When we are identified with the ego, we feel lacking, life feels lacking, and others feel lacking. The state of ego-identification is a state of never having enough, of discontentment, judgment, fear, doubt, and other negative emotions. When we are identified with the ego, the world revolves around "me," "my problems," and "my life." This state is a one of contraction and suffering.

The state of lack that is ego-identification is not only an uncomfortable state, but an unattractive one. When people are deeply identified with the ego, you can see the tension in their faces and bodies. You can hear the suffering in their voice and in what they talk about. Energetically, you can feel the negativity that accompanies this state. When you are around someone who is expressing and living out the ego's negativity, you feel either drained, bored, repulsed, or bad, since their energy is often contagious. Their negative inner state gets reflected outwardly and is felt energetically, and it doesn't attract support or opportunities from others. Naturally, those in such a state want to manifest or attract love, support, opportunities, and other things, but the state of lack and negativity that such people are experiencing actually repels these things. Neediness is not attractive.

From this lack, many desires are born. The ego creates both the sense of lack and also the desire to manifest something to fill that lack. The solution is not to get the things, experiences, or circumstance that the ego wants to manifest, which it believes will end the lack and discontentment (but which are never enough), but rather to see that the sense of lack is a lie. That anything is lacking or necessary in order for you to be happy is the core lie that keeps the ego intact and going after one desire after another.

The antidote is to see that nothing in this moment is lacking, which is the truth. Lack is a story told by the ego, and it tells this story no matter what is happening or how much you have. When you begin to tell another story—the truth, instead of the ego's lies—your internal state changes, and you feel happy, content, loving, grateful, and generous. These feeling states not only feel good but are very attractive and attract to you support, love, and opportunities. Focusing on what is here—what you love about life, yourself, and others— rather than on what is "lacking" is the antidote to the sense of lack and the driving neediness of the ego.

This positive internal state is the state of alignment with Essence, your true nature. And it brings you the true happiness and peace that you and every human being long for. The experience of your true nature is so full and complete that you won't feel the need to manifest something or make your life turn out a particular way, and yet, life naturally brings you all the good that it intends for you. What it brings you will be aligned with the Whole, and that is a much more satisfying and fulfilling experience than getting what the "me" wants.

Find the place within you that is already full, complete, happy, and at peace with life. That fullness will draw to you and allow you to receive exactly what you need, and you will no longer feel that you have to manifest something to be happy. That's freedom, and that's what you really want. To be free of the need to manifest something in order to be happy is true happiness.

Author's Bio: 

Gina Lake is a spiritual teacher who is devoted to helping others wake up and live in the moment through her books, counseling, and intensives. She has a master's degree in counseling psychology and over twenty years experience supporting people in their spiritual growth. Her books include Loving in the Moment, Radical Happiness, Embracing the Now, Anatomy of Desire, Return to Essence, What About Now? Living in the Now, and Getting Free. Her website offers information about her books and consultations, free e-books, book excerpts, a free monthly newsletter, a blog, and audio and video recordings: http://www.radicalhappiness.com.
Copyright © 2010 Gina Lake. All rights reserved.