Should I Tell Him My Sex History?
Written by Martha Lee, DHS, MA, BA
How much you reveal to your partner has a lot to do with what kind of a relationship you want. If you want an honest and open relationship, then it is important you are as honest and open as you possibly can. Your past is a part of where you have been, and may not be representative of who you are as a person now. If he has difficulties differentiating that, then it might be very telling of his emotional maturity and you might not want to pursue a relationship with such a person anyway.
It is important to decide how much of your past you wish to reveal and at which stage of a relationship. For instance if you have an incurable sexually transmitted infection, do you want him to know or find out later when he catches it too? Whilst it is not necessary to share this on a first date, you might want to tell him before you are in bed together!
Being open and honest does takes courage and emotional strength. Sometimes when you risk it by laying your heart out, you might just be surprised with what you get in return – greater admiration, respect, and intimacy – all of which brings you closer to having the relationship you desire.
Article author
About the Author
Dr. Martha Lee is Founder and Clinical Sexologist of Eros Coaching. She is a certified sexologist with a Doctorate in Human Sexuality. She provides sexuality and intimacy coaching for individuals and couples, conducts sexual education workshops and speaks at public events. For more, visit www.eroscoaching.com or email drmarthalee@eroscoaching.com.
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