My Husband Is Never Satisfied With What He Has: How To Make My Husband Want Me

EXERCISE: MIRRORS AND TEACHERS

1. List problem people:

Make a list of people with whom you have had problems in the recent past. You can use the list from the exercise for reviewing your family map in the last chapter, choose the family members who are still presenting problems, and add to it other people who are difficult, but aren't related.

2. Choose a mirror:

Select one of the most difficult people on the list, and think about your interaction with that person. What do you want from him or her? Do you want to be understood? To be respected? To be left alone? To be appreciated? To be cared about?

3. Relate it to yourself:

Now consider how to give to yourself what you want from the other person. If you want to be left alone, do you leave yourself alone? If you want to be trusted, do you trust yourself? If you want to be heard, do you listen to your own self? If you want to be important, are you important to you?

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4. Change your self-treatment:

Practice treating yourself the way you would want to be treated by the person in question. For example, if you are angry because this person doesn't treat you with respect, consider what it would mean to treat yourself with respect, and change your behavior toward yourself accordingly. If you're upset because the person doesn't listen to you, spend some time every day listening to yourself.

5. Learn new skills:

Think about the dynamics between the difficult person and yourself, and what you need to learn that would improve the relationship. Perhaps you need to learn not to take what is said too seriously. Perhaps you need to learn to set boundaries, or to handle other peoples' anger more effectively. Make a list of new skills you could learn that would improve your ability to deal better with this type of individual. On youf list, note where you think you could learn the skills you need. From a friend? With a therapist? From books? Some of the exercises in the rest of this book may give you what you need.

6. Do your part:

Take responsibility for your part of the relationship. Keeping in mind that no one can struggle with you if you don't struggle back, consider what you need to do to remove yourself from the relationship problem. Remember, no matter what's going on, you have control over your own actions - you can choose not to participate in any situation that is destructive or counter-productive.

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Learning how to save your marriage when your spouse could care less about doing anything can be a hard thing to try and do. A feeling of hopelessness may be overwhelming you to the point where you are absolutely desperate to save the marriage.

That harsh reality is one that many people go through. There are tons of marriages that end because one spouse has completely lost interest in saving it. They have told you and showed you how they no longer want to be married.

This is the person you planned on sharing the rest of your life with, and now they're telling you they don't want to be married anymore? This is most definitely a serious situation that requires you to take the initiative to get the process of saving your marriage started.

The most important things you shouldn't do before you have even started trying to fix things is beg and plead for your spouse to think things over. When you do this, you leave yourself open to submitting yourself to whatever your spouse feels you should change about yourself to fix the marriage.

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This is not what you're supposed to do. You're supposed wait, and then start communicating with each other about the issues that seem to be weighing down the marriage. When you do this you both can make the necessary compromises and commitments to save the marriage.

You meet each other halfway, you don't give in to your spouses wants because they may seriously be unreasonable. Perhaps even selfish. So don't beg or cry when your spouse reveals that they no longer want to be married.

Now, if your spouse says that they need space or time to think, give it to them. By doing this, you give them time to think about how devastating what they told you is. You give them the time to realize that trying to end the marriage could quite honestly destroy the relationship you both have together.

If they can see how wrong and shattering this is, they may want to talk about the marriage instead of wanting to end it. When you show no effort at first in trying to understand what they're thinking at first, this will make your spouse question the reason why you aren't making an effort.

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In today's society it seems like most people have given up on marriage. With the divorce rate spiraling out of control, it doesn't look like there is much hope. However, with the proper tools you can save your marriage from becoming one of those statistics. Marriage doesn't have to be temporary, it can last for years and years if you know how to take care of the relationship and nurture it.

There are certain secrets to saving a marriage that most people should know, but don't. When two people get married they tend to get so involved in other things that they don't spend that crucial time getting to know each other; it's as if at they very moment they get married, they simply relax and give up on trying to keep things alive. Marriages fail for many different reasons, but mostly because the two people involved in the relationship aren't communicating, talking to each other, and sharing what their own personal individual needs are.

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While it's true that when two people get married, in a way they become one, there are still those individual needs that need to be satisfied. Everyone is different and you can't change that by simply getting married. Two people may agree on many things, but are bound to disagree on others. As long as there is a consensus on the critical aspects of the relationship everything will be okay.

To make sure that is the case, you need to talk to your partner as much as possible. Too many couples slip into the comfortable routine of not really speaking to each other, just drifting through their day separately, but in the same house. To avoid this marriage death trap you can sit down and talk about your each of your days were like, using specific details, not simply "good" or "bad". Using one word answers to communicate won't spark any great conversations. You want to build up to sharing your deepest emotions and feelings.

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Has your marriage been having trouble for quite some time now? Do the little disagreements keep escalating as the weeks go by? Do you believe that calling it quits would be better than persisting with a dead marriage? Here's how to know whether calling it quits is the best option for you.

In a marriage, great effort is required from both partners to ensure the marriage can withstand the issues it will come up against. If either you or your partner fails to put in the necessary effort, the marriage will weaken and can easily break. It is worth fighting for a marriage if you have to make some compromises, but there does come a point when it is just time to give up. When you are trapped in a cycle of recurring failures, then calling it quits becomes a better option than trying to battle on until you collapse. Here are some points you should think about before proceed with calling it quits on your marriage.

1. Recurring arguments: When you and your husband continually fight over the same issues, some of them very small, your marriage becomes unhealthy and weak. Your home will be poisoned and you will feel pressure about seeing your partner every evening, as it will just mean more disagreements. When you are no longer able to resolve your arguments, and you are being aggressive or abusive towards one another, then you should consider calling it quits.

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2. Keeping things hidden: Truthfulness in a marriage is essential to keeping your marriage bond strong. You need to share idea, goals, and emotions to work towards strengthening the weaknesses in your partnership. When you start to be secretive around one another and no longer share your thoughts and feelings, as you no longer trust one another, then the marriage breaks down. If trust is nonexistent, then calling it quits on the marriage could be the best idea.

3. Lack of communication: When you have built up feelings of resentment to your partner, this leads to you leaving your partner out of almost all aspects of your life. As the relationship disintegrates, you no longer communicate with each other, and you live each day as though you were by yourself. Your home environment is cold and your marriage stops developing. Persisting with this kind of lonely life will just cause misery. So calling it quits on the marriage could be a good option.

4. Lack of love: Love is the key factor in why you chose to spend your life together with your husband. When the love is gone, then living together becomes pointless. It will serve to make both of you very unhappy. Calling it quits is a more sensible option than continuing to pretend that your marriage is okay.

Saying or doing the wrong thing can actually cause your spouse to feel even more distant from you. You can make your spouse fall back in love with you, all over again.

You don't have to worry about whether your spouse is on the brink of asking you for a divorce. You can control the situation and use specific techniques to naturally make them fall hopelessly in love with you.

Author's Bio: 

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