is it possible to keep our equilibrium when the world seems to be spinning out of control? Negative news abounds. The airwaves are crowded with messages of turmoil, despair and mental, emotional and spiritual chaos.

A typical day is filled with more interactions with inanimate objects than living, breathing people. We clear our e-mail, check our voice mail, listen to directions that are hidden behind messages to press one for English, press two for the company roster and speak the city and state to a voice activated information system that annoyingly continues to ask that we repeat ourselves two or three times. Add that to junk mail, call waiting, traffic jams, noise pollution, network TV with seven thirty-second commercials in a row that are turned up louder than the show we are watching. Cell-phones with microphones craftily concealed create the weird distraction of seeing the common occurrence of passersby muttering to themselves out loud.

This constant bombardment falls on us like acid rain corroding our basic connection to one another. Simple truths are what get lost amid the anxiety that our technological world produces. Conformity, trivia and dehumanization rob us of the basic nutrients necessary to live with grace and ease.

Our world is hard up for simple things. Things that naturally abound. Exploding sunsets, the sighing of the wind, the chirping of crickets. Beauty. Mystery. Wonder. These are essential truths that connect us, in an age of frightening greed and disregard, to the core of life itself.

“Yes, simple things. Sunsets, walks on the beach, deep loving connection, they are right here on my list of things to do right after my date with Santa Claus, the tooth-fairy and Sponge Bob Square Pants.”

Okay, so it seems hopelessly unrealistic to opt for the harmonious, clear, adventurous and loving side of the street when the climate demands that some hard-line boundaries must be put in place to stop the hemorrhaging of our sacred energy. These energy leaks are created from the psychic bombardment of everyday negative pollutions that threaten to topple our natural balance and equilibrium.

The benefit of intuitive knowledge is that it provides an opportunity to assess the reality that we find ourselves in. The steps necessary to safeguard our creative wellspring reside in the ability to manage our energy.

The permission and commitment to use yes and no beneficially is the first step that puts us on solid ground. Yes is a door opener. Yes allows our energy to transport us out into the world. No is a door closer. No slows down, closes down and shuts down the show. We must establish a strong affinity for right use of both yes and no to manage our multidimensional lives successfully.

Here is a three-word formula for successful self-management. Secure. Stabilize. Stretch. These three S’s supply a perfect guideline for knowing when to say yes and when to say no.

Safety and security means opening some doors, saying yes, while closing others, saying no. Stabilizing requires liberal use of no until we have come back home enough to find our grounding. Stretching requires an opening up again to new experiences and that means the generous and intentional use of yes.

Growth and progress depend mightily on our ability to secure enough information, support and sustenance to create safety. Next comes the ability to be patient and still while we stabilize and then when we are sure-footed we can take the risks required to stretch out of our comfort zone.

The tricky part is the fact that our lives are multifaceted. It takes introspection to discern what areas of our lives are screaming for safety and security while other aspects are closing down from lack of stimulation.

For example, your work life may be filled with new challenges everyday. It is exciting, stimulating, stressful and energy demanding. You are speeding down the fast lane. Your career is in the stretch mode. So much time is devoted to work however, your personal life is non-existent. You may be in danger of being charged rent for the space your clothes are taking up at the cleaners. Personal maintenance like dentist, doctor, haircut, car and house repairs may all be demanding your attention. When you look closely, you find that you are an automatic yes machine when it comes to work and on automatic no regarding the personal.

You are off kilter, out of balance, lopsided, one sided and off course. It will take flexibility, clear intention and awareness to shift back and forth between right use of yes and no.

When you find yourself in the yes mode know that your energy is rushing out fast and furiously. All stretch with no stabilizing ultimately creates insecurity and burnout.

When the underpinnings that create your security base begin to unravel you will be left at the mercy of outside events. Think hummingbird with wings flapping furiously but with no place to land.

Secure. Stabilize. Stretch.

Apply these three S’s to the important areas of your life. Do a needs assessment and then take the right actions necessary to give yourself a firm place to stand. Take ownership of yes and no to solidify your personal reality.

From that secure position you will be ready to spread you wings and fly above the chaos of these troubling times.

Author's Bio: 

Susan McNeal Velasquez writes and produces experiential seminars on the topic of how to Unleash The Power of Your Intuition. Her book BEYOND INTELLECT Journey Into the Wisdom of Your Intuitive Mind is available at For more information visit: and