Article

Why No Contact with Ex-Girlfriends Is the Best Way to Win Her Back

Written by Steve Steiner

Topic: Relationship AdvicePublished March 30, 2011
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Hey buddy, I know that if you’re reading this, then you’re probably struggling with a break up. If your girlfriend dumped you and you’ve seemingly tried everything to get her back, but she just won’t listen or you can’t seem to get through to her, then let me tell you why no contact with your ex-girlfriend can seriously help you.

Know, before you completely freak out on me and think I’m talking nonsense, let me just tell you that I understand where you’re coming from. It seems like you’ve got a communication problem with your ex-girlfriend. She just doesn’t understand how much you love her or how sorry you are for anything you may have done wrong. And if it’s a communication problem, how will cutting off communication completely help at all?

Well, let me introduce you to the No Contact rule and why it’s so great. Basically, all you’re doing is not contacting your ex-girlfriend for 3 or 4 weeks.

Why does this work? It works for two reasons.

First, it respects your ex-girlfriend’s need for space. No matter why she said she broke up with you, she did it because she wanted space away from you or the relationship. If you’re constantly trying to contact her or tell her how important she is to you, then you are not respecting her request for space from the relationship.

This makes her feel like she has to push you even further away to get that space. And this of course, only compels you to want to try harder to get through to her. Have you ever been caught in this vicious circle?

On the other hand, if you actually stop contacting her entirely, you’re giving her exactly what she wanted. During this time, she may even reach the conclusion that she misses you and that her life was better off with you in it. You see, giving her space can actually help your relationship.

Secondly, it gives you time to heal. After getting dumped, you’re probably a bit emotional right now. Maybe you’ve even done somethings you’re not too proud of. I know I sure did!

Every time you think about checking your ex-girlfriend’s FaceBook page or calling her just to see if she misses you or if she’s taking things as hard as you are, you know you’re only asking for trouble. You know it’s not good for you, but you just can’t seem to help it.

Doesn’t it seem like every time you contact her you just learn something new that makes you feel sick to your stomach. Maybe she’s dating some new guy--or worse yet, one of her friends. Maybe even someone you met once. It’s just enough to make you a wreck for the rest of the day.

Dude, you really don’t need this in your life! Especially right now. Not contacting your ex for about a month is so helpful in helping you work through your tough emotions and healing without reopening the wounds of the break up by exposing yourself to news like this.

So, if not for your ex-girlfriend, try doing the No Contact rule for yourself for about 3 or 4 weeks. You’ll be surprised at how much better you’ll feel after a few weeks without that constant mental anguish.

Article author

About the Author

If you'd like to discover some fool-proof signs your ex wants you back, or other ways of handling your breaking and getting her back, be sure to check out Get Back My Girlfriend. Steve Steiner enjoys helping men improve their relationship and manage the problems that they may experience in relating with and dating women.

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