When young girls are replaced by the birth of a son, or feel their fathers wish that they were a boy, it isn’t uncommon to try to become a man for Dad. They can be the Combat Flyer, the Executive, a Madam, Race Car Driver or the President. For these women their entire life process follows a Warrior Woman path. Later in life they become the strong woman that take on leadership. Often, they find it hard to find a man that can live up to the warrior within them. When a Warrior Woman does find a mate, it often ends up being a softer person who will, or will not, tolerate their powerful intensity.
WHEN WARRIOR WOMEN BECOME MOTHERS
When Warrior Women are mothers, it is not uncommon for them to be both father and mother in one. They may find themselves most connected to their sons, the very dynamic that they fought from happening in their own childhood with their brother. They understand testatrix energy. By now being a Warrior is so familiar they have a hard time relating to daughters that want Barbie dolls and pink rooms. The problem is later, when their son’s power needs grow. It is not uncommon to find Warrior Women at constant war with a son who longs for mother to be soft. The result may be an explosive mother son relationship.
For their daughters, Warrior Women want the best. Most of all they want their daughters to be powerful. When daughter's needs are softer, they may turn off or become constantly critical of their daughters choices. Daughter may not have the same issues as the Warrior Mothers. Warrior mother may see that power choices of politics, sports devas, debate, city councils and presidency leaderships will help to enhance daughter’s life. Daughter’s choices may see this as mothers need to “run the show”. Usually both daughter and son may wish that the Warrior mother would just learn to be a mother and not a warrior at home.
WHEN THE WARRIOR WOMAN REACHES HER MIDDLE YEARS PEAK
I have found many middle aged Warrior women reach a power peak in their fifties. They have attained full respect. Even the struggling younger warriors can not light a candle to them. There seems to be a point where the Warrior woman says to her self, “Ok…..what else is there?” They have met their challenges. Presidency in organizations is second nature and often not even asked for anymore. An unfamiliar discontent settles in. They may see themselves wondering if somewhere on their life path they stepped over gifts and blessings trying to be a boy for their father. The unhappy struggling little girl within them suddenly finds no need to struggle. She may also see that to win now, is to recognize the future holds infinite amounts of choice for her. How to stop placing so much need in winning and being powerful, becomes both yearned for and terrifying. After all, being a warrior is part of who she is. Or is it?
WHEN THE WARRIOR WOMAN'S FATHER DIES
When a middle aged Warrior woman’s father dies, it isn’t unusual for the origin of their struggle for power to lesson. Of course by now it is a natural part of who these women are. By middle years if there is a brother he is well settled into a family or another life of his own. Even he stops being a challenge. The Warrior woman is stuck with a part of her past, the very dynamic that created her, no longer being relevant.
BECOMING THE GENTLE WARRIOR
In my readings with discontent Warrior women I do not suggest they stop being powerful. We would be lost without their example in this Universe. Often the answer to finding peace within them selves is to find groups of spiritual people interested in studying modern Native American Spiritualism, or joining group seminars that teach the ways of the Gentle Warrior. The struggling voices of competition can die and be replaced with the wisdom of their life lessons. Often these women have lessons to teach other women through books or public speaking, once they have found their own way.
How to stop placing so much need in winning and being powerful, becomes both yearned for and terrifying. After all, being a warrior is part of who she is.