I would grab women's attention usually with my height and the wide and varied things I've done with my life, even at a young age. They would let me know indirectly - moving differently than for other men in the vicinity, trying to label me, whether it was as a nice guy, a player, a charmer, a brainiac. Whatever it was, they were still talking to me and that was very good indeed. Settling into some compelling conversation - mixed with new friends coming in and leaving the conversation - I appreciated them, and felt like doing something a little more for them than teasing, fun chit-chat. They usually get some useful or funny mentionable out of me that's going to linger for a long, long time.

Then, it would happen...

It was going so great! A little hugging, a little too long looking in each others' eyes...

But she'd step back and flat out disagree with something in the conversation - that there's no such thing as a committment-phobe, that men have emotions too but just don't show them, or that Pittsburgh is the Newcastle, England of America. Even that she would disagree with, and Sting was the one to first say that. Clearly she seems to be disagreeing with me just to disagree, and things are slipping downward...

I would think that maybe I ought to drop out and chat with some other people instead before the attraction fizzles - after all, she wasn't touching me anymore, and starting to look away.

I waver, and don't decide to do anything, and even feel an urge to reverse my position just to look agreeable.
Then it gets worse. Other guys start hovering closer, looking like hungry animals who smell blood.

It would feel weaker, the energy dropping, and I'd start wondering if I was being rejected by her given this difficulty. I wanted to get away and lick my wounds.
And the more I would agree the more she would distance, demean, or even detest me.

This certainly has never happened to you, right?
Well, it's why it's actually valuable to know the hard science of the matter. When things are going well, then women "turn on you," challenging you by disagreeing, looking around at other guys, asking you for a favor, a drink, to watch her purse, or any other demand, command, criticism or negative response, it is precisely because it IS going well, and she definitely likes you.

There are four general types of tests that women throw at us.

Once I figured this out, and deciphered where it fits into the science of human courtship, it was a real thrill to know while socializing. In fact, on many occasions when a woman seemed to turn highly disagreeable, instead of walking off with my tail between my legs, I would instead now listen serenely - not fidget nervously, feel under the gun of her judgment - and then directly assert, "I understand what you're doing. It's just because you love me... Well I like you too."

Without fail this would be a stunner. She'd never heard it before - usually devolving into name calling, turning away from each other, moving on to other people and considering all the flirting up to then, a waste of time. Instead, this was an enigma and source of intense curiosity for her like never before.

And when she stopped talking and looked down, going inside herself, she realized that at least some kernel of it was true.

She loved me.

That's because I had passed one of the four tests that women do to us when they really, really like us in that special way. This one is called Woman Vs. Man as a test.
In time, there would be every manner of tactical answer for every type of test, and subtest, and context, and situation.
These tests aren't exclusive to first meetings with women. They cycle back again and again deep into a relationship. In fact, ask any man with a longtime girlfriend or wife about it. They will tell you they get tested by their woman more now than at any other time in the past.

And you'd better believe that if they handled the tests poorly in the first few interactions of their early dating, it did not bode well for the future. People are creatures of habit, and tend to keep doing what they've always done.
In many cases it's a climactic test - "the last straw" - that precipitates that final breakup.

So here are the two universal verbal responses to a woman's tests - they will generally serve you well even though you need to discover your own techniques and responses:

• The Word "No" - when you disagree with a woman's disagreement, it can go a long way to showing that you have a spine, an identity, a position, confidence and resolve. You can maintain the position for as long as you like without giving a shred of detail to counter you. In fact, it's a cheeky, fun way to begin the very first interactions with a strong, solid, attractive woman in the first place. Just say, "No. No, no, no - whatever you're about to say, just no." Then smile teasingly. Irresistible.

• Nonresponse - when you utterly ignore a test, you have transcended it, are superior to it, and there is nothing further to be done by her or your other male competitors. It is the winning position, and winning with a winning spirit is the goal and reward of this step of attraction. Women want winners even if it's you winning against them. Which is why you can mean what you say when you say that a woman disagreeing with you just plain loves you. It's a useful tactic for weeding out women who are not just romantically challenging you and feeling you out, but downright hostile - they will slowly make themselves look worse and worse, or even out of control if they are more hell-bent on being right as opposed to finding love.

Finally, it is one of the best techniques to make other competing men go away as you stare right though them as if they don't exist.

Author's Bio: 

Paul Dobransky, M.D. is a board-certified psychiatrist, public speaker and relationship expert who has treated more than 10,000 patients in 15+ years in clinical psychiatric care. Journalists and clients worldwide have sought Dr. Paul's advice on dating, relationships and all aspects of human psychology.

Dr. Paul pioneered MindOS, a new, patent-pending approach to understanding relationships, mood problems and stress. MindOS synthesizes all schools of therapy into a single, effective system-based approach that uses plain language to help people understand psychology and solve problems. Go to http://www.menspsychology.com/ to learn more.