The seven year itch. There is this idea that when a person has been in a committed loyal relationship for at least seven years they are likely to get bored and restless and want to cheat. In fact there are so many men who believe this that a lot of men on dating sites write to women they do not know who are married and looking for friendship and ask them how long they have been married. They then sit there hoping the reply will be at least seven years, because in their eyes any female who has been with a guy that long is ripe for the picking and will be easy to seduce.

I find this quite unrealistic and pathetic. As I have spoken to a lot of women who have thought of cheating on their partner and also many who actually did cheat on their partner. Some were only married for a few months, the length of the relationship had nothing to do with their decision. The things that mattered to them were whether or not the guy could make them laugh, whether or not he was romantic, whether or not he was honest, loyal and attention. She is hardly going to find a man who has a great sense of humour, is honest, loyal and attentive if the man is married and just sniffing around for casual sex. Which is why most of the women, if they are seriously looking to cheat, prefer a single man and tend to shun the married ones. The single ones are more likely to be honest, can be more flexible and generous with their time and try harder.

If someone does get fidgety after seven years then it is probably that they married the wrong person, neither of them worked hard enough or were realistic enough about their relationship or it is a simple coincidence. And it might be that if you had spoken to them two years previously they felt the same then.

If the only reason you are thinking of cheating is because of an itch it is not worth it anyway. Unless your relationship is a disaster and you are happy to risk losing them altogether, or planning to leave them anyway, a bit of fun is not worth risking so much over. Especially when the other person is someone who does not really care about you and will probably disappear if anything happens.

If you do want to cheat do it for the "right" reasons, if such a thing exists, and be very careful, because nearly everyone I have counselled and done tarot and clairvoyant readings for has regretted it when it has become more than fun or their partner has found out. And by then it is too late to change your mind. If you are unhappy and wanting a serious thing then sort out your existing relationship first, trying to somehow have both at the same time, keeping the second one a secret, will never work out. And anyone who is decent and intelligent would be put off when they hear you are in a relationship and looking to sneak around. You would be wanting to make a new life with someone with morals and the right intentions, and anyone who jumps at the chance of just having you as a secret now and then has neither of these.

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Author's Bio: 

Beth Shepherd offers 40 years of experience. She is tried, tested and trusted by experts, professionals, newspapers and magazines and works as a psychic tarot reading, therapist and relationship expert.
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