It is no secret that men and women haven’t always been able to communicate properly. The concepts and ideas that are innate in most women are usually difficult concepts for most men to grasp. By the same token, things that are obvious to men are not easily understood by the majority of women. Because of the different communication styles between men and women, it can be difficult for men and women to maintain a level of understanding and effective communication. Many times this breakdown of communication leads to extreme frustration in relationships because it is so difficult for men and women to get on the same page and have a “normal” conversation. If you want to learn to better communicate with the opposite sex, it is important to understand the difference in communication styles.

Have you ever asked a man to give you details on a particular subject? Have you noticed that he usually has a difficult time recalling the little details that you are craving? However, if you asked a woman to give you details on the same subject, chances are she will still be giving you a very in depth description 30 minutes later. Many times men feel overwhelmed when women give them a ton of “inconsequential” details because they are usually looking for a straight forward and simple answer. The next time you are telling a guy a story, try to give him the bare minimal and see if he asks for more details. Keep in mind that he won’t consider you to be standoffish because of your abbreviated storytelling skills because this is probably the way he would rather hear stories.

From a young age, boys and girls are taught to view feelings and emotions in completely different ways. Boys are encouraged to feel macho and strong, while girls are encouraged to feel sensitive and vulnerable. This is not to say that boys never experience feelings of vulnerability and sensitivity, however, they are taught to ignore those feelings. For this reason, men typically have a difficult time discussing their feelings while maintaining their feelings of masculinity. Many times a great way to discuss “feelings” with a man is to ask him what he “thinks” about a particular situation. This allows him to use his logical side to effectively express his feelings, and he will feel that he just spent the last hour discussing thoughts as opposed to discussing feelings.

When it comes to reaching goals, men typically prefer to reach these goals on their own so they can feel more accomplished. However, women usually desire to reach goals with a friend. Women like the feeling of having a support system to help them when times get tough, and men like to feel that they are being allowed to light the path for a woman they care about. Instead of running the race along with her, they would rather be her support system. You don’t have to pretend that you are completely incapable of doing simple tasks, however, if a man is trying to show you that he cares by blazing the trail for you, don’t deny him the right.

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Author's Bio: 

Lori Pinkerton has made a career out of her passion—helping every woman, no matter who they are, create irresistible connections on their dates and ultimately find the love of their life—just like she did.

Her success caught the eye of TV’s 180 Life and Style Makeovers, a national television show premiering in fall 2010 on the Oxygen channel, and the first show of its kind to account for the whole woman. The producers invited her to share her secrets with America. As the show’s dating and relationships expert, Lori teaches women how to breathe new love into their lives and she helps women create relationships that leave them feeling wanted instead of feeling wanting.

Her proven tools get to the heart of what matters—showing women how to create the dates they dream of and experience an intimacy that most have given up on ever finding.

Lori doesn’t believe in settling—that’s why she took the scary step of leaving an unfulfilling marriage after 23 years. Tired of her depression and unhappiness, she abruptly took her perfectly imperfect life off autopilot.

Raised by nine moms and four dads before the age of ten, Lori spent her young adult life building a castle of stability around herself.

“I grew up very poor. My granny used to say all the time, ‘If we just had money, everything would be great,’” she says. But once Lori reached the top of that castle—surrounded by multiple houses, a successful construction business, and a model family—she looked down and wondered, “Why do I feel so empty? How come I never feel good enough?”

Lori would find an answer in Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP), a tool for re-envisioning herself beyond the self-imposed limits that had kept her confined for so many years. After studying under NLP expert Richard Bandler, she became a certified trainer and began helping others recognize and act on their vast potential in their personal and professional lives. As a business and life coach, she was wildly successful.

But the now-foreign world of dating made her head spin. She admits,“It took me a year after the divorce to even start dating.” Then the idea to use her business and life-coaching experience in her dating hit her like a ton a bricks. She started Get Up and Date to support women in finding quality dates they wanted—and because she understood that settling is too often an easy alternative to fighting for what you want.

This hard-working author, speaker, and coach—who loves to toss back a glass of vodka, will curse with great enthusiasm when necessary, and is about to take up boxing just because she fantasizes about fighting—is a gutsy woman who never wants to be the “guru” of anything. With her innovative process, she teaches women how to grab the advantage in dating, re-discover themselves and their wants, and use that power to date with confidence.

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