The Journey of Infertility

If you're like most couples who are in love, it's easy to nurture that deep desire to procreate and want to see the fruit of your love. Back in the 1800s and early 1900s if you married young it seemed normal to have children shortly after. The men went to work and the women stayed home and took care of the household and children. In this day in era having children right after you marry is usually put on the back burner.

Acquiring an education and building a successful career has become a priority for the vast majority who wish to make it on to the A list- if you will. Couples place their focus on getting a college education before starting a family. By the time they achieve their career goals to become physicians, lawyers, biologist or other high profile professions, most females are usually in their mid thirties to early forties by now. More often than not they have either reached premature menopause or are close to it. Which means that they no longer have viable ovaries to produce fertile eggs. This is vital in order to produce healthy embryos. As they begin the process to become pregnant, time continues to tick away again yet not realizing that their window of fertility continues to shrink with every year that passes. By the time the couple comes to the realization that they may be dealing with a fertility factor they have waited too long mother nature. It usually takes around three to four years before most couples seek the services of a fertility specialist.

As the couple embarks on this journey of uncertainty they often discover a whole new world. One can never underestimate how much support you will need so you get through this without losing yourself. The psychological and emotional effects of the IVF process can become overwhelming. Its even a stigma in some cultures if you are married and never produce any off spring. It affects every single part of their lives. Their entire life revolves around investigations and treatments and it's such a private thing that people tend to isolate themselves and feel they can't turn to family and friends.

There is no greater thing that a couple can go through together. It makes or breaks a relationship. I always advise that they accept all the support they can get, no matter where you get it from. Many couples isolate themselves and their emotions. A Often wishing they had sought support earlier. This truly is a challenging journey. You are thrust into a whole new world that may seem complicated and overwhelming. Significant people in your life may not understand how you're feeling, what you're suffering or the difficult choices that lie ahead. You are undergoing fertility treatments that may be invasive and painful. Which is why many couples struggling with infertility have turned to a fertility coach to help them through diagnosis and treatment. Infertility and its treatment can be a frightening, stressful, confusing, and lonely time and a coach can help couples learn to support each other, gain coping skills, face the potentially insensitive questions of friends and family, and practice stress management techniques.

As a fertility coach I help clients sort through the often intense emotions associated with infertility and treatment and provide encouragement, options, and perspective when my client becomes discouraged and loses the motivation or ability to continue.

The following are just a few tips I would like to share.

1. Be your own best friend: give yourself the same level of care, understanding and support that you would to your best friend.

2. Be kind to yourself and your partner: you will deal with the situation in different ways, so it's important to work together, not against each other.

3. Do everything you can to lead a fulfilling life and don't put your life on hold.

4. Be proactive about socializing: make a conscious effort to plan fun things and book time with friends.

To all the couples trying to conceive may the biggest miracle take place in your lives and make your dreams come true.

5. Seek the help and support you deserve before it's too late.
Betty Frausto Fertility Coach
Program Coordinator for Fertility Mattersr
Egg Donor Program
fertilitycoachbetty@gmail.com
Expect The Best!!