft response can diffuse a tense moment or an angry person.

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2. Try to understand why your husband is angry. If he will talk to you ask questions and see if you can even paraphrase back what he is frustrated about. You do not have to agree with him but there is something very powerful about being understood.

3. Admit any ways that you have wronged him. There will be a chance for you to share ways he has slighted you, but as you listen be sure to agree with him about any ways that you have wronged him.

4. Ask for forgiveness. If someone is mad the best thing you can do is agree that you have done whatever it is that you have done and ask sincerely for forgiveness. Forgiveness is really tough and although he might say he forgives you it may take a while for him to act as though he really has. Regardless of how he responds you can know that you have done what you can to alleviate his anger and if he chooses to stay that way it is his choice.

5. Make a gesture of love towards him. If you know something he would like to eat, see you wear, a place he would like to go, etc. These things can often be strong signals that you are sorry and want to this relationship to work out.

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A marriage counselor once said - Marriage is the commitment that two individuals promise to one another and the trust they repose on each other. Where there is commitment there is love and respect.

Commitment and Trust are the two pillars of the institution called marriage. To be committed you need to trust. Trustworthiness happens only when there is honesty.. Honesty implies integrity of character.

To be honest you need to be transparent. In other words, you need to bare your soul to your partner. There is no room here for sifting and talking. You will have to talk and thrash out issues to emerge stronger. If there are hidden depths in the marriage it leads to distrust and insecurity. Insecurity breeds lack of commitment.

It is a vicious circle that can drown you. Make a conscious effort to work on your marriage. Vindya Raman, married for 18 years, philosophically states, "Soul mates are not those who are identical. Rather they are from opposite sides of the spectrum who have taken an oath to be committed to each other." She further states there are bound to be ordeals and trying times, but who says the path of love would be easy?

Homo sapiens as a race are needy. They want to belong; they need identity in greater order of things. Which is why we feel - we have emotions - elation, recrimination, remorse, joy, anger - they are ways of expression.

Talking is also one effective way of expression. While we don't hesitate to show our emotions; when it comes to actual talking we shy away. Just like a flower that needs air and water to blossom similarly marriage needs commitment and communication to survive.

Words are powerful in that they can heal as much as hurt. By refusing to communicate we are hurting our other half. The hurt grates and gnaws the other person forcing him or her to retaliate and then the whole situation spirals out of control.

Be kind in words. My aunt once said, "When you compliment do so generously." Everybody wants recognition; they would love to be complimented. When you can offer motivation unhesitatingly in workplace, what hinders you in the home front?

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Sanjay and Sanjana are married for 10 years now and have one son aged eight. Things started going downhill from the first month of their marriage due to various factors the most crucial being in-laws being difficult. Subsequently they moved out but they had not resolved the issue. That 'thing' lay between them unspoken, gradually it became cloak that wound them tight. It became the crux for their differences. Sanjana wanted to talk to resolve the differences. Sanjay preferred not to talk about 'things of the past'.

This became the bone of contention driving them apart. Lack of communication has now put them on opposing sides with their child be caught in the middle. The child caught in the crossfire manifests aggression and behavioral problems.

Most counselors recommend the following steps for a strong marriage

1. Your relationship comes first. Prioritize. Don't put your most loved ones on the backseat of your life. Don't take them for granted.

2. Do couples' things together that goes beyond sex. Join a fun class together. Surprise by taking off midweek for just the two of you.

3. Talk sweet nothings. Reminisce the good old times of dating and courtship or engagement. There always a feeling of romance about the past. It reinforces your best period together.

4. Fight and thrash out the issue. Let the can of worms open up. Then make-up. Everybody knows make up sex can work wonders for the relationship. When you are pitted against the other it exposes each other's vulnerability. By coming together you are reaffirming your commitment to each other thereby bonding stronger.

5. Be brave and apologize. Kick the ego on the butt if it creeps between you two.

Remember, no matter how much you care for your plant of life there is still bound to be weeds of distrust and misgivings. Weed out the negative emotions and let your love have fresh air of trust, transparency, commitment and communication. Then the fragrance will engulf the whole family in love, joy and happiness.

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First of all, it is important to establish the nature of the secret and the number of people who may give you away. Perhaps it is something about your family's condition or about your past.

Your family's condition should not matter for your spouse, as he or she should be in love with you, no matter how rich or poor, how highly educated or how rough. As for your past, it is part of who you are, and the more lies you wave, the more difficult it will be to be yourself.

Perhaps you made mistakes, perhaps you did some horrible things, but it is better to lay them upfront than to have them reach the surface sometimes later, when your spouse will feel that your whole marriage has been based on lies.

Then, perhaps the secret is more recent and would affect your relationship. But what if it does get out? What if someone shouts it to your spouse's face one day? Perhaps you cheated on him or her, perhaps you lied about something really important. Don't you think that it would be better for him or her to learn the truth from you?

No one is saying that it will be easy, but honesty is the best policy, and any advice on marriage worth following will sustain this, because, if your spouse finds out the truth from someone else, he or she will never forgive you.

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Of course, you do have to find a way to make things less serious, to present them in a brighter light, and it is important that you find the right moment to reveal them. It should not happen when your spouse is sad or overwhelmed by problems, when you are in a hurry to get somewhere, when your kids, friends or relatives are around and you cannot discuss things freely.

Then, as soon as the truth reaches the surface, it is important that you give your spouse some space to assimilate it, to find the strength to deal with it. You should not leave or give up asking for forgiveness, but rather be supportive, understanding and wait for his or her decision.

Most probably, if what you have been hiding is serious, your spouse will not find it easy to forgive you. He or she may want that you break up, but that does not mean you should give up trying. Just as you kept that secret for a long time, you should keep fighting to get him or her back for at least just as long.

After all, you do not need advice on marriage, but the courage to assume your faults and their consequences, to make things right and to fight for the person you love.

Couples can love one another and yet find themselves drifting apart and headed for a divorce. There are steps you can take, with or without the aid of your spouse to get your marriage back into the loving place it once was.

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I hear many women chanting "I want my husband to love me again" like a refrain. Some of these women have been divorced from their husbands. The divorce might have been initiated by their husbands or by these women themselves. But in many case, after the divorce, many women want to get back with their husbands. I am aware that there are many men wanting to get back with their wives too, after a divorce, but in this article, I am discussing only the problem of women.

There are also many women who are still in marriage echoing the same desire, "I want my husband to love me again." Obviously, these women feel that their husbands do not love them anymore, at least, not as much as they did earlier. Possibly, their marriages are on the verge of collapse and a formal separation is imminent. It is also possible that there will be no separation but the marriage will remain a loveless affair till the end. No woman will like such a situation. Needless to add, no men either.

Is there something you can do to translate your wish, "I want my husband to love me again" into a reality? Yes, there are ways. There are hundreds of ways, some easy to follow, some not so easy to follow, some that will be effective and some that may not be so effective. I will outline a few simple strategies which you can easily implement and see results within a short period.

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1) Show more interest in his activities:
A casual remark positively commenting on his new dress, a helpful suggestion and a loving word can work miracles. You will be surprised to find how much a man craves for his wife's attention. You may not be able to help him. But a few remarks of concern, care and interest can boost his spirits. But don't overdo it. Begin with just one or two casual observations and slowly intensify your interaction. If he does not appear to notice or appreciate your concern in the beginning, don't be discouraged. Wait for a while and you will see results soon.

2) If you have children, it is only natural that you pay more attention to them. Your husband is not incapable of understanding this. Still he may feel neglected. So, show your love and care to him at least now and then. You can also involve him in managing children by seeking his advice and drawing his attention to matters concerning your children. With both of you taking care of the children jointly, there will be no room for him for feeling neglected.

Now Listen Carefully-

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Author's Bio: 

50% of people divorce. Do not be another statistic. You Can Save Your Marriage These powerful techniques will allow you to trust again and ignite the fire and passion back into your relationship. Save Your marriage today! Click Here

Divorce does not have to be your only option. Even if it feels as though your relationship can't be saved because of the ongoing conflicts between you and your spouse, it can be. There are techniques that you can begin using today that will not only stop a divorce, but will help also you build a stronger and more loving marriage.

Do you have a unique situation? Discuss your marriage problems on our forum. We can help you find a great loving relationship! Go to: RelationshipTalkForum.com