Deception...The Whittler of the Soul
Written by Susan Russo
Deception…The Whittler of Your Soulnn“A lie may take care of the present, but it has no future.”n -Author Unknownnn nWhen you find out that someone you love has lied to you, has been deceiving you; it is like a knife piercing your soul. How do you recover from the scars of deception? The surreal feeling that this is a dream is smacked by reality. After you’ve struggled to sleep all night; you wake up to facing the hard truth about these lies. Deception leaves you weak, wounded and wondering how you are going to get through the day.
When you’re partner has taken the trust in the relationship and stomped all over it; how do you get it back? Every time they open their mouth or walk out the door, you question what is really going on. You begin to go back in your memory of the times when things didn’t add up, or things didn’t seem right and you now know why. When dealt the card of “deception” you have to decide if you want to throw in your cards or continue to play the game.
Some people refuse to play with a marked deck. There is no way to win. They cut their losses and move on. As painful as it is to leave; the pain of staying is always staring you in the face. If you choose to continue to stay in the game; every move your partner makes is questioned, you need constant reassurance that they are playing by the rules and you will never really know.
Because deception tears down the foundation of your relationship; every step is a rocky road. You desperately want things to be the way they were; or how you thought they were; but rebuilding that trust on an unstable foundation is risky at best.
Unless this deceptive person is willing to bend over backwards to put your relationship back on track; you might as well throw in the towel right now. If you ever hear the words, “You need to get over it” when you are still reeling from the shock; remind them that it’s their lies and deceit that put you here in the first place and if anyone needs to get over it, it will be them when you walk out the door!
If you decide to leave; at least you can move on knowing that what you are walking away from isn’t what you thought it was. Your heart may be broken now; but in time you will heal and find someone that deserves your trust. If you decide to stay; be prepared for the possibility that you may never fully trust this person again; and, is that really how you want to live your life?
So, once again you are faced with a choice and as you know all of our choices come with consequences. Think this through very carefully. Be honest with yourself as to whether you believe this relationship is worth holding onto; because if you’re not honest about it; in the end, the only person you deceive is yourself.
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