Do you need help in overcoming shyness? If you suffer from shyness, you probably often wish that your shyness would instantly go away, never to return. For some people, being shy can be a small problem. For others, shyness can be life crippling.

Some people suffer from extreme shyness that is very intense. Extreme shyness can result in a life of lost opportunities in love, friendship, dating and career opportunities.

People who are extremely shy can feel absolutely overwhelmed with uncomfortable emotions and physical sensations every time they try to talk to somebody. Even if they are talking to someone they know quite well, they are filled with terrible shyness sensations of feeling ashamed and worry over being judged. Their heart may pound uncontrollably, their face may flush red with embarassment, and their voice may tremble.

For some people who are extremely shy, it can seem easier just to give up and try avoid the social situations that cause these shyness symptoms to appear.

Unfortunately, when shy people give up talking to others, they end up reinforcing their shyness symptoms. They also end up creating a life of increasing loneliness for themselves.

So, what can shy people do to overcome their fears of talking and interacting with others? If someone has a case of shyness that is moderate, more practice in being sociable can help. The worst thing to do for shyness is to avoid social situations.

Should a shy person seek help from a therapist? In some cases seeing a therapist for shyness can be a good idea. There are forms of psychotherapy that can help overcome shyness, and there are forms of psychotherapy that don’t seem to alleviate shyness at all.

Those forms of therapy where a patient has to dig deeply into the past to uncover all sorts of incidents and trauma don’t work to overcome shyness.

There are other forms of therapy that seem to work better in helping shy people overcome their fears and become more sociable. Two of the most successful forms of therapy for overcoming shyness are cognitive therapy and behavioral therapy.

Cognitive therapy encourages the shy person to notice the kinds of harsh, judgmental thoughts he is having when he is trying to talk to people, and teaches the person to change his thinking patterns.

Behavioral therapy offers a very structured program with a system of rewards for completing the desired behavior. For example, a person who is afraid of talking to women can accumulate a number of points for initiating conversations with women, and these points can then be traded for a reward.

For people who suffer from social phobia, some anti-depressant drugs such as Paxil have been shown to be helpful, but the improvement in sociability will only last as long as the drug is taken. When the drug is discontinued, the beneficial effect will wear off.

A shy person who has a mild form of shyness may be able to improve their situation simply by reading articles and books on dealing with shyness, and by implementing the suggestions offered.

A more severe case of shyness or social phobia may require the help of a trained professional who has a good track record of success in helping shy people overcome their problems.

The effort to get rid of shyness is worth it, because a lifetime of good friendships and relationships awaits.

Author's Bio: 

This article is by self improvement author Royane Real. You can read many more articles that will improve your life at my new website at