My Husband's Drinking Is Ruining Our Marriage: How To Talk To Your Husband About His Drinking

As much as men take pride in their habits, there are a lot that we need to change. For instance, men take pride in saying that they are the "hardest" drinkers on this planet. Someone mentions that to a man and they feel like they've won a trophy or a contest. When married men are overweight, they play with their bellies and parade it in front of their children and wives without feeling conscious or whatsoever. But little do we know that some of the most common grounds that women cite as a holding reason for wanting a divorce are the drunken tendencies of their husbands. Yes, that is right. Although it may not hold true for the totality of the population of women in the world and in the USA but it does account for a substantial portion. So if you want to stop your divorce from possibly taking place, you need to show discipline by drinking properly and not erratically.

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Abuse of alcohol has lead towards domestic violence of some kind. Alcohol as we all know it amplifies the personality of anyone. There are those who act like total goofballs when they are intoxicated and there are those who act like cavemen ready to bash anyone. That's why one way to stop your divorce from ever materializing is discipline. You need to control your drinking tendencies. You have every reason in the world to moderate drinking. I mean look at chronic drinkers with their belly bulging. In society, when you look at a man that has a belly resembling that of a nine month old pregnant woman, you think about "overeating" and "drinking". A lack of discipline is always associated with people's view on how you handle yourself. Women always admire men who have discipline and order in their system. It may seem hard at first to contain your urges to drink but think about all the great health benefits it can give you. Drinking too much can lead to halitosis and that may not be appealing to your wife.

Remember that women, whether they are career - oriented or not always look at men as the pillar of their union. The moment a man deteriorates, the wife will always help him. But if there is absence on the part of the husband to help himself, that would cause the wife to lose all respect on him. That can be a ground for divorce.

All that was laid down on this article are just some of the few things that can help stop your divorce from every taking place. Don't stop asking around though. Sometimes the best advices come from the most unexpected resources.

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There is one thing that can truly destroy your life/marriage and that is when you lose those "feelings" of love. Many times when couples file for divorce, the reason cited is "I just don't love my spouse anymore." So what can you do to stop that from happening? Better yet, what can you do to fix it if you already find yourself in that situation? The best thing you can do is to start acting lovingly towards your partner. Does this sound completely crazy? If so, think of it this way: Love is not a feeling, it is an action.

In his book "The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People", Stephen Covey addresses just this thing. If you don't feel in love or affectionate towards your spouse, then simply try being loving and affectionate towards them. You will be amazed at the results. You see, the truth is that feelings generally follow actions, not vice versa. It is a highly effective solution to:

1. Keeping love alive
2. Rekindling feelings you thought were gone.

If you don't believe me, try it for 30 days and see what happens. By try it, I mean give it your all, your 100% effort, weather you want to or not. Test the theory. You will be happy you did.

One of the side effects you will see is not only that your own loving feelings are returning, but also you are helping to ignite the same feelings in your spouse. If you are not the one trying to end the marriage, by loving your spouse, you will be helping to pull them back around towards saving the relationship.

What if your spouse don't love you anymore? Here's how to get them addicted to you like when you fell in love for the first time

Acting lovingly means many things, but here are a few great things to start with:

1. Respond in kind ways, without sarcasm, anger, yelling or disrespect in any way. Simply put, be polite and nice in the words and tone of voice you use. This could be a drastic change if you and your spouse are at the stage of making snide or disrespectful, off hand comments to each other. This will be noticed immediately.

2. Regularly compliment and verbally show your appreciation to your partner. It is easy to point out the negative, so instead, focus on seeing the good, and then share it with them.

3. Listen to your spouse. Focus on them wholeheartedly, will your full attention and really hear what they have to say without formulating your response while they are talking. To go even further, engage them in conversations about themselves. Ask open ended questions and listen. Remember when you first met? This is something you did quite easily, and enjoyed. Bring back that aspect of your relationship, you will be glad you did.

You won't be able to change your feelings by pure force of will, but you can change your behavior. You and only you are responsible for the things you do, say and the way you act. The good news is that often times, changing your behavior is all it takes to bring your feelings around in you, and most likely your spouse as well. Try it...what have you got to lose?

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If you are experiencing turmoil in your marriage or a really bad rough spot, you may consider counseling. While marriage counseling is great for some couples, it might not be the best choice for you. Of course, this is a personal decision, but if marriage counseling is not an option, rest assured that there are others. This article discusses alternatives to marriage counseling and other things that might help you save your marriage.

Join a Group

One thing that might help you and your spouse save your marriage is a group therapy. This is different from marriage counseling because you're able to get input from the entire group of people that you are going to therapy with. Rather than just receiving feedback from one person, you can get several different interpretations and opinions on what is going on in your marriage. You can also have the chance to talk to others who may have more insight than you or may have gone through divorce already.

Another thing to think about is that your spouse may benefit greatly from hearing what people think about his or her behavior. For that matter, you may benefit greatly as well. When someone is outside looking in, sometimes they can see things that we can't see from our own positions. Although some truths may hurt, saving your marriage is definitely worth it. This is a great alternative to marriage counseling and can really help you save your marriage.

What if your spouse already left you? Here's how to get them back.

Find a Great Self-Help Book

There are many different self-help books that have the potential of helping you save your own marriage. One example is the "Men are from Mars; Women are from Venus" book. This booked helped many couples learn how to communicate better, which is a major help for a marriage. You can find many self-help books that might give you insight on how to fix your marriage. Search your local book stores for any great books that might help you out. Also, you can check online for reviews of the book so you can see if it has helped other couples save their marriages or not. Simply search for 'reviews of [title]' and you should have several relevant reviews in your results listings.

Marriage Separation

Another alternative is to take a marriage separation. This basically means that you have a period in which you and your spouse separate and live away from each other so that you can try to sort out your differences in an environment free of hostility. This does not mean that you are divorced and you can definitely return to normal if you are dedicated and committed enough. In fact, some couples who have a separation come back to their marriages and make them even better. Taking a small 'break' from your marriage allows you the chance to reflect on things which you may not think about clearly without the separation. Although this is entirely up to you, it could help you save your marriage.

By using the above tips and suggestions, you can determine the best alternative to marriage counseling so that you can save your marriage and get back to some normalcy in your life. Good luck!

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A part of you dies each time your heart breaks and you give up on love. You need to get your husband back because you love him, and for no other reason. Do not waste you life seeking your husband for reasons you know will end your marriage in the long run. Ask your self what your motive is to be with your husband and if you answer anything other than "because I love him with all my heart" You will only cause yourself further harm in the pursuit of your husband. By simply changing the way you look at your husband you will change the way he sees you.

Do not assume that your husband feels anything but love for you no matter what he may be showing you. When looking into your lovers eyes you are only seeing a reflection of your own love and feelings for him. So if you do not like what you see when looking into your husbands eyes, change the way you look at him and you will find that he is looking at you much differently. Your vision may be clouded by your own mistakes, making it hard to see.

What do I really need to do to make my spouse love me again? Is it possible to build massive attraction in my spouse?

To learn the killer, advanced strategies to save your marriage, simply click here!

Sometimes we will only be able to see the mistakes we make only after we suffer great pain and heart ache. This will color your vision when looking at your husband because your motives may not be quite right. So if your motives are good and your heart is right there is no reason why you will not be able to get your husband back. A part of you dies each time your heart breaks but if you can still feel the love in your heart than it is possible to recover your husband.

It may sound ridiculous to assume that a part of you dies every time your heart breaks or to assume you can recover your husband when I do not know your unique situation. As long as your love is real and your motives are genuine you can fix your marriage because love is the only thing that makes life work. It is by love that we witness miracles in our relationship.

You need to get your husband back for love because the alternative is that a little part of you will die and no one can afford that. This will cause you to be just that much more hard hearted, cold, and numb as you give up in total despair. By changing the way you are looking at your husband will make all the difference in the world. Make certain your motives are right and you will witness a miracle in your own relationship.

Saying or doing the wrong thing can actually cause your spouse to feel even more distant from you. You can make your spouse fall back in love with you, all over again.

You don't have to worry about whether your spouse is on the brink of asking you for a divorce. You can control the situation and use specific techniques to naturally make them fall hopelessly in love with you.

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