Speaking into your reality

My friend Matt Waldron, says there are only three times in life when someone has a legitimate place to speak into someone else’s reality:
1. As their parent, while their child is still living at home;
2. As a professional, where someone is paying for their advice;
3. When someone is specifically invited to do so.

Every other instance of telling someone else what you think they need to hear about their life, or speaking directly into their reality is a judgement and is therefore inappropriate no matter how accurate or necessary it may seem to the person delivering it.

There are two main reasons I bring this up. Firstly we would all do well to step back from our need to fix or correct those around us. No matter how clearly you see or how true you feel your opinion is, If the relationship doesn’t meet one of the above three criteria – it’s time to keep your thoughts to your self. This also includes prophetic words. Just because you can see it, doesn’t mean you have permission to say it. Most of the time when we are desperate to tell someone else what they are doing wrong it comes out of the wrong motivation and does more harm than good. So often it is more about serving our own sense of self righteousness than it is about serving the interests of the other person. Jesus tells us to focus on taking the plank out of our own eye before we worry about addressing the speck in our brothers eye. Even with our friends and family we need to ask permission before sharing our insights and be prepared for them to say no.

However, the second and more important reaso
I wanted to talk about this issue today has to do with the importance of giving people permission to speak into your reality.

If you want to grow in life and become the person God created you to be, it will not happen without the love, leadership and wisdom of key people God has strategically placed in our lives.

I’m not suggesting you should allow absolutely anyone to speak into your life, but you must allow someone.
Giving someone you trust that kind of access to the real you creates opportunity for the following things:

Awareness – One of the most limiting things in our lives is our blind spots. If we can’t see it, we can’t touch it and therefore we can’t change. We are all so good at just doing things because that’s what we’ve always done without seeing what lies behind that behaviour that we can’t see.

Great questions - Anthony Robbins says that the quality of our life is determined by the quality of the questions we ask. Having the right person speak into your life will always lead to great questions that cause you to look at things differently.

Accountability - We are all great at justifying our behaviour and perpetuating unhealthy habits and actions even though we really do know it’s wrong. Allowing some to speak into your reality means that you need to stay accountable to the things you say you will do and leaves far less room for justifying wrong behaviour.

Growth - If you are not moving forward and growing in life, you are going backwards. God calls people as leaders to equip those they lead and facilitate their growth towards maturity. If you are unwilling to receive leadership from others and instead prefer to be an independent operator, you cut yourself off from a God ordained flow of life and authority from heaven. If you are receiving leadership from others, in many ways it also qualifies you for God to use you to give leadership to others.

We all need to seek out Godly people who have a measure of wisdom and maturity and in a way submit ourselves to them by allowing them to speak into our reality. Without these kind of relationships we will always stagnate and grow cold.