A Self Help Article by Shirley Carton ©


It is easy to lose yourself and your dreams during bleak economic times such as these. Each day the news gives us plenty of reasons to dread the future instead of pursuing our goals and dreams. I say, This is no way to live. You can achieve and fulfill your dreams in any conditions, if you think you can, affirm you can, and believe that you can.

When are we going to be ready to make a commitment to change, and stop making excuses ?

Blaming everyone else for everything. Always Saying, It’s not my fault. When will we be ready to take full responsibility for our own choices and decisions. Change and Growth is more valuable than Gold and Silver.

Cherish the Challenge of Change. It is the very essence of life.

You have inside yourself the power and the ability to change whatever you want.

We change our Clothes and think nothing of it.

We change our Minds and think nothing of it.

We change our Cars, Homes, Friends, and think nothing of it.

Yet there is such resistance in the Word Change. Especially when it comes to changing ourselves.

What would be the ultimate change for you?

Your subconscious mind will do everything, within it’s power to stop you from believing you can improve your life.

Learn how to uncover and eliminate this self-sabotage.

Explore techniques to reprogram the mind.

The brain absolutely controls every thing the body does, especially your health and wellbeing. Everything starts with a thought and thoughts are real forces. Think and speak Health, and Happiness.

If you allow your mind to operate on autopilot, you have programmed it to fail. Change your thoughts and your life will change.

Thoughts should be your servants and serve you well, if they are not dismiss them and replace them with positive, uplifting, contributing, thoughts that will serve you well.

Your words truly are your magic wand. As you speak so it is.

The more powerful and original a mind becomes, the more it will incline towards the religion of Solitude, Peace, and Contentment. It is within this space that your creativity and spirituality emerges.

As we travel on this path of life we need to transcend ethnic, social, and economic times, Enjoying the good time, enduring the hard times and learning life lessons from all the experiences. Moving forward, never staying stuck in the past. planning a better future, taking time to smell the roses, and have a good laugh.
It is not the experiences that matter, It is how we choose to deal with them that matter.

So what would you choose to change about your life?

God grants me the Strength to accept the things I cannot change. The Courage to Change the things that I can and the Power to live a life that matters. We all have both the power and the ability to change.

It is foolish to keep going down the same old road, making the same mistakes repeatedly. If life is not working for you, Stop, Look, Listen, and change your direction. Go Down a Different Road.

Keep on doing wrong things, making wrong Choices and Decisions and you will live your life in constant struggle, stress, and chaos.

Life is a tightrope! Life is a game!

The secret is to learn how to balance it, and play the game of life to win. To learn how to do more good and less bad. The only good things we can take with us when we die are our Good Deeds of Acceptance, Love, Compassion, Kindness, Adoration, Generosity, and Forgiveness.

The people of this world are starving for love and adoration. What are we doing about it? Do we even notice? Are we to selfish? Are we all too busy chasing more material things?

Where are you right now in your humanity?

Is your heart open wide to all mankind?

“Life is not meant for us to arrive at our grave with a pretty well preserved body, but rather to Skid in broadside Yelling, WOW! What a ride.”
Are you enjoying the ride? Do you need to make some Changes?

Start By Doing a Written Self-Observation exercise, and looking deep within yourself for truth, the exercise will awaken and enlighten you. You will see your life as it is, more clearly. You will see what changes you need to make.

How you have developed as a good human being, determines the quality of life we live. This is the Law of Attraction.

Writing gives you another ocean to swim in and writing opens new roads for us to explore. Writing creates a powerful, brilliant, creative, and healing energy.
Writing and Contemplation brings forth the real true truth.

A self-observation exercise, is like a for and against list.

Below I have written a few questions for you to ask yourself for a self-observation challenge.

Write down all your answers, all your thoughts, feelings, beliefs and the things you need or want to change.

• How am I Thinking? Positive or negative.

• How do I Treat People? Kind or Critical.

• Do I Criticize, Gossip, Assume or Judge People? Yes or No.

• Am I Selfish? Yes or No.

• Do I keep my word? Yes or No.

• Am I always truthful? Yes or No.

• Do I react to every little thing. Yes or No.

• Do I have Self-Control? Yes or No.

• Am I Impatient? Yes or No.

• Do I listen to what people say?

Alternatively, Do I always butt in to express my own thoughts and beliefs?

Yes or No.

We have too many talkers and not enough listeners.

• Do things always have to be done my way or no way?

• Do I complain about the way things are done, most of the time?

• Do I assume I know what people want and need, and what is best for them?

• Do I have very high expectations of everyone?

• Do I want everything to be perfect?

Ask yourself, Why? There is much perfection in the imperfections.

• Am I Kind, Compassionate and Loving?

• Am I uplifting, contributing, and praising to people in my choice of words and actions - or am I contaminating?

• Do I look for the good in people - or do I find faults and pick on them?

• Do I appreciate people for who they are? Alternatively, do I try to change them into who I want them to be?

• Do I live my life with integrity, honesty, high morals, values, and principles?

• Do I honour all my commitments and promises?

• Do I Honour myself and Love Myself ?

• Do I mind my own business ?

• Am I opinionated. Do I give my opinion , even when it is not asked for ?

• Do I spread gossip, even when I do not know whether it is true, good, or even useful.

• We base our life on our beliefs, If life is not working for you, you probably have some false beliefs. Question them. How do you know that they are true?

Add up your totals. How many of your answers are positive and How many are negative. Did you have the courage to answer them with total honesty. Write down your results.

When you think about these self-observations, ask yourself one final question, What Changes Do I Need To Make?

Start to change one thought at a time. One word at a time. One habit at a time. One negative action at a time and do not stop until you achieve it. It may be that you use the word Hate, this is a destructive word, every time you say it ,dismiss it and replace it with the word Love. You will see changes very quickly.

Do not let life discourage you. Everyone who got where they are, began where they were ! Think of all the possibilities life has to offer you. Ask yourself, Where do I want to be ten or twenty years from now?

Take a good look at yourself, instead of looking at others. Look for the goodness in your sisters and brothers. Speak words of Love instead of Hate. Take look at yourself and you will find. Your life will CHANGE when you change your mind.

No one is perfect. We are all a work in progress. However, We are all on this earth to grow as high as we can, and become the best person that we can be.

Be a blessing to others and you will be blessed. Live your Life in Amazing Grace.

If you need some, help with direction, at crossroads, procrastination, or living in the past, and do not know where to start.

Start by changing the thoughts that are detrimental to your health, your relationships, and your achievements. Change your thoughts, and your life will change.

When we think thoughts of hate, vengeance, or revenge towards anyone we are preventing the world from operating the way it is meant to work. When we think thoughts of love, peace goodness, acceptance and adoration this contributes to the harmony of the universe enabling it to flow freely and effortlessly. Completely balanced in love and positivity. In harmony, at one with nature.

Learn to speak the positive, uplifting, contributing, language the universe wants to hear.

The opposites of the universal language are.
Love------------ Hate.
Health---------- Sickness.
Happy---------- Depressed.
Contented----- Boredom.
Generous------ Selfish.
Self control---- Reactive.
Thankful------- Ungrateful.
Faith----------- Doubt.
Courage-------- Fear. Etc. Etc. Etc.

Your power to think positive thoughts, Is your power to create and mold the life you want! Write down everything you want in detail.

Do not be fooled into believing that your surface understanding is all there is to know, all truths and all laws have many levels of understanding.
Do not get stuck in the external resistance to CHANGE.

Imagine in your heart, and mind, a world with No Fear. This is the way to Invite and create a world with No Fear.

Live your life in Unconditional Love and everything will fall into place.

The path from the head to the heart is such a short walk, yet it takes some people forever to get there.
Love is the greatest walk. Love is the only reality. Love is all there is
Love heals. Love is the highest characteristic. Love is the highest energy and fastest vibration. The energy of solutions and healings.

Affirm to yourself, I love myself. I am a good person. This action will attract it to you. Plants good seeds and expect them grow.

Affirmations are powerful and they work. An affirmation is a positive statement that you repeat over and over to yourself.

Affirmations put you in the positive energy and space, allowing opportunities to come to you. The power and emotions you give to them will manifest them for you. Write them on cards and put them around your home. Say them all the time. Look in the mirror an say them. Your words truly are your magic wand !

Life is a constant re-adjusting of ourselves. No one is perfect.
We are all a work in progress. Be flexible and open to change. Accept the disappointments and mistakes. They may have happened for a very good reason. We must keep moving forward. Seeking-Searching-Changing- Growing-Working-Trying new things-Learning new things.
Wanting to be better and believing that we can.
Do not be afraid of the hard work and dedication required to win.
Focus on your own journey and your own success, you only have one chance this time around.

Listen to your inner guidance. Whatever you believe that is. Whether it is God, a Gut-feeling, Intuition, Dreams, Visions, Your higher-self, sixth sense, or Faith, in your deepest feelings. We all have an internal guidance system, and we all have the inner power and the ability to connect to it. You may receive a brilliant Idea, or a foreboding of a disaster. Meditation re-awakens your inner guidance system.

You cannot teach a human being anything, You can only help and inspire them to find it deep within themselves.
You cannot change another person. We are here on this earth to take care of our own growth and development. To be the best human being we can possibly become.

We must first become inside, the changes we want to see outside.

Life is to be continuously working on ourselves. We are all rough diamonds that need to be polished.

Oscar Wilde said, “Some of us who are born in a gutter, Choose to look up to the stars.” I choose to shoot for the moon, then if I fall, I will still fall on a star.

Sometimes mother earth or father sky blesses us with a reminder that we are on the right path and that we are truly blessed to be alive.
This is my wish for you.

“Some people see things as they are, and ask WHY ?
I dream of things that never were, and say, Why Not !
(George Bernard Shaw.)

Whatever you Think, and Speak. Enthusiastically, and Diligently, Work upon, with Faith and Belief. Will inevitably happen. Be open to that. I have seen this work many times.

“ The purpose of learning is growth and our minds, unlike our bodies, can continue growing as long as we continue to live.” (Morris Adler)

My passion is to inspire, motivate, educate, and help anyone who may be struggling with life as it is. For them. Please contact me, I want to help you.

Thankyou for giving your precious time to read this article, I am grateful, and I pray that it has inspired you in some small way.
To believe in yourself. To achieve your dreams and to love yourself.

Author's Bio: 

May I suggest that you view my free Video, “Believe in Yourself”
Shirley is a published Author, of Self- Discovery, Books , C.Ds, and Courses. Co-Founder of the Steps Transformation Program.
Inspirational, Motivational and Educational.
Author of the Self- help book. “Discover the Power of Thoughts”.
And Shirley’s latest book. “ Letting Go of the Past – At Last.”
Visit Shirley's website www.stepswa.com.au
Or, www.shirleycarton.com.au
E-mail shirley@stepswa.com.au