My Husband Talking To Another Woman About Our Marriage: Coping With Emotional Affairs And Inappropriate Talk

A husband having emotional affair with a colleague at work, an old friend or online does not automatically makes him a cheater. Although emotional affair does not involve sexual or any physical activity, it can be very damaging to marriages.

Emotional affair can ruin a relationship mainly because of trust issues. Deception and lies become a part of your marriage and as a consequence, you will lose faith in your husband. Having emotional affair can also create distance between the spouses because women are very emotionally attached.

Experts say that emotional infidelity is more difficult to prevent and to stop compared to a physical one. If you don't do something about your husband's emotional affair immediately, there is a big possibility that it will lead to a sexual affair. Therefore, it is very important that you confront him as soon as you find out.

Below are tips on what to do if your husband is having an affair:

Make Your Decision - The first thing you must do is to decide whether you want to continue your marriage or not. Think of the consequences and determine if your husband is willing to make up and save your relationship. You must also consider your financial and emotional stability and the future of your children. If you think that he is not willing to let go of the affair or that he has a long history of infidelity, then it is advisable that you move on.

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Fortunately, in most cases, a husband having emotional affair is willing to save the marriage. He loves you and he loves his family. He is just confused or got carried away and all he needs is your comfort.

Talk To Him - The most common reason why a husband gets into an emotional affair is lack of communication. You spend less time talking or hanging out with your husband. Having emotional affair is usually caused by loss of excitement and interaction by not going out on dates or doing the things you usually do on the early part of your relationship.

When you find out that your husband is having an emotional affair, sit down and talk to him about the problem. Tell him that his affair is affecting you and the children. Show that you care and most importantly, tell him that you will not let this thing continue. Find ways that will bring back the joy of your marriage like spending more time with your kids or engaging in activities that you both enjoy.

Marriage Counseling - Couples having a problem with their marriage usually resort to counseling right away. Marriage counseling will cost you a lot of money or you might not be comfortable in attending one but it is a good way to work out the issues of your marriage.

A lot of marriages have been saved because of counseling because the husband having emotional affair can open up and talk about the problem. You will also receive good advices and tips from marriage counselors that are proven to work. Try to convince your husband to attend counseling or other similar programs in your area.

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When infidelity and unfaithfulness invades a marriage, the trust that both parties share is severely bruised and damaged. Trusting your spouse is one the very essential foundations in marriage. Trust is something fragile and delicate. Just like glass, once it is broken and shattered into pieces, trust can be very difficult to mend. When trust seems to fade away, your marriage starts to stand on a shaky ground. Thus, in order to make things work, you should first restore broken trust in marriage.

It can be very hard to restore trust, but it is also something that is not impossible. Trust within marriage can be restored with the help of two elements - action and attitude. Both spouses should adopt and practice these attitudes when trying to work out that trust. If you are the offender, make sure to adopt the attitude of accountability, openness and assurance. Show the attitude of openness by letting your partner ask you questions whenever deemed necessary. It would be healthy for your spouse to ask you about any concern that troubles them and leaves them with those sleepless nights.

Be accountable to your spouse, even if you think that this act seems to inconvenience you. It is vital that you learn to bear with your partner's irritability, frustration and impatience. If you want, you can also have yourselves accountable to not just one another, but to a close friend or relative as well. Having an objective person who remains unbiased can play a huge role in rebuilding the marital trust. As soon as accountability and openness is realized, assurance becomes much easier to achieve.

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Your partner needs to be reassured and drawn away from her doubtful of thoughts of marrying you and your unfaithful acts. These unpleasant thoughts are bound to make your spouse feel vulnerable over and over again. Your spouse may find it very difficult to leave yesterday behind and move on towards the future. Try to be lovingly patient with your spouse. You would desire closure as well, and your spouse likely needs all the assurance she can get.

Forgive thy spouse. Forgiveness is perhaps one of the most difficult things to do when restoring broken trust. Without you letting go of the past and forgiving what your partner has done, trust can never be achieved again. As soon as you learn to forgive your partner, you begin to stop hiding those vulnerable feelings of yours, come out of the whole resentment feeling, and stop looking at your spouse's errors.

Believe in the good things about your spouse. Give your partner the benefit of the doubt and believe in your heart that he/she is still worthy of your trust and love. This doesn't mean tolerating his unfaithful acts but holding on to him, provided that he promises to change and repent of what he did.

Time is something essential and valuable. Every wound takes some time to heal and totally go away. Be patient and religiously wait. A party has been betrayed and is hurting. Your presence alone can prove that you want to restore the broken trust in marriage.

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Divorce is never easy and it is a painful experience to go through. If you want to stop your divorce and save your marriage, you have to get it started by being positive first.

You have to believe that a divorce can be stopped at any point of time even when you are the only one who is trying hard to save your marriage.

Firstly, when you to stop your divorce, never feel afraid that you will lose this marriage. You will likely to beg or show your desperation in wanting to get back with your spouse when you have that kind of fear in losing this marriage. Surround yourself with positive people so that you will not have too much negative thinking.

Secondly, in order to stop your divorce successfully, you need to find out the problems in this marriage. Make some plans to stop the mistakes. It is a fatal mistake not to identify the problems and argue about it. Remember, never try to defend for yourself when you are hearing out the problems from your spouse. Listen and do not be afraid to admit your mistakes.

Thirdly, learn to find out what your spouse wants or needs. Being able to identify what he or she wants will be able to let you answer their needs better. Your spouse will greatly appreciate your understanding towards them and will slowly have a better attitude towards you.

Finally, you can't possibly change your spouse thinking to be exactly like yours. Instead, you should try to accommodate what can be done to make both of you feel better. Express your sincerity to change this marriage and do it patiently. Do not try to force your way out to win them back. When it is done in a right way, you will see improvement in your marriage.

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I was recently approached by a client, who gave me some feedback on my work philosophy. The gist of our conversation revolved around the many roles a wife has to fulfill in her marriage that I was not addressing as a Relationship Coach, and how these roles are just as important, and in some cases, supersedes the main focus of my practice.

I have received this reaction on many an occasion, and most of the women who respond as such are mothers, or in some parts of the world, living in a joint family system. As a wife, I am well aware of the many relationships that stem from a marriage. As a Relationship Coach however, I am well aware that I must master the art of living a good marriage with my husband to ensure that the rest of my relationships are healthy ones as well.

Coming from a middle Eastern background, I am fully aware of how it is to live with the parents, to be a dedicated mother and wife at the same time as working on harmony with the in-laws. Almost all the women who approach me with concerns about their other relationships are forgetting that each relationship that remains on their minds is formed as a result of their marriage to their husbands. Even something as exclusive and cherished as motherhood would be unheard of without the presence of the father in a marriage.

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Consequently, the wife who retorts with a, "You would not know because you are not a mother yourself" is constantly giving herself the impression that mothers are not entitled to good marriages, as is the case with women who live close to their in-laws. During the course of my career, I have seen unhappy married couples without children, and very happy married ones with three generations living under the same roof.

What is the reason behind each?

The couple in a better marriage is living their dream because they choose to focus on the one relationship that started it all. Their inner dialogue and their thoughts are directed on the ways they can enjoy a fulfilling relationship, and so their energies are spent on carrying out their commitments to their spouse.

The women who are exhausting their energies on their children neglect to consider that children are more susceptible to the moods and tones that their parents carry. You may tell yourself that children ought to do as they are told, when in reality what they do the most is that which they observe when you think they are not paying attention.

Own your marriage. That is the root of all the relationships that you nurture, and value as a result. Once you do, you will notice how everything else basks in the calm that you share with your husband.

Saying or doing the wrong thing can actually cause your spouse to feel even more distant from you. You can make your spouse fall back in love with you, all over again.

You don't have to worry about whether your spouse is on the brink of asking you for a divorce. You can control the situation and use specific techniques to naturally make them fall hopelessly in love with you.

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