Most of us live our lives identifying ourselves as someone who is completely separate and independent of other people, places, circumstances and situations.

We have the experience that other people, places, circumstances and situations just “randomly happen to us” - completely independent of us and we are powerless to do anything about it.

Our employees don’t show up to work on time, we struggle with increasing our income and sales, we have the belief that we can’t do well in our business because of our location, competitors or the economy. 

We get upset when our spouses are irritable and irrational and we feel powerless over our bodies, our diet and illness and disease.

We think life just happens to us

While we experience life as happening to us - completely independent of us,what is actually happening is that we are always interpreting, judging, evaluating and assessing everything that occurs. 

It is human nature to constantly interpret and give meaning to everything that happens in our lives. 

Many of us fail to realize that our beliefs and interpretations are actually creating our reality, or current results and outcomes. 

We create our reality through what we believe and tell ourselves “is the truth” about everything we experience (in regards to people, places, circumstances and events in our lives)

We do this through creating new interpretations, imagining our desired future, taking a stand to reinvent ourselves, choosing to be our future vision right now in the present and committing to what we’ve chosen.

This principle proposes that we take on a radically different interpretation of our lives where we have the awareness that the drama in our lives isn’t where the meaning lives.

While we may be powerless over the upsetting people and situations we get to choose what we are going to have the drama and upset mean to us.

We can decide what kind of meaning we are going to give to our particular situation

The meaning is in what we say and what we choose to have the drama mean.  We can choose to give power to new interpretations through our declarations and our word will have power. 

It has to do with living as our word and our commitment as it exists in language. 

I can choose to take on the interpretation that what is causing my experience isn’t anyone or anything else - that it’s actually me through the meaning that I’m giving to my situation (how I am interpreting my situation or interactions).

When my wife is cranky and crabby can I create a new interpretation and context of love and understanding? 

Where I don’t experience a loss of power, so there isn’t resistance to the way she is being? 

When an employee is underperforming can I create a new interpretation of empowering them to live up to their full potential and be a stellar, high-performing employee?

If we are able to, in that space other people and situations can often self-correct. 

While we don’t have control over how other people will show up we do have 100% control over our interpretations and how we choose to show up regardless of how others choose to respond.

We can choose to identify ourselves as the creative beings that we truly are - as someone who is generating and creating our life rather then the usual interpretation of feeling like a powerless victim who is subject to other people and circumstances.

 As we identify ourselves as the creative beings that we are we realize that we have the ability to interpret our situations, people, places and circumstances in a new and empowering way. 

It is helpful to keep in mind that 99% of the time we will probably experience “life as happening to us.”  And we won’t be aware that we are creating our reality through our interpretations. 

However, every moment we can choose to become aware of our interpretations - what we are telling ourselves to be true about the people and events in our life and gain access to a more powerful interpretation.

Today’s Action Step & Reminder

Today I will be aware of any circumstances that arise that cause me to experience any kind of emotional upset: anger, guilt, sadness, overwhelm, anxiety or stuckness of any kind.

When I notice these feelings I will pause and take a few moments to reflect (whether it’s in the moment, or later after I’ve removed myself from the situation). 

I’ll ask myself, “What are the beliefs that I’m holding about this situation that might be triggering my emotional upset?” I will make a comprehensive list of all associated beliefs.

Then I will be willing to examine the truth of my beliefs one by one and ask, “Is this belief necessarily true?”  I will stay with each belief until I can see clearly that it is not necessarily true.

Ultimately, while I may not have control or power over other people, places and things, I do have control over is how I am interpreting my situation. 

And the only way I can gain insight into my interpretations is to by examining and questioning my beliefs and replacing them with something more empowering.

I’ll continue until I’ve explored all my beliefs that arise about my situation and replace them with new possibility that gives me a great sense of freedom and choice about the action I choose to take in regards to the person or the situation.

“Beliefs have the power to create and the power to destroy.  Human beings have the awesome ability to take any experience of their lives and create a meaning that disempowers them or one that can literally save lives” – Tony Robbins

Author's Bio: 

Leslie Cunningham specializes in working with women entrepreneurs who experience fear and self-doubt in their ability to consistently make more money in their business. The end result that women achieve through following Leslie's advice and expertise is that they are able to permanently get off the emotional financial roller coaster ride and break into six-figures and beyond.