Remember that old 80’s song with Rockwell and Michael Jackson that said "I always feel like…somebody’s watching me???" Well, if you are one of the millions of people currently going through a divorce, the feeling of someone watching you may ring a little too close for comfort.

Many people believe that if they log into their bank account, credit cards, e-mail accounts, Facebook, etc. that it is secure from anyone else’s eyes because they are protected by passwords. I, like many others, had absolutely no idea that this was not the case. No matter what kind of security the actual website offers (multiple passwords, military grade encryption, etc.) if someone has installed "key logger" software on your computer then all bets are off.

For someone trying to be sneaky, key logger software is usually installed on a home computer that is shared by several people, but if someone has access to your personal computer, then it could be in danger of this software as well. This is becoming more and more common when people are preparing to divorce, if there is a suspicion of infidelity, or just one person simply wanting control of another. Many companies are also installing this software on work computers to see what their employees are doing during work time. This software actually records your username and passwords and can send them to the person responsible for installing it on the computer. It also can take random screen shots of whatever you are surfing/writing as well.

Norton Antivirus and McAfee do not catch all of these software programs, so if you scan your computer with these antivirus programs it may not even recognize the key logger software!

If you are in a situation where you believe that your computer may be compromised then do NOT use that computer. Go to the library, use a friend’s computer or use your cell phone to access your accounts. Change the passwords on each account and do not sign in to those accounts again from your home computer. (Even though you may change the passwords, if you sign in to your computer, the key logger software will record your new passwords.)

I am aware of one woman whose husband installed key logger software on their home computer. They were in the process of separating but neither had moved out of the house yet. He gained access to her Facebook account and wrote some nasty messages for her friends to see. Then he accessed her e-mail accounts and forwarded several of her personal e-mails to himself. (The only way she caught it was that he forgot to delete her "sent" items and she knew SHE hadn’t forwarded any e-mails to him. He may have been sneaky but he certainly wasn’t very smart).

A gentleman was suspicious that his wife was having an affair, so he installed the software on their shared home computer. Within a week he was able to verify that she not only had been carrying on an affair with an online boyfriend, but also had several profiles on and looking for "an honest, caring, friend that could turn into something more serious." Hmmmm. Can you say BUSTED?!?!

Another thing to consider if your computer is compromised – if you store photos or other evidence on your computer that you plan to use during your divorce hearing, your ex can easily delete those even if you have them password protected. In addition, even though they may be in a private folder, those pictures of your last Girls Night Out can be copied and used against YOU if they show you intoxicated or doing anything inappropriate.

Don’t let paranoia and panic set in. Just realize that this kind of intrusion into your cyber world is very much available so be careful what you post...but more important, be careful of where you post it from.

Author's Bio: 

Dana E. McIntyre and her husband created Partner Diary ( after they both realized they needed a place to journal daily events dealing with ex-spouses. After years of research with attorneys and judges alike, they discovered that people going through a divorce or separation had no place to securely document situations regarding their children if they were going through a divorce or child custody case without the possibility of their journal being subpoenaed by opposing counsel.

Her ‘Diary of an Ex-Spouse” has been published numerous times and she continues to develop additional suggestions on how to protect yourself during divorce proceedings. She is also a motivational speaker to women’s groups regarding the importance of daily journaling for court cases.

Dana McIntyre is a busy mother of three kids , wife to a hard working software programmer, and still has time to enjoy two of her favorite activities – camping and triathlons. Born and raised in Atlanta, Dana holds a GA Real Estate License and has extended her sales capabilities by marketing Partner Diary, the most recent software program created by Wink Software.