Understanding Bisexuality

Some people are straight, while others are not. We often refer to those who are not straight as homosexuals—either gays or lesbians to be exact. But, there is an often-overlooked segment of the gay/lesbian and straight communities: the bisexuals, also popularly known as “bi’s”. So what exactly is bisexuality?

According to Wikipedia, “bisexuality is a sexual orientation which refers to the romantic and/or sexual attraction of individuals to others of either genders or sexes.” However, a bisexual person may have varying degrees of attraction to either sexes, and may not necessarily have an equal attraction to both sexes. Unlike homosexuality, this sexual orientation is loosely interpreted; bisexuality is often perceived as just a “phase or transition”, and that bisexuals simply can’t make up their minds whether to go straight or gay.

However, just like homosexuality, the causes of bisexuality are far from understood. Some people believe that a person is born with a specific sexual orientation, while others think that this is mostly due to socialization or the individual’s own choice; for some, it is a mix of both. Since a person’s biological, social and cultural factors differ for each person, one’s sexuality is entirely unique from the other. Although a lot of people presume that bisexuality is just a phase some people go through, any sexual orientation can actually be described as a phase. As humans, we are different from each other.

Each person has his/her own sexual feelings and behaviour, which may constantly change over time. The formation of an individual’s sexuality is a continuing process, so bisexuality may just be a transitional step for many people who are in the process of accepting their sexual preferences, or a secure, long-term individuality. Most gay men can be easily identified by the clothes they wear and their manner of speech. While there are those who are still “in the closet”, a lot of gays today are “out and proud”; they have no qualms about revealing their true sexual orientation. Lesbians are becoming even harder to identify, because most of them nowadays wear makeup and sexy clothes, and would often be mistaken as straight women.

Bisexuals are no different-- just as gays and lesbians, they come in all sorts of shapes and sizes, from all occupations, and from all walks of life. Often, the stereotypes about bisexuals as unreliable, sex-crazed and not queer enough are more myth than truth. One common myth about a bisexual person is that he/she constantly needs to be sexually involved with both a man and a woman simultaneously. This is a usual misconception, because some bisexuals don’t even engage in sexual activity with one or either genders. They can be just like heterosexuals and gays, who may choose to be sexually involved with an exclusive partner in a long-term, monogamous relationship.

However, there are no set rules as far as relationship goes, so it is not surprising if some may be involved in open marriages. This kind of marriage may permit relationships with same-sex partners, three-way relationships, or a number of partners of the same or opposite gender, whether one at a time or simultaneously. However, it should be kept in mind that this is not the same for all bisexual persons. Rather, it depends on the individual and upon the attitudes of the person.