The Simple Ingredients for a Less Stressful Life

Stress. Stress creeps into all parts of our lives when we let it. We can even be stressed when we're happy. But when we're sad, stress seems magnified like our lives are moving in slides on the big screen.

And stress will kick us when we're down. If we're sad, depressed, anxious, angry, or worried, it seems ten times more difficult to get past the stressful events in our lives. Little things can blow up and seemingly take on a life of their own. They take on our lives and even try to take them over. And the big things? Well, we might as well just give up. Right?

Maybe for a moment. We are human after all. But after you allow yourself a five minute mini-meltdown, it's time to refocus and take back some control. There are very few things in life that we can control, but we can control how we react to difficult or stressful events. If you want to let these things in life get the best of you, take responsibility for that decision. But if you truly want to live a happier life, cut yourself some slack and allow yourself to do what's necessary to make happiness happen.

Happiness, and especially stress management, takes work. You have to be actively involved in your own life. Many people spend a lot of time active in other people's lives and happiness... but what about your life and your happiness? Who's helping you? Shouldn't you put on your own oxygen mask before you help someone else with theirs?

I'm not saying you shouldn't help others, but when you're happy and healthy, you will be stronger and more able to make a difference in someone else's life. Life is hard and you need to be prepared and strong enough to handle those tough blows when they come, and you need to have the strength it takes to be there for others when they need it.

So what can you do?

Stress management comes in many forms. Each individual's stress management strategies should be as unique as the individuals themselves. This is where it helps to know yourself well and allow yourself to fulfill your own joys in life.

Take the time to do some things that you want to do. Not what others want you to do, or what you think you "should" do.

It's okay and even encouraged to be silly. If you like to dance but are embarrassed about being the world's worst dancer (a title I will challenge you for), then do it when no one's watching. But don't shut down or block any idea or passion just because you're afraid of how you may look or what others may think.

Denying yourself fun and passion in life is a sure fire way to remain stressed and unhappy. But allowing yourself those things will make the hard and un-enjoyable much more tolerable.

If I've learned anything from my years of research it's that there are a few very simple ingredients for managing the stress in our lives.

The first is to understand that effective stress management isn't relaxation alone, although that certainly will help. Being active and having fun can be just as effective as relaxing in a hot bath. The second is to keep an open mind, use your imagination and take the time to unwind in a way that only you can choose. There is no right way to relax and relieve stress. However, and this is the final ingredient, there is a wrong way to relieve stress. Be sure to avoid alcohol, caffeine, and other unhealthy stimulants or depressants. These things can increase your nervous energy and make it much more difficult for you to recover from stress, depression, anxiety, etc.

And remember, if it's been awhile since you've allowed yourself some fun or relaxation... or if you're facing some BIG obstacles, it may take some time to see the benefits. But don't give up on yourself. If something doesn't work, try it again or try something else. Arm yourself with all the tools you can. Try new things, have some fun, and hold yourself accountable for your own stress management.

Take a stand against stress and take action towards a less stressful life.