The other night a friend from years ago visited. He’s going through hard times and felt down on his luck. I wanted to help so I asked him to tell me his story.

He began by blaming his life’s downturn on the economy. He said outside forces were to blame. He knew all the right things to do, did them, and yet life just threw rocks at him until he broke down.

I listened and decided that to be of the best service to him, I had to put on my ‘tough love’ gloves and be a good coach.

“There are no outside forces,” I declared.

He looked stunned. I guess he was expecting sympathy. I gave it, but didn’t want to leave him there.

He quickly replied with, “Surely there are things that happen outside of your control that cause you to have bad luck.”

“You attract all of it,” I said, speaking as lovingly but directly as I could.

I added, “There are outside elements out there that can serve you or stop you. What you believe inside you is what causes one or the other to come your way. You set up attractor fields in your life. You attract the outside forces to match what you inwardly expect.”

“But how can I attract all of it when I’m thinking all the right things and doing all the right things?”

I then went into my explanation of how we attract based on our unconscious programming, not our conscious thoughts. I pointed out this is my current life work, explained in my recent books and audios, to teach people how they are attracting what they get based on their inner wiring.

Erasing limiting beliefs
My friend just looked at me for a second, trying to comprehend what I was saying. He asked, “But why would I take a life that was truly blossoming and cause it to fall apart? I had everything going for me. I had just moved into a big house. Life was great.”

“I don’t know — as there are numerous beliefs that could cause such a thing — but you know.”

“I do?”

I then asked one of my favorite questions:

“What does this life experience mean to you?”

He didn’t understand.

“The meaning you give an event is the belief that attracted it,” I explained. “How do you describe what happened to you?”

“As bad.”

“I know that’s how you see it, but what does it mean that this happened?”

He didn’t know.

I decided to try a different approach. I sat with him, doing my loving coaching, being patient, and explained that at some point early on there was probably a shift in his perception, beliefs or life experience. I asked him to tell me about it.

He was quiet for a while. He reflected and slowly said, “I remember sitting in my new home and thinking my life is so wonderful, that I don’t want to lose all I had created. I was then driven to not lose it all.”

“There it is,” I said. “You were driven by the fear of loss. A part of you didn’t want to lose your good fortune. The thing is, we attract what we love and what we fear. That’s where all the emotion is, which fuels the attractor fields. You attracted the very thing you feared.”

We attract what we love and what we fear.

He allowed that insight to sink in.

“So I set all this up?” he asked. “I did all of this to myself?”

“We all do it,” I explained. “We are unconscious beings here to awaken. These harder life experiences are often there to jolt us awake. No one is to blame. It’s about taking responsibility.”

“But what if I do it again?”

“When you get the lesson, you no longer need the experience,” I said, using one of the popular lines from my book, The Attractor Factor. “You won’t do it again.”

“When you get the lesson, you no longer need the experience.”

We talked for a while longer. He was visibly more relaxed. He thanked me for spending such personal time with him and said he didn’t have people like me to talk to where he lived. I explained that I created Miracles Coaching for that precise reason.

“My own life didn’t transform until I worked with a coach,” I told him. “And that’s why I created Miracles Coaching; to help others.”

The point is, we are unconscious to the drivers in our mind that attract the outside forces we blame for our circumstances.

“Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.” — C.G. Jung

The field of neuroscience helps prove that fact. You don’t see all of reality. Your brain filters what you see based on your unconscious expectations. You see what you are programmed to see by your beliefs. The outer world is a mirror of your inner world.

If you expect outside forces to help you, you’ll see opportunities.

If you expect outside forces to harm you, you’ll see problems.

Until we awaken, those unconscious drivers will continue to steer us down the road of life. If you’re happy with the results you are getting, enjoy the ride. If you’re not, it may be time to do something about it.

What are you going to do?

PS — One thing you can do is relax. You can now hear samples of healing.

Author's Bio: 

Dr. Joe Vitale is the star of the hit movie, "The Secret." He is also the author of way too many bestselling books to mention here. To name a few: The Attractor Factor, Zero Limits and his latest, Attract Money Now. He's also recorded many Nightingale Conant audio programs, and most recently, "The Abundance Paradigm." He also created a Miracles Coaching program and much more! For more information on Joe Vitale, go to: