Wanting vs Ready to Be in Love
Written by Cheri Valentine
So many people want to be in love. It's a great place to be when it is healthy and satisfying your requirements, needs, and wants. Yet so few people are really clear about what these are for them. If you've been in relationships that have ended, and you have allowed yourself time for grieving, letting go, understanding of how you both contributed to the dynamics, and living your life in the present with joy then you are more ready to be in love than with someone who has not.
There is a difference between wanting to be in love and ready to be in love. Wanting to be in love implies a longing without taking responsibility for what being in love really entails for you and your life. It's a desire or a wish for someone else to come in and make your life better, or fill in a void. Often there is a chasing or settling quality about your experience, and often results in unsatisfactory relationships, and often you rely solely on physical chemistry to guide you. When you want to be in love, you are not necessarily ready to be in love.
Ready to be in love means that you have taken the time to heal from past experiences. You have also examined these experiences for understanding and clarity in moving forward to what is right for you. You have taken responsibility for your life, relationships and how you've shown up in them. You are enjoying your life, clear about who you are, what you want and willing to balance your head and heart in making choices about love. When you are ready for love, rather than the experience stem from falling or hoping. It is rooted in choice, which in my opinion is far healthier.
Take a moment to look at your motives and actions towards dating, love, and relationships. Ask yourself the following questions: Do you want to be in love just for love's sake? How will being in love improve or alter your life? What do you bring to the equation? Is something missing from your life that you hope being in love will fix? What steps can you take to feel confident that you are ready and willing to be in the love with the perfect person for you?
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