‘I am better than you’ mindset is an outcome of the ego that wants to be superior to others and desperately wants to be ahead than the rest. Such ego develops with the help of an intellect that keeps comparing one’s self and competing with the people around him, and in the process collects various proofs such as:

•I can do so and so work better than others,
•I have so and so skills,
•I have so much of talent,
•I have studied so much,
•I have completed so many projects,
•I have so much of following,
•I can get work done by others, etc.

In order to prove how I am better than others.
The central aspect of such mindset is ‘grandiosity’. It simply tends to think highly of one’s self in every aspect, for no good reason. He always has a positive view of himself compared to other people as his intellect chooses to show him only the brighter side of his own self, on the basis of which he can be considered better than others. He thinks himself to be better at a variety of skills, than he actually is.

And when it comes to acknowledging his faults or any mistakes that got committed by him, the intellect is quick enough to suppress and bury them for they are not to be remembered or retained in memory. If someone from outside tries to highlight his faults, he will instantly pull that person down as he does not like any red signal on his path of progress that tries to stop him from surpassing others and being seen better than them.

People with the mindset ‘I am better than you’ are often focused on only attaining dominance and therefore are found to be disagreeable, aggressive and hostile in their interactions, having a very low or fragile self-esteem. They are worried of shame all the time. Such mindset denotes arrogance as they behave in a way that is rude, harsh and oozing with over- confidence.

Arrogance represents insecurity. The person with such mindset is often too scared from within of losing his control and superiority over others and hence keeps throwing his weight over others. The moment such a person sees someone that could prove better than him, even when he just senses some risk from that person, jealousy and ill-feeling crops up immediately in his mind and he is out to drive that person out from his range of control as soon as possible.

Such mindset also depicts a sign of immaturity that emerges out of one’s extremely strong need to look good.
Whenever a tree bears fruits, it always bends all the more and is welcoming and liked by all.
One who is Mature and Enlightened is full of Self-confidence that comes from the right knowledge and therefore He can very easily get his point across, and that too quite emphatically and without demeaning or intimidating anyone:

•through the immense Love flowing from His heart
•Through His unmatched humility that betrays a feeling of superiority
•Through His outstanding virtue of benevolence and kindness and
•Through His convincing words doing magic in other’s heart
One who is maturing displays signs of:
•Subservient attitude,
•Following instructions (Aagna) of the Enlightened One ardently,
•Diverting his energies towards Positive, creative and constructive,
•Having good self-esteem.

Such a person gets better than others in the right sense as he has no desire to build himself up by boasting or putting others down; and he can easily accept his weaknesses or faults with grace and the willingness to improve.

It is never too late...
One can always look at changing one’s mindset by:
1.acknowledging that this mindset is wrong to have
2.deeply understanding how this mindset is harming me and hurting others
3.sincerely repenting for one’s wrong-doings so far
4.not protecting this mindset anymore hereafter
5.willing to change the mindset by seeing the one who is Mature and Enlightened.
6.Have the intent to remain in the company of the Enlightened being (Gnani) and try to learn from Him what should be the goal of our life and what is the right way forward...

Please visit https://www.dadabhagwan.org/path-to-happiness/self-help/competition-in-d...

Author's Bio: 

Ambalal M. Patel was a civil contractor by profession. In June 1958, spontaneous Self-Realization occurred within Ambalal M. Patel. From this point on, Ambalal became a Gnani Purush, and the Lord that manifest within him became known as Dada Bhagwan. A Gnani Purush is One who has realized the Self and is able help others do the same. Param Pujya Dada Bhagwan used to go from town to town and country-to-country to give satsang (spiritual discourse) and impart the knowledge of the Self, as well as knowledge of harmonious worldly interactions to everyone who came to meet him. This spiritual science, known as Akram Vignan, is the step-less path to Self-realization