One of the main reasons lots of people never manage to build solid self esteem is that they never manage to determine the real reason behind their lack of self esteem.

After talking to ten people who lack self esteem you will discover that each of them lacks self esteem because of a different reason that's why in order to build self esteem you need to first get to know your specific reasons for lack of self esteem and then work on them.

That's why repeating affirmations and trying to be a positive thinker never works and will never work.

Why do people lack self esteem
In the next few lines i will give you some of the most common reasons for lack of self esteem, if you found that one or more of them represents your case then work on fixing those reasons.

* Self image problems: Why do you think you feel more confident after wearing new clothes? simply because your perception of your self image has changed. Now what if someone was not satisfied with his looks, style or body shape, won't that affect his self esteem? yes that would have a dramatic impact on his self confidence and that's why fixing his self image is the only task that would help him have a higher self esteem

* Lack of skills: If you believe that you don't have enough skills to do a certain task (talk to a stranger for example) you will feel anxious whenever you encounter that task. Since anxiety is usually seen as lack of self confidence feeling anxious during certain situations will deteriorate a person's self esteem

* False perception: People who lack self esteem see things that are never there. They incorrectly interpret people's actions and come up with conclusions such as they don't like me, they hate me or they think that i am worthless. One of the best ways to build self esteem is to learn how to modify your false perception through proper self talk

* Unfavorable comparisons: People who lack self esteem usually make unfavorable comparisons by looking for their weak points and comparing them to others who don't seem to have these similar weak points. If you want to compare yourself to someone else then make sure you compare the whole package and not just your weak points

* Poor past experience: Some people have low self esteem because of poor past experience. Those people have been through certain situations, didn't manage to perform well at them and so ended up with negative beliefs about their abilities and skills. Had those people understood that success is all about failing until they find a way that works they would have never had low self esteem

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