The Importance Of Emotional Availability In Parent-Child Relation

One day the little Biju was waiting for his father for long hours. As the door bell rung, the little boy ran to the door step to open the door. There was a smile in his face and it seems that he was having something in his mind. As the father entered the house, Biju asked, “Papa, how much do you earn in a day?”. Father got surprised and with little smile told Biju, “I ea
1500 in a day”. The little Biju kept the silence for some time and then ask his father to give him Rs. 800.

As his father was tired, he got angry and started scolding Biju. With few drops of tears, the little boy went to his room. At night, the father thought about the matter and went to his son’s room. Biju was awake and as his father entered the room, he asked, “What happened papa?”. The father replied, “Nothing my little boy. Just tell me one thing why did you ask for the money that time?”. Biju said, “Papa, I wanted to buy one day of yours. I have Rs 700 in my piggy bank. So I need more 800 and thus I asked you for that”. The drops of tears automatically started falling from the father’s eyes and he hold the little boy tightly in his arms. As an artisan gives beautiful shapes to soft clay, it is the love and patience of the parents that gives right directions to their child’s life. When children enjoy a supportive environment in their home, they also become emotionally competent adults.

Parents can be considered the first friend, philosopher and guide of a child. There should be emotional availability among parents and their children. this availability is more than just picking the children from the school, spending a fun day with them or taking the dinner together at night. A small hug or a few words can do magic in this relationship. The degree and quality of your communication and connection with your child play a big role in strengthening their self esteem and making them a competent survivor in life. This bonding also may have some impacts on the future relationships of your child. A child who faces a passimistic environment in the home during childhood days, may also show the signs of passimism in the future life. Thus it becomes very important to nurture this relation with love, patience and dedication. When the father and the mother display a sound relationship, the child also get inspired from that.

Whenever possible, talk to your child; try to understand your child’s feelings and what they want to convey to you. Tell the child about different members of the family so that the child can also develop a familiarity with the ancestors. If you have a grown up daughter or son, ask them before taking a decision. This will develop in them a feeling of trust and belongingness. Encourage your children to engage in positive, cooperative activities together to build a positive and pleasurable repertoire in their relationship. Our own parents are often our only models of how to relate to children, so they usually have a powerful influence on us, no matter whether we want to emulate them or be completely different. As adults, we need to recognize the heritage we have brought with us from the family in which we ourselves were raised and to replicate what was good and eliminate what was not.